Just call me Shameless
by OhPenelope5446
Summary: "I cannot name this, I cannot explain this, and I really don't want to just call me shameless. I can't even slow this down let alone stop this and I keep looking around, but I cannot top this.." Ani DiFranco Lets see... Lemons, Cannon, AH, OOC.
1. Chapter 1 Rude Boy

**A/N Hello everybody! Trying this out to see how it fits. Very rough still so I apologize. Love it? Hate it? Leave it in a review! **

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Not a single thing. All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of Stephenie Meyer. There is no copyright infringement intended.**

BPOV

This wasn't like me…

I didn't do stuff like this…

I woke up and my head was throbbing, my throat was dry, and my vagina ached. I tried to rack my brains to figure out what the fuck happened last night when I felt movement next me. I looked over and gasped. I saw a long, lean, toned back and on top was messy brown hair with hints of red. I _definitely_ didn't do things like this. The man rolled over and I gasped again. He was fuckhawt.

I slept with that?

I _SLEPT_ with that?

The Adonis? Really?

I rolled over with the sheet covering me and groaned. Yep I'd definitely slept with that… oh my God I was so sore.

Reality struck. I had to get out of here before he woke and realized he'd slept with me and proceeded to tell me to get out. I could only imagine the confrontation upon his discovering he'd slept with someone like _ME_. I didn't think I could handle it. Not after what happened with Jake.

As I looked around I realized we must have been in his hotel room. The room was huge! Must be like a suite or something…and expensive. I pulled the sheet with me as I got up and saw the "god" in all his glory. Jeebus! His toned arms and abs with his happy trail leading to his incredibly hard dick. I licked my lips when I saw it. It was fully erect like it was saluting me good morning and what a good morning it was. No wonder I was so sore. He had probably just ruined me for every other man…

I stalled for a second as flashes of the night before started creeping back into my conscience… all the groaning, moaning, touching, and grasping. Sex against the wall, on the counter, in the shower, on the bed…a few times…yep, definitely ruined me for other men. Couldn't I stay and try it one last time? Please! It's not like I'll get anything like this again.

As I was lost in thought, he moaned again and rolled over. I knew I was running out of time before he woke up. I roamed around the room trying to find all my articles of clothing. I found my black dress, bra, and heels. I could not for the life of me find my underwear. I was in the living room of his hotel room searching through the couch when I heard a buzzing noise coming from the bedroom followed by a lot of cussing. I grabbed my bag and attempted to bolt for the door. Underwear be damned! Of course, me being me, I tripped on something as I fled.

"Shit!" I said as I limped toward the door. That was when the man himself emerged from the room.

"Um, hey," he said in a gravelly voice.

"Hi," I stammered, trying really hard not to look at his naked form in the door frame. I failed miserably and at that moment wished that I had underwear on. I was drenched.

"Where are you going in such a hurry?" I glanced at him and he smirked. Oh God. Underwear… Why didn't I have my underwear?

"Umm, forgot I had some place to be. So, umm, thanks for the night and whatnot," I said waving my hand around the room. "See ya!" I was at the door now and reaching for the handle when I felt him beside me.

"I had a good time." The only thing he had on was a necklace and, oh, how I wanted to grab him by it… I turned to face him and he put his hands up beside my head. I realized then that I was pressed against the door. Isn't this how we started?

"Um, yeah, me too." I squeaked. Yes, I squeaked.

"Maybe we can meet again sometime?" He grabbed my hand in his and kissed each of my knuckles. I was puddle of mush.

"Um. Yeah. Sure. Next time I'm in Vegas and you're in Vegas… we'll hook up?" Was that supposed to be a question? I wasn't sure. I was confused at how we could meet up again. I didn't know anything about this man except that he had an exceptional dick and, from what I remembered, moves that I've never seen before.

"Mmmmhmmm," is all he said shaking his head yes as he started sucking on my pointer finger.

Oh, my God… I moaned. He leaned in slowly and captured my lips. The kiss was sweet and slow at first and then it grew to a frenzied pace. I wrapped my hands around his neck and tugged on his hair. He groaned. I was touching, he was touching, and soon my legs were wrapped around him. His cock pressed against me. Eliciting another groan when he found I had no underwear on.

His hands grabbed my ass while his mouth attacked mine. Pressing me to the door, he slowly moved his hands toward the front as his mouth headed down my neck to my collarbone.

"My God, you're so wet," he said as his hand traveled to circle my clit.

I groaned in his mouth and that egged him on. Suddenly he thrust two fingers in me and was finger fucking me against the door. Dear God what he could do with his fingers… He plunged and circled and plunged and circled over and over again in a delicious, tortuous pattern.

"Ungh," I moaned and within seconds I was cumming with such intensity I saw white spots.

As I was practically seeing stars, he twirled me around and walked me over to the couch never breaking our kiss. As he laid me down and threw my legs over his shoulders, I heard some ripping noises and suddenly I was completely consumed by him. Yep, definitely ruined for other men…

He pulled my dress down exposing my nipples, hard and erect. He sucked on them and started a slow rhythm and built up until he was thrusting into me so hard I couldn't talk; all I could do was moan. He was so deep.

He laid his head on my shoulder, while his hand fondled my breast. Suddenly without notice he flipped me over to all fours. He was grasping and pulling my right nipple while continuing to pound into me. I let my arms drop so my head was flat on the couch. He and I both groaned at the depth he was going. I felt like I could feel every inch of him. He grabbed my ass hard. I knew he was getting close.

"You're coming too," he said so gravely and sultry it was almost my undoing. He reached around and pinched my clit pulling it and circling it. That was it for me. As I came long and hard I screamed.

"Oh, my God! Fuck, Fuck, Fuck!" I closed my eyes.

This must have been his undoing because within seconds he was cursing and frantically pushing into me. I could feel his dick pulsating as he emptied into the condom. With shaky breath he pulled out and collapsed on top of me.

It took a minute to catch my breath. When I finally gained my bearings and looked back at him, he was fast asleep. I kissed his lips. I'm not sure what possessed me. I doubted I would ever see this man again. As I thought about it, I figured I'd at least write a note and leave my number. He could do with it what he wanted. I mean maybe we could meet up again? He hadn't kicked me out when he saw me and he gave me the most intense orgasm, or orgasms, I should say, of my life. He was worth keeping around, right? At least that's what I told myself as I jotted down a note and my number.

I left that room and somehow I felt like I left everything behind. I had just met this man, but somehow I felt like I was losing a part of myself that I would never get back. Though I was optimistic and hoping he would call me, deep down inside I knew something was wrong, that maybe this wasn't the start of something grand, but the start and finish all at once.

I hopped into the elevator and as it took me down to my floor I cried. I cried so hard that I didn't recognize my reflection in the mirrored doors. I exited the elevator and walked to my hotel door.

I prayed that my friends were still asleep and snuck in. It was still early. Surely they would still be asleep or still out, right? As I entered the room, I found it empty. For a moment I panicked thinking I missed our flight or something but noticed all of our stuff was still there.

"They must still be out," I mumbled.

I curled up in one of the beds and just cried. For what, I really couldn't tell you. Perhaps I was crying for the ending of a chapter of my life or for the beginning of a new one that was still so uncertain. As I cried myself to sleep that morning, I wondered about my life and the direction I was going, but most importantly on how I felt like I had lost something that I never even had in the first place.

**A/N**

**Ok so that's the set up. Whatcha think? Hit me! Reviews are better than Edward with morning wood. J/S.**


	2. Chapter 2 Love in this club

**A/N Hi again! Wahoo the second chapter is finally up! There are so many wonderful ladies to thank for this one! I absolutely need to thank my wonderful beta coachlady12! Without her my words would not look pretty, at all! I lubs her mucho! Check out her stories on her ff site at: .net/u/2113307/coachlady1**

**I definitely need to thank Joayla and 84Gemma both lovelies helped me hash out the plot for this story.. Without either of them or their inspiration, there would be no story to speak of so I thank them both greatly for that! I lubs them both mucho as well! **

**84Gemma has also worked on the outfits for this story. Check them out on my profile!**

**And check out Joayla's wonderful stories on her ff site at: .net/u/1927725/joayla **

**I'd also like to give a shout out to SadTomatoFF. She also read and gave me direction on this chapter. She's awesome! Read her stories at: .net/u/2160215/sadtomato**

**Well every one of my BBs (you know who you are!) has supported me with this and I lubs you all! Xox. Here goes the chapter! I hope you enjoy a second chapter that contains citrus...! **

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Not a single thing. All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of Stephenie Meyer. There is no copyright infringement intended.**

"_Let's both get undressed right here  
Keep it up girl then I swear  
I'mma give it to you non stop  
And I don't care who's watchin'  
Watchin', watchin'_

Watchin', watchin', ohh  
In this club, on the floor  
Baby's let's make love"

_Love in this club by Usher_

It was a month later and he hadn't called. Honestly, I didn't expect him to, even though a small part of me desperately wanted him to. As well as I could be, I was prepared for this outcome, especially after how things had ended between us. As I unloaded my boxes in my new apartment overlooking Seattle, my thoughts wandered back to later that unfortunate morning.

*Flashback *

_I awoke with a knot in my stomach. I wasn't sure why exactly. I looked over and saw Alice was curled up on the bed with me and Rose was sprawled out on the opposite bed. I hadn't heard them come in. I disentangled myself from Alice and took solace in a hot shower. I needed a minute to rethink the night and earlier this morning. _

_The hot spray soothed my labored muscles and I could truly feel the events from last night. Why on earth had I slept with him? And why on earth had I left him my number? I guess I really was that drunk, even this morning. I dried off and put on a fresh change of clothes, nothing fancy just a t-shirt and yoga pants. I wasn't trying to impress anybody. I threw my wet hair up in a messy bun and glanced at the clock, realizing I still had time to catch breakfast downstairs. Maybe food in my stomach would help soothe its uneasiness. I grabbed my key card and headed to the elevator. _

_My mind was foggy as I attempted to remember more events of the night before. Where had Alice and Rose disappeared to? Did I get anything from this man that I slept with? Did I even get his name? As I waited for the elevator, my mind ran through different scenarios a million miles a minute. As I was remembering one particularly hot sexcapade in his bathroom, my face instantly turned red. By looking at my blush no one in their right mind would think that I had just been thoroughly fucked by a stranger. Like I said, this wasn't like me. When the elevator arrived I didn't even look before stepping in and I slammed into something solid. _

"_Oh, sorry," I stated I looked up into familiar green eyes. _

"_No worries." A deep voice answered, but when the guy's hands on my shoulders righted me, his eyes widened with recognition. _

_I was shocked. I didn't know what to say to him. We just had this intense night, hell, an intense morning together, and it seemed odd to just say, "Hey, how are you?" Therefore, neither of us said anything at all. The tension in the elevator could have been cut with a knife. As we reached the bottom floor and the doors opened, he bolted toward the lobby, the same way I was going. He was carrying his suitcase which I hadn't noticed before. I stood there momentarily bewildered at the events unfolding around me. I gradually exited behind him not sure of what to do. Do I say something? "Hi. Thanks for last night. It was great. Please call?"As I was contemplating my next move I saw him approach a large, loud, obnoxious, group of guys._

"_Edward! It's about fucking time you showed up! Geez, were you up fucking all night again? Your hair looks like shit!" A big dude from the group roared, grabbing him and rubbing his hair frantically. They were acting like they were ten years old. Men. _

"_Emmett, for fuck's sake lay off the goddamn hair for once!" Edward said, shoving the big guy away. He briefly glanced back in my direction and eyed me with an unknown look then turned back to his group of friends. _

"_Okay, okay, stop being a pussy, man. Let's mosey."_

_I was stunned, just standing in place. Had he said, "Yet another night of fucking"?Really? Was that what he was doing here in Vegas? My stomach twisted again just like it did this morning and I felt this overwhelming sensation that I was going to be sick. My hand instantaneously went to my stomach and with my other hand, I held myself up against the wall. My face turned as white as a ghost. His group started to move away from me and I couldn't hear them as well as before, but what I heard next had my blood run cold._

_"Dude, Edward...man… what the hell… really…married soon you know… need to grow up… stop acting like a dick." What was this, his bachelor party? That was all I needed to hear. I ran to the lobby bathroom off to the right and hurled what little was left in my stomach. He'd slept with more than just me on this trip that was probably no more than a handful of days at least, and on top of that he was getting married! And soon! After hurling the contents of stomach, I exited the stall and looked in the mirror. I didn't recognize myself. I definitely didn't do stuff like this, but here I was, apparently a home-wrecking whore. Great._

I settled onto my new couch in my new apartment with a good book and wine. Most of my boxes were unpacked and I was relishing in the fact that I finally had a place to call my own. Also, I was back to my roots. My dad, Charlie, didn't live that far away and I'd missed him terribly. I was happy that I no longer lived across the country. I'd have to visit him the coming up weekend.

As I sat and sipped my wine, reading my book, my cell phone rang. I recognized the ring immediately. Alice. I looked at the clock and saw that it was almost eleven. I jumped off the couch and headed toward the phone. I fished it out of my black hole of a purse but managed to answer on the third ring.

"Hello, Alice, what can I do for you this fine evening?" Ohhh I guess I was already feeling pretty good. I grasped onto the counter to steady myself as a swayed slightly.

"Bella, why'd it take you so long to answer the phone?" she screeched into my ear.

"Hi! Nice to hear from you too! And, whatever, Alice. I answered on the third ring. By the way why are you calling so late? Is everything alright?" Suddenly I became panicked and thought something was terribly wrong.

"Can't a girl call her friend?" she whined. I knew that whine. Alice wanted something.

"Okay, cut the bullshit, Alice. What is it that you want?" She pretended to be offended that I would accuse her of wanting something, but I politely reminded her that I had known her since kindergarten so she couldn't get away with that type of excuse.

"Okay, you caught me. I know you're unpacking, but it's Friday night and I want to go out with my girls! Please, Bella! Please! Besides you never know, you might meet another handsome stranger, right?" she snickered.

Yes, I'd told Alice and Rose all about my night of fun and debauchery with whom they now lovingly referred to as "the asshole, yet handsome stranger." I'd told them the whole story right after I'd come back to the room in a sobbing mess. I'd foregone breakfast altogether after I threw up in the bathroom and cried on the floor. Not a pretty sight and I'm sure if anyone had entered at that moment they would have thought I had lost my mind. I contemplated going out. I was already drinking and it _was_ technically my first weekend here. Plus I hadn't gone out since Vegas so I might as well have some fun. Why not, right?

"Ok, Alice. Let's go. You call Rose and I'll dig through my boxes of clothes to find something decent to wear and no, no handsome, strange men, especially of the asshole variety. It'll be just me and my girls tonight." All I heard on the other end of the line was Alice squealing.

I hung up the phone and dug through my boxes. I finally found a jean skirt and a simple black tank. I pulled on my black boots and threw on a silver chain. Hey, I cleaned up nicely. Alice would be proud. I grabbed my black bag and threw in my essentials then headed downstairs. The girls were already downstairs waiting for me in a cab.

"Ohhh, look at you, doll face!" Rose shouted. Alice beamed. Alice was wearing skinny jeans, a cute beige top with a black tie in the front and beige shoes. Rose of course was wearing red, her signature color. Her shirt left little to the imagination as it dipped down low and tied, showing off her toned midsection. I wasn't sure how she could sit down in her jeans, they looked so tight, and her shoes were at least four inches high and, of course, red. She really could be a supermodel. They both could.

We arrived at club Twilight a little before midnight and the place was packed. We had no problems getting in and getting a table, however, because Rose apparently knew the owner. I had just moved back to this state after being gone seven years for college and law school in Florida; therefore, I barely knew the good clubs or anybody for that matter, except my girls, of course. I'd visited, though, but mostly to Forks to visit my dad on holidays and my girls visited me. I was so glad we'd stayed close even through the distance. We ordered our drinks and started gossiping away.

"So, you start Monday, right?" Rose questioned. I nodded sipping on my mango and cranberry martini.

"What exactly is it you'll be doing again?" Alice asked. I loved Alice, but I swear I had told her time and time again about what my job entailed.

"I'm working with the director of Human Resources as a HR manager. I will be assisting the attorneys with their potential human resource needs. My specific job will be redesigning the employee handbook and realigning the staffing design for the firm and I cannot wait! I'll be the sole one working on it and _my_ opinions will actually matter, not just those of my boss!" I had some tough times in Florida before my move with a boss of mine, and I was glad to finally spread my wings and do this on my own. It was going to be brilliant.

"Oh, yeah, that's right," Alice said.

I looked around the club and loved the décor. It was mostly blue and red tones. It felt very modern, very sexy; it almost reminded me of Vegas. Before my mind could wander to that night Rose chimed in.

"So, do you like your new apartment?" she shouted above the music.

We continued to discuss my new job and apartment and then the newly found love life between Alice and her new man. Apparently, it was someone she had met in Vegas at her dentist convention that lived right here in Seattle. As we talked and laughed, we got increasingly drunker and drunker.

"Hey, Alice!" I slurred later on. "When _are_ we going to meet this new beau of yours, anyway?" Alice looked instantly guilty.

"Well, he was supposed to be here tonight, but I'm not sure where he is." She looked off toward the entrance. So that's why she so desperately wanted us to go out with her, it made sense. I really did want to meet this man she'd been raving about for the past month. Apparently, he was also a dentist in the Seattle area, young like her, and gorgeous. Alice had great taste in men and from what I've heard he's right on par with her standards. He hadn't even tried to sleep with her yet. Told her he wanted to take it slow.

Before I knew it, we were up and dancing, bumping and grinding on each other. Apparently, I was feeling good, really good because I don't normally dance unless I'm drunk. At one point after numerous sexy dance moves and many ogling eyes from the male patrons, I left the girls and headed to the bathroom. Once you break the seal it's hard to stop. I entered the bathroom and did my business. I was at the sink touching up my make up when I heard two girls down the vanity talking.

"Oh, my God, did you see that fine piece of man specimen that just walked in a few minutes ago?" one of the blonds asked.

"I did. Oh, my God, I'm so going for him. Did you see his friend too? Maybe I'll go for both."

The other blond giggled. I gave them the side eye and continued to touch up. I put everything back in my bag and headed out back to my friends.

As I rounded the corner back toward the dance floor, I looked down to check the time on my cell phone. I couldn't stay out too much longer. I still had a lot to accomplish before work on Monday. As I was contemplating getting another drink or just heading home, I ran directly into something hard.

"Sorry," I said, looking up. There again were those familiar green eyes. My breath halted and my face paled.

"No worries," he said, staring down at me, his hands going from my shoulders to resting on my hips. I instantly looked down at my feet. How did I keep running into this man, literally? I had to get away and fast. I started to walk away when his grip tightened around me.

"You know, we need to stop running into each other like this." He smiled a sexy, crooked smile.

Immediately, I was wet and wanted him desperately, but I knew I shouldn't. I couldn't. Especially not after witnessing what I did in the lobby in Vegas and having the knowledge that he was an engaged man soon to be married, apparently. I briefly glanced at his ring finger on his left hand finding it bare and then looked up into his eyes again. I found myself lost in a sea of jade. How hypnotizing his eyes were.

"Mmmm, we probably should," I finally replied. I turned in his arms and started walking away, fully intending on him letting me go, but instead he grabbed my waist harder and started pulling me toward the back of the club near the fire exit. The only light was from the glow of the exit sign above our heads. It was essentially dark though I could still see his face and it was secluded. It was sexy. The air around us suddenly charged with this unknown electricity flowing between us.

"Why don't you talk to me?" he asked. "Not in the elevator, nor here. You were about to just walk away."

I was momentarily confused. Me not talk to him? Was he mad or high?

"What are you talking about? You're the one who didn't call me, remember?" I stated matter of factly shoving him slightly in a futile attempt to get around him. His brow furrowed and he looked deep in thought.

"I didn't have your number to call you," he said, gripping me harder and pulling me closer as I tried pushing him away.

"But I left it on the side table next to the couch before I left that morning…" I trailed off. I was trying to remember back to that moment. I specifically remembered I placed it on the table next to the phone. Didn't I?

"Well, I didn't get it if you did," he said.

I looked away, suddenly embarrassed. Is that why he didn't call? Because he didn't get my number from where I left it? I'd been mad at him all this time and he didn't even have my number anyway. I groaned inwardly. Then I remembered back to the lobby incident. No, he probably got my number and didn't call because of his fiancé that was waiting for him at home. I looked into his eyes and the look instantly debilitated my communication abilities. He glared down at me with such intensity that I swear I could have melted on site. His eyes were on fire. It felt as though he had put my body and soul onto hot embers and each of my nerves were burning individually yet simultaneously with the lust that was radiating from him.

He leaned in and captured my lips. His lips were just as I remembered, soft and succulent. His tongue swept across my bottom lip asking for entrance. Slowly but steadily, his tongue entered my mouth. Our tongues massaged each other and played for dominance in the kiss. His hands cupped my face and my hand immediately went around his neck and into his hair. I tugged lightly on his locks and he groaned slightly.

At that moment I lost all my resolve. His hands drifted from my face to my ass where he deftly kneaded my backside. Normally, this wouldn't turn me on, but something about this man ignited every nerve ending in my body. Our kisses were frenzied and left my mouth swollen with their intensity. As I turned my head away to gain some perspective his hands went to the bottom of my buttocks and under my skirt, lightly tracing my cheek. He groaned again when he realized I was wearing a thong. His kisses trailed to my neck and the hollow of my ear, the spot that caused me to arch my back and essentially purr against him. My nipples were instantly hard and very noticeable through the thin fabric of my tank, my bra doing nothing to disguise them. He noticed immediately and brought one left hand up to pinch and twist the bud through the fabric while his other still tended to my backside. The feeling was indescribable.

Soon, my skirt was hiked up around my midsection and his hands were both back down, one grasping my ass the other trailing the front edge of my thong. His fingers pushed aside the fabric slightly and dipped in and swiped over the spot that needed contact the most. I cried out in ecstasy, my body begging him to do it again and again. His fingers circled back down to my entrance and barely entered. He did this maneuver over and over again while his lips and teeth began to assault my nipples through my shirt. I cried out wanting desperately to feel him, to feel any friction at all, but he wouldn't budge. My thong was thoroughly soaked and my nipples were taut. I grabbed his head by his hair and forced his lips back up to mine. I needed more intensity. If we were doing this, we were doing this right and I was taking control.

As I sucked on his tongue, my back was firmly pressed against the wall and I brought my legs up around his waist. Both his hands instantly went to my ass to hold me up while my hands remained rooted in his hair. His package was finally right where I wanted it. I could feel his hard dick against me. His right hand left my back side and went yet again to my core. A moan erupted from him when he felt the extra moisture that was pooling there for him. I was panting heavily as his fingers began to slowly circle my clit. After a few circles and a few moans and whimpers from me my thong was pushed to the side and his fingers finally slipped into my center. I cried out under him, shivering slightly with want for him. I already knew the pleasure this man could bring and I craved it.

He started kissing my neck again and rocking me back and forth, putting enough pressure right where I wanted it with his thumb. His fingers entered me gradually and then exited and then entered again this time scooping upwards right into the spot that makes me scream. As his fingers worked their magic against my g-spot, I could feel my orgasm approaching fast. He did these motions a few more times and I grabbed onto him tighter as a wave of my orgasm crashed into me with such violence that my vision was momentarily blurred. What was with this man and the orgasms he gave? Not that I was complaining.

He continued to pump his fingers into me as my vision began to clear and my breathing slowed. Without further ado I heard a familiar zipping noise and felt his tip at my entrance. I whimpered out of lust for him. My body ached to finally be consumed by him. I looked into his eyes finding them asking for permission. I nodded slightly because words failed me at that moment.

He entered me unhurriedly, sighing upon fully being sheathed inside of me. He rocked us slowly again, building up a rhythm, and getting me accustomed to his girth and then he began to speed up. As he thrust into me at a speed that had me vibrating with desire, I felt another orgasmic wave approaching. As I crashed over the edge yet again I heard him come right along with me. He let out a loud guttural growl and an, "Oh shit," fell from his lips.

We stayed there just like that for several minutes, my skirt around my mid section, my legs around his waist, his forehead lying against my chest, and my chin atop his head. As I was trying to find my bearings and figure out what had just happened to me, I heard some commotion from behind us. My back was against the wall and my vision was blocked by his tousled hair so I couldn't see who or what it was. My settings were off and my body was numb with orgasm elation. That's when a voice broke through loud and clear. I was suddenly struck with the reality that I had just been fucked against a wall in a club… with an audience watching. So much for not being _that _girl.

**A/N Leave me love or "constructive" criticism in a review! Reviews are better than Edward's hot sexing against the wall!**


	3. Chapter 3 You make me sick

**A/N Hell! Here's the 3rd chapter! It's a little angsty but I promise it'll be worth it!**

**There are so many wonderful ladies to thank for this one! I absolutely need to thank my wonderful beta coachlady12! Without her my words would not look pretty, at all! I lubs her mucho! Check out her stories on her ff site at: .net/u/2113307/coachlady1**

**I definitely need to thank Joayla and 84Gemma both lovelies helped me hash out the plot for this story.. Without either of them or their inspiration, there would be no story to speak of so I thank them both greatly for that! I lubs them both mucho as well! **

**84Gemma has also worked on the outfits for this story. Check them out on my profile!**

**And check out Joayla's wonderful stories on her ff site at: .net/u/1927725/joayla **

**I'd also like to give a shout out to SadTomatoFF. She also read and gave me direction on this chapter. She's awesome! Read her stories at: .net/u/2160215/sadtomato**

**Well every one of my BBs (you know who you are!) has supported me with this and I lubs you all! Xox. Here goes the chapter! I hope you enjoy a second chapter that contains citrus...! **

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Not a single thing. All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of Stephenie Meyer. There is no copyright infringement intended.**

_You make me sick  
I want you and I'm hatin' it  
Got me lit like a candlestick  
Get too hot when you touch the tip,  
I'm feelin' it, I gotta getta grip  
And it's drivin me crazy  
baby don't you quit  
Can't get enough of it  
You got me goin' again  
Baby, you got me goin' again  
You make me sick…_

_You make me sick by Pink_

"Edward! What the fuck man?" I heard someone say from behind us. Edward turned his head to look at whoever was speaking to him.

"Em, give me a moment," he stated turning back to look at me.

"No way, dude. Get your shit together. We need to go before we get kicked out again." Were they really having this conversation while he was still inside of me?

"I'm sorry," he mumbled. He leaned forward and kissed me sincerely on the cheek and quickly buttoned himself up. As he was leaving, he looked back and an unknown expression crossed his face and then he was gone. I couldn't believe he'd just left.

What the fuck just happened?

I fixed myself up and headed to find my friends. I was about to have a meltdown in the club. Yes, I was a strong woman, but I couldn't deal with this right now. I was a willing participant, yes, but I seriously didn't think he'd fuck me then leave. In all honesty, I'm not really sure what I expected, but it certainly wasn't that. Maybe an exchange of phone numbers? Or a, "Hey, we've fucked twice now; can I have your phone number?" Or an attempt at a conversation, perhaps? But definitely not a fuck and duck.

I searched around the crowded bar for my friends. I was trying desperately to keep the tears from coming while being surrounded by random strangers. Finally, I spotted Rose in the corner on her cell. I raced over to her just as she was hanging up. She looked at me and instantly knew something was wrong.

"Oh, my God, Bella! What's wrong? What happened?"

"Fuck and duck," was all that I could manage to say before sobs wracked my body.

"Holy shit." She slapped a twenty on the counter and waved to get the bartender's attention, mouthing for him to keep the change. She grabbed my arm, pulling me toward the back of the club to the exit. I couldn't help but cry harder as we passed the scene of the incident.

"I'm going to kill Alice," she stated matter-of-factly. I looked over at her for an explanation as we waited for a cab.

"Her boy toy arrived with his friends and then all of a sudden they all left. Alice went with him asking me to stay behind with you. I didn't even get to meet the guy. She actually disappeared first then called to tell me she'd already left." That must have been who she'd been talking to on the phone. I continued to cry into her shoulder as we climbed into a cab and made our way to her apartment. She thought it'd be better for me to go home with her and I couldn't have agreed more. She didn't ask questions, she just let me cry. I'm sure the cab driver was absolutely mortified of the crazy crying girl in his backseat but I couldn't care less.

She helped me upstairs and out of my clothes. At this point in our friendship we were comfortable enough around each other not to care. I changed into a t-shirt and shorts and crawled into her bed. I didn't want to sleep alone. Sensing this, Rose didn't question me. She let me curl up in her bed as she climbed in beside me and we slept.

I awoke the next morning and glanced at the clock. It was only eight. Rose was long gone on her run. She ran seven miles every morning. Normally, I'd be up doing yoga or running as well. It was my escape from reality but I didn't have anything with me to accomplish either. I headed out to Rose's balcony in an attempt to clear my head.

I just couldn't believe what happened. What an asshole. Okay, so I'd left him in Vegas, true, but that was different. Wasn't it? Yes, that was different. I at least attempted to make contact with him by leaving my number. A number he apparently never got, but I still tried and that counted. He could have asked for my number before he bolted or even asked me to come outside with him. Something besides what was done.

Oh, my God. What if that was planned? What if that was something he and his friends did frequently? Find a girl, fuck her, and then make an excuse to leave. Memories of Vegas came flooding back.

"_Geez, were you up fucking all night again?"_

The more I thought about it the angrier I got. Who the fuck did he think he was? Did he think he could just go around doing this to women? Yes, he was good looking and he was definitely good at what he did, but that didn't give him a right to treat me like a doormat. Now, I really wished I had my running gear. I needed to clear my mind and sitting here wasn't helping no matter how beautiful the view. If Edward walked in the door right now he'd be minus one member that's for sure.

I heard Rose come back in so I made my way to the living room. We discussed the night before over coffee and chocolate chip pancakes. She knew exactly how to cheer me up. After I explained everything, Rose was surprisingly optimistic. Usually, she'd be the one ready for a war and Alice would be the one sitting here being optimistic stating it was merely a coincidence.

"I don't know, Bella. It just seems too coincidental that you'd end up in the same club. And if he was there lurking for women as you said then why wouldn't he pick a random stranger?" She had a point.

"I don't know, Rose. Nothing about this whole situation makes any sense." It really didn't and now my head hurt thinking about it. This was exactly what I didn't need right now. I was trying to start fresh, begin again, and here I was already letting a man ruin it. Soon after breakfast Rose drove me home.

I spent the rest of the weekend unpacking and setting up my apartment. I thought about the night before a few more times and decided there wasn't anything I could do. The past was the past. I'd enjoyed myself more than I had in a while, well, ever since Vegas, so I was going to stick with that and move on. I'd start fresh from here on. I was definitely not going back to that club; that was for sure. Seattle was a large city so the chances of running into him again anytime soon were slim to none.

Monday came faster than I wanted. I still had a lot I wanted to accomplish around my apartment, like buy a new bed, and I was secretly berating myself for agreeing to work so soon after moving. I knew I should have asked for more time off, but the truth of the matter was I needed the money. Those student loans wouldn't pay themselves. So, here I was sucking it up. It was time to put on my big girl panties and join the real world.

I put on a white corset-looking top and a black skirt adding to my ensemble my favorite necklace. I put on my fiercest heels, grabbed my suitcase and iPhone and headed out. I felt like a grown up and I was scared shitless. I wasn't sure if I could play this role.

I pulled into the parking garage at work and parked in my designated parking spot. Angela had made it clear on the phone that parking was assigned and people were vicious about their spots. I walked the distance to the elevator passing expensive car after expensive car.

I headed up to the fifteenth floor as Angela had instructed. The office was absolutely gorgeous. All the walls were made of glass and the seats were red leather. There was vase filled with yellow daises and the whole room just felt welcoming. I walked up to the receptionist to introduce myself.

"Hi, I'm Bella Swan. I'm here to see Angela Webber." The blonde looked at me as if I had three heads. What was her deal? So I tried a different route.

"Can you please inform Ms. Webber that I'm here for our meeting?" She looked back down at her magazine about the latest celebrity gossip.

"Ms. Webber isn't here today," she stated plainly. Oh, this girl was going to be a pill, I could already tell.

"Look, ummm," I looked around for her name and finally found her name plate, "Jessica, I'm the new manager for HR and I have a meeting with Ms. Webber. If she's not here then find out who it is that I need to speak with in her absence or I might have to reconsider your position as the receptionist when I redesign the staffing method I've been assigned to." After a moment Jessica sighed and rolled her eyes at me but got on the phone.

I took a seat in one of the comfortable chairs and flipped through a random magazine that someone had discarded on the table, not caring at all about its contents. I couldn't believe this girl. Who did she think she was? Okay, so I probably couldn't get rid of her job, but she didn't need to know that. A few moments later Jessica spoke up.

"Mr. Cullen will be down in a few moments but he said to go ahead and show you to your office." She stood up and started walking down the hallway. Well, the attitude was still there but at least she was doing something semi-productive. She walked into an office at the end of the hallway that held a magnificent view of the Seattle skyline. I couldn't believe it was mine. Jessica just stood in the doorway looking dumbfounded. Apparently, she couldn't believe it either.

"That'll be all, Jessica. Thank you," I said, turning around to look at her stunned face. I wanted to add "enjoy your view of the elevator doors, by the way" but thought against it. I didn't want to have a complaint filed against me on my first day. I knew how the system worked. Jessica huffed but turned around and left without another word.

I started organizing my desk and taking inventory on things that I needed to order or bring. I put pictures of my friends and family on my bookshelf and seriously considered moving my desk to face the window. It seemed a shame to waste such a beautiful view. As I rationalized the move I heard a knock on the door. I couldn't believe I actually had a door. I'd gone from cubicle to office with a view. I told whomever it was to come in as I pushed a filing cabinet over a few inches. Yes, I was into fung shui.

As I pondered the new placement of my office furniture, I heard a scuffle and gasp from behind me. I turned to observe my visitor and was stunned at who I saw. Edward. Figures.

"Ummmm," he looked down at the file he was holding in his hands then looked back up at me. "Isabella Swan?" he asked cautiously like my name would somehow cut him when he uttered it.

"I go by Bella," I said holding my hand out to his. I was going to be professional about this. I had to be. This was my chance at a career I loved. I couldn't storm out like a child, stomping my feet and having a tantrum. I'd worked too long and too hard and I wasn't going to let him ruin this for me. I was going to stick to my guns and push past this.

"Bella," he mumbled back taking my hand in his. This simple gesture sent chills down my spine. I'd already had sex with this man but somehow this simple action felt more intimate.

"I'm sorry, but Angela is out for personal reasons. I'm not sure when she'll be back so I'll be taking over for her and showing you around."

"Okay," I simply said; the less talking the better. I was trying desperately to keep my emotions in check. I really didn't want to end my first day with dismembering a coworker no matter how much he deserved it. He showed me around the office, introducing me to everyone. He explained where the bathrooms were and emergency exits, just in case, he said. He illustrated how to order things I would need for my office and he even went so far as to show me where the mail went. It was exhausting. A few times during our office "tour" I caught him staring at me. Uncomfortable with his gazing, I pretended not to see it and ignored him.

Finally, it was time for lunch. I grabbed my purse from my office and headed out. Edward had excused himself to take a phone call so I took the opportunity to leave. Unfortunately, Edward caught up with me by the elevators.

"Bella, wait up." I turned to see Edward sprinting down the hall toward me.

"I thought we could do lunch and talk logistics. My treat." He smiled a crooked smile and I almost melted. Before I could respond with "thanks but no thanks," Jessica chimed in.

"But, Mr. Cullen, you have a lunch meeting with Mr. Yorkie about his upcoming custody battle at Florentine's in half an hour." Edward looked over at Jessica and nodded his head slightly.

"I almost forgot. Thank you for reminding me, Jessica."

"Anytime, Mr. Cullen," she purred looking at him like he was her next meal. Was she serious?

"Well, another time then, Bella?" He grabbed my hand and kissed it softly.

"Sure." I nodded though I knew it was a lie. Edward stared at me for a moment longer but then turned and headed back down the hallway. At that moment the elevator arrived. As I walked toward the open doors, Jessica decided to chime in again.

"You know he'll never go for someone like you, right?" Was this bitch really serious? I stopped the door from closing with my foot.

"Excuse me?" I asked.

"What? I saw the way you were ogling him, but trust me. Mr. Cullen doesn't go for your type." She scoffed as if it was the worst thing imaginable.

"Jessica, I'd like to advise you to choose your words carefully. You are discussing a coworker's private affairs here and in an office setting that is highly inappropriate." I _was_ intrigued, however. I wanted to know the dirt she knew, but I was trying to remain professional, _trying_ being the operative word.

"Whatever. All I'm saying is I've seen his conquests and they look nothing like you. Let's not get all defensive," she huffed, waving her hands with her fake plastic nails in my direction.

"Jessica, this will be your verbal warning. If I hear you discussing his personal affairs again or anyone else's, for that matter, I _will _write you up. And don't forget that next week I'm going through our staffing list and eliminating those positions I feel are unnecessary."

"Is that a threat?" she screeched.

"No, it's a fact, Ms. Stanley. Clean up your act and maybe I'll reconsider. Until then I'd at least mind your P's and Q's, especially when Mr. Cullen's office is right down the hall, and you're discussing his sexual conquests with someone you just met who, by the way, happens to be your boss, indirectly." I pointed in the direction of Edward's office and saw the change in her demeanor. I could see him pacing around on his cell phone. Jessica's face turned bright red when she realized the conversation we'd just had, with him being a mere hundred feet away.

"Have a good lunch, Jessica." I let the doors close behind me. I tried not to let her words affect me but I was failing miserably. I wanted to know that if I wasn't his type, then who was. Is that why he'd done what he did the other night at the club? I really wished I could've had lunch with the girls to pow-wow about this, but, unfortunately, both of them were busy. Sigh. I wasn't sure I could do this, but I had to try. I wasn't giving up my new job that easily.

I managed to avoid Edward the rest of the week, claiming that I had too much work to do to stop and have lunch with him but always promised we'd get together sometime soon. I wasn't sure how long he'd keep asking and I wasn't sure how long I could keep denying him. It seemed futile.

He inquired about lunch just like clockwork. He showed up every day right around noon to ask me about my day and about lunch, and every day I explained how busy I was, and, no I couldn't do lunch but maybe another time. On a positive note, in the last week I managed to get a lot of work done. I was proud of myself.

As noon approached, I waited for Edward to arrive. As much as I tried to avoid it happening, I looked forward to our chats even if they were only a few minutes long. Fifteen minutes went by and still no sign of Edward. Maybe he'd finally given up?

I grabbed my items and left my office with a heavy heart. I tried desperately to swallow my disappointment. As I walked down the hallway, I noticed the door to Angela's office was open. That was strange. It was closed earlier and I knew she was still out. As I approached, I could hear people having a conversation inside. I peeked around the corner to observe what was going on.

That's when I saw him with her. Angela was smiling up at Edward as he put his hand on her swollen stomach. His face contained pure joy.

"He's going to be strong just like his daddy," Angela stated.

Oh, my God. This was the other woman. I felt absolutely sick to my stomach. How the hell was this supposed to work? I worked with this random guy who'd fucked me twice, well, more than twice, _and_ his fiancé who was also currently pregnant with his child. I didn't sign up for a soap-opera life and I didn't want it. I'd left Florida specifically because there was too much drama, only to find it following me here. I contemplated heading back to my office. Instead, I attempted to walk past her office unnoticed, praying to whatever god that if he could just make me invisible this one time I would be forever thankful. No such luck.

"You must be Bella!" Angela squeaked. She came around the corner of her desk to shake my hand, brushing past a shocked Edward.

"It's so nice to meet you finally!"

"Yes, likewise." I half-smiled.

"I'm sorry I haven't been here to show you around but I've heard that my partner here has taken good care of you right?" I looked at him. Partner, huh? Yeah, he's taken good care of me. If only she knew.

"Yes, yes, he has." I swallowed the lump in my throat. I wanted to get out of there and fast so I could think.

"Well, I'll be out a little while longer. I've had some personal things come up that I needed to take care of, but I'll be back soon and we'll catch up." There was sadness in her eyes. I could tell whatever personal problems she was going through were taking their toll on her.

"Okay, that would be great," I said. "I hope everything works out for you and I'll see you when you get back. Take care." I let go of her hand and bolted toward the elevator. I couldn't breathe. I suddenly felt like I was underwater searching frantically for air. The elevator arrived just as Edward started jogging toward me.

"Bella!" he said waving his hand, his eyes silently begging me to hold the elevator. I let the doors close on him and I found myself sobbing inside. This was too much all at once, and I couldn't wrap my head around it all, the epic sex, his soon to be marriage, his pregnant fiancé. As the lift took me down to the garage floor, I got an eerie sense of déjà vu. My memory skipped back to Vegas.

It wasn't that long ago that I was on an elevator floor in a different building far away from this one crying my eyes out over the same man. Oh, I was seriously fucked.

**A/N Let me know! Reviews build endorphins, endorphins make me happy, and happy people update sooner ;) j/k (and yes I just reference legally blond! Review if you can! *muah***


	4. Chapter 4 Cowboy Casanova

**A/N *Peaks in* Hi! Here's Chapter 4! I'm sorry it's late! RL is crazy sometimes, but I am already working on the next chapter so I hope to have that up soon! Promise! Not so much angst here just filler so just hang in there with me and you won't regret it! **

**I absolutely need to thank my wonderful beta coachlady12! She is just purely amazing and she knows just how much I love her! Check out her stories on her ff site at: 2113307/coachlady1**

**Also need to thank my pre-readers Joayla and 84Gemma! They are truly the backbone to this fic! I lubs them both mucho as well! **

**Check out on my profile for song info and the lovely polyvore that 84Gemma did for the fic! **

**And check out Joayla's wonderful stories on her ff site at: /1927725/joayla **

**Also I need to thank all of my bbs on twitter as well. You know who you are! Thanks for sending me movie suggestions and sexual positions! *wink wink* Ya'll are the greatest and I really couldn't do it without any of you guys. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Not a single thing. All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of Stephenie Meyer. There is no copyright infringement intended.**

"_Run, run away  
Don't let him mess with your mind  
He'll tell you anything you want to hear  
He'll break your heart  
It's just a matter of time  
But just remember_

He's a good-time cowboy Casanova  
Leaning up against the record machine  
He looks like a cool drink of water  
But he's candy-coated misery  
He's the devil in disguise  
A snake with blue eyes  
And he only comes out at night  
Gives you feelings that you don't want to fight  
You better run for your life"

_Cowboy Casanova by Carrie Underwood_

The elevator dinged signaling my arrival to the garage. I peeled myself off of the floor and swatted at my eyes, smoothed out my skirt attempting, to no avail, to make myself look somewhat presentable. As I turned to exit what I was now considering another emotional downturn, I ran into something solid. Déjà vu quickly flooded my mind yet again and I closed my eyes instantly, silently pleading with God that it wasn't who I thought it was. I mustered up all of my courage and slowly looked up. To my surprise ice blue eyes were staring back at me instead of jade green ones. I sighed audibly in relief.

"You alright?" the man asked, worry lacing his words, his hand resting on my shoulder. A moment passed and I realized that I hadn't said anything.

"I'm fine. Thank you." I clutched my bag closer to me. This man was cute, but something about him just gave me the chills.

"You don't look like you're fine." His hand moved to my hip. Yes, definitely creepy. I backed away and moved around him.

"No, really, I'm fine. It's just allergies," I said pointing to my eyes and sniffling, "but thank you for your concern and your kindness."

"No worries." His voice dripped with a sickening sweetness. "I'm James." He held out his hand as a gesture of friendliness. I just found it disturbing.

"Bella," I said taking his hand for a second and quickly pulling away. I wanted to get out of here and fast.

"Beautiful name for a beautiful girl." He winked. Gag. "Here, take my card. If there's anything you need, anything at all, let me know." Winking at me again, he handed me a business card, briefly touching my hand in the exchange and entered into the elevator. I glanced down at the card as the elevator doors closed behind him. James Mitchum, Attorney at Law. Interesting. I placed the card in my bag, unable to dispose of it at the moment and walked off toward my car.

As I approached my Mini Cooper and unlocked it, I heard a loud bang come from behind me that echoed throughout the garage. I turned to look in the direction of the noise to see Edward exiting the stairwell looking around frantically. Assuming it was me he was looking for I began to panic.

I couldn't confront him. I know I needed to but not now, not here. I pulled open my door and quickly slid into the leather seat. I inserted the key and the car roared to life. As I started my car, Edward looked in my direction and started to jog toward me. I had to get out of there fast. I threw my car into reverse and backed rapidly out of my spot. Edward was now close enough that I could hear him screaming my name. I threw the car into drive and sped off toward the exit.

This was not a good day.

I called in an emergency best friend summit—only supposed to be used if absolutely necessary. Alice used them more than the rest of us but she was a little dramatic at times. A lot of minor things blew up into major issues for her. I sat at our table and waited.

The spots had changed over time. For awhile it was the bean bag aisle at the local Wal-Mart or the fountain at the park. Then as we got older it became our favorite bars or restaurants. It was wherever we could meet up, just us girls, in semi-privacy. Even when I lived out of town, I was part of the summit, if only by phone.

Alice and Rose showed up soon after and I explained to them what had happened.

"Maybe she's his sister?" Alice offered.

"Really, Alice, his sister?" I sighed putting my cup down.

"I don't know. Maybe? It's possible you know." Ahh, my truly optimistic friend; I loved her, really, I did.

"I don't think so, Alice. The gesture was not to someone who was his sister. You didn't see his face. Plus, I've been going through the employee roster and I think I would have come across the fact that they're siblings somewhere down the line."

"Well, isn't it against company policy to date someone you work with?" Rose inquired, taking a sip from her coffee. I shook my head.

"No, not necessarily. As long as you don't work in the same department and one is not the other's boss, it usually isn't frowned upon." I picked my cup back up and took a long drawn-out sip. I was glad it was Friday but I still had to go back to work to finish out the rest of the day. I really didn't want to face Edward, not right now anyway, but we'd have to talk eventually. And perhaps having this talk at work would be the best place, so I could avoid throwing anything at him, but for now I just couldn't. Not today.

"I know!" Alice squealed. "Let's have a girls' night! Drinking, romance movies! What do you think?" It sounded amazing and just what I needed.

"Sounds great, Alice. Can we do it at my place though? It can be sort of a housewarming party too," I replied. Alice agreed wholeheartedly. She began discussing what she would bring and telling Rose and me what we needed to prepare, as well. Lunch was over before I knew it and I headed back to my car. Alice had already skipped off toward her job since she was within walking distance, and Rose walked with me to the parking lot.

"Don't worry, Bella. It'll all work out."

"Wait a second. Who are you and what have you done with my skeptical, tell me to 'fuck off' friend, Rose?" I looked around.

"Oh, shut up." She playfully shoved me. "I'm serious, Bella. I think there's a good reason for this and you just need to talk to him. Of course, only when you're ready. You might be surprised at what he has to say." Now I was seriously confused.

"Seriously, where is Rose?" We stopped at my car door and I turned to face her.

"I don't know. I've kind of met someone and I'm starting to believe in the whole 'love thing,' I guess, she said." I gasped. This was coming from my friend who kicked a guy's ass for looking at her wrong and dumped a guy on the side of the road for even suggesting taking her to McDonald's on a date.

"Wow. Never thought I'd see the day. Who is he and why haven't I heard about him until now?"

"It's still new and I don't want to jinx it. I haven't even told Alice yet and she'll probably kill me. I just really hope it works out. I really like him."

"When did you meet him?"

"Actually, we met in Vegas. We found out we lived in the same city and have been chatting ever since." She looked over at me sheepishly probably hoping that I wouldn't be pissed. I _was_ slightly annoyed that I didn't know my best friend had been dating someone for the past month or so and hadn't told me, but I guessed she had her reasons. Plus, I'd been so busy since then with the move and the new job, that she could have mentioned him and I might not have even noticed. I was an awful friend.

"I wish you'd told me but I completely understand. We'll have to talk about him, but not tonight. Tonight, let's get drunk and forget about stupid boys." Rose laughed and hugged me. God, I loved her hugs.

"Agreed, Bella. I'll see you tonight." She gave me a kiss on the cheek and headed toward her car.

"Bye," I said hardly above a whisper. I was happy for her but I was also extremely jealous. If this man could change Rose in this way I wondered if this was it for her. I mean we were twenty-seven. It wasn't uncommon for women our age to meet someone and settle down.

I plopped down in my driver's seat and allowed my thoughts to wander to Jake. I hoped he was doing well. Maybe I should call him and find out. No, probably not a good idea. He was happy, I was sure. Although he was a big part of my past and would always be my best guy friend, I couldn't help but feel guilty with how I'd left things between us. I sighed. Yet another thing for me to have to fix.

I drove back to the office and parked in my parking spot. I wasn't sure what car was Edward's but I looked around anyway. I really just needed to man up and deal with this. Hopefully, I could convince him to talk about this later.

I made it up to the office. As I stepped off the elevator, I fully expected the Spanish Inquisition, but nothing happened. I looked toward his office but his lights were off.

"He's in meetings for the rest of the day," piped up Jessica, a smirk crossing her face. Oh, I just wanted to smack it right off her.

"Thank you Jessica," I replied, attempting to remain professional at all costs, although I was mentally flipping her off. I'd only been here a week and there was already drama. I walked to my office and attempted to get some work done before I headed out for the weekend. I left a message on Angela's voicemail that I was calling in sick on Monday because I wasn't feeling well. I didn't have the vacation days yet, but I needed more than just two days to think this shit out. Plus, I really wasn't feeling all that well. I knew I was thinking too much.

I made my way home, stopping to pick up all that Alice said was required for girls' night. She and Rose arrived on time and we got right down to business. We laid out the chocolate and the alcohol for each of us—beer for me, liquor for Rose, and wine for Alice.

We popped in _Dirty Dancing,_ our go-to girl film, to get our night started. We drooled over Patrick Swayze and what we lovingly referred to as the "butt scene," or the scene where he got out of the bed and there was a perfect view of his ass if you paused the movie just right. We rewound it and replayed the scene over and over again.

"Okay, okay," Alice piped up through our giggles. "Favorite sexual position?" I groaned. Haven't we had this discussion before?

"Reverse cowgirl," Rose stated with confidence. Alice and I looked at her like she had three heads then we burst into giggles.

"That was quick, Rose," I noted.

"Well, when you know, you know, though 69 is pretty high on the list, too."

"Oh, my God, that's awesome!" Alice squealed. "Mine is the crab!" I didn't even want to know what that one was, mental images filling my mind.

"What about you Bella?" Rose asked. The latest sex I'd had had been the best and most of it I couldn't even remember.

"Apparently, I like it against the wall," I said seriously. We all looked at each other then burst out in loud guffaws of laughter.

We laughed and drank ourselves silly. We never talked about stupid boys or work. We just enjoyed each other's company. It was amazing and just what I needed. That was, until I woke up the next morning.

I was hugging the toilet like it was my new best friend. Any thoughts of food had my stomach twisting in knots. I could've sworn I hadn't drunk enough to cause this kind of reaction, but here I was praying to the porcelain god.

Alice said it was probably a combo of the alcohol and my nerves from what'd happened at the office. I was sure she right. She was always right. Alice and Rose left, both suffering from their own morning after fates. I spent much of my weekend attempting to get better although my stomach never fully settled. I figured I must be coming down with something because hangovers never last this long. The rest of the time I spent reading or pondering my potential conversation with Edward. What would I say? "I hate you, you bastard." "What were you thinking," etc.

There were numerous scenarios playing through my mind on what would happen. What could happen? My phone rang all weekend but I never answered it. There was nothing I had to say to anyone. I knew it wasn't Alice or Rose calling because they wouldn't bother to call; they would just come over.

I was glad that I took Monday off because I still wasn't one hundred percent and my mind was still bogged down with thoughts of the potential letdown to come. I checked my phone Monday night to find twenty-three missed calls from the same unknown number, but I didn't dare call it back, and whoever it was left no voicemails. There _was_ one call from my dad, however, that I would return tomorrow.

Tuesday came sooner than I wanted but I was as ready as I would ever be. There was just no way this conversation with Edward could go well because either way my heart would be broken. If he was with Angela, then it was obviously bad, and if he wasn't, then that would hurt too because he'd never even asked me for my phone number. Was I not good enough?

I stared at the picture on my bookshelf. It was one of Jacob and me on a rollercoaster and our faces contained pure joy. I remembered that day like it was yesterday.

*Flashback*

"_Bella, it'll be okay. I promise." I laughed at my stupidity as I held onto his hand. We were currently riding my first rollercoaster ever at Disneyworld and I was scared shitless. _

"_Just hold onto me, Bella, and everything will be alright." The ride started to move and I couldn't contain my excitement or my fear._

"_Bella, stop squashing my hand. It'll be okay." I leaned into his side and hung on as the ride dipped and weaved. At the end I let out the breath I was holding. It was exhilarating. We went to the photo booth and I waited while Jacob bought our picture that was taken. _

"_Here you go. Your first official rollercoaster memory captured." He handed over my copy of the picture. There I was grabbing onto Jacob for dear life but we both looked so happy. _

_At that moment I realized just how much I'd relied on Jacob for so many things and how truly grateful I was to have had him in my life. He reached out for my hand to drag me to the next coaster and I knew then that I'd always be safe with him no matter what happened. I just hoped that I could return the favor to him someday. Unfortunately, that someday never came for us._

*End of Flashback*

Tuesday soon became Tuesday afternoon. Around three o'clock there was a knock on my door. I sat at my desk and looked up, cautiously answering with a "Come in." I was fully expecting it to be Edward. Instead I a figure came toward me with a bouquet of lilies, my favorite flowers. I was slightly confused but then realized soon enough that it was just a delivery man with flowers for me, most likely from Edward, and the deliveryman was just trying to do his job. Really, flowers were nice but what the fuck? It felt more of a cop-out than anything, a "Here are some flowers. I'm sorry I'm a dick." Yeah, no thanks.

"Just leave them on the desk," I said to the guy, sighing as I went back to my work. The guy didn't move, however.

"I said you can just leave them and go." But there was still no movement. What the hell? I got up and walked around my desk to investigate this deliveryman closer and what the hell he was doing standing motionless in my office. There was something recognizable about his clothes, his jeans being faded and his shirt looking like it'd also seen better days. Then a familiar person's head poked around the flowers. It was the last person on Earth I thought I'd see at that moment; I would've thought of anybody else but him. I closed my eyes as I heard his voice resonate in my ears.

"Bella," he said softly. With my simple name uttered from his lips my heart began to race and then shattered simultaneously.

"Jacob," I whispered, fighting back with every fiber of my being running to him for comfort.

**A/N Ok! There ya go! Next chapter is going up hopefully sometime next week. Trying to push through the next few chapters because they'll get a little angsty but no worries I have a plan! **

**I'm also working on a schmexy outtake from Vegas… give me a holler if you guys would be interested in that! **

**Please review and leave me some love! Reviews are almost better than 69 with Edward… almost.**


	5. Chapter 5 Call it off

**LONG A/N **PLEASE READ** Hi everyone! Ok so here's chapter 5 and on time! Yay! We've got a lot more to go (Other POVS too) and the next few hopefully I can push through relatively fast. They are important chapters though so it might take longer than I or you want, but please hang in there with me! **

**This chapter might upset some of you guys... maybe. No violence or drug abuse just non B/E. Fair warning. You can skip if you want. However, remember it's a flashback and I do believe in B/E and HEA if that makes anyone feel better!**

**Thank you to my wonderful beta coachlady12! She is just wonderful and I love her! Please go check out her stories on her ff site they are amazing! 2113307/coachlady1**

**Also need to thank my pre-readers Joayla and 84Gemma! They are truly the backbone to this fic! I lubs them both mucho as well! **

**Check out on my profile for song info and the lovely polyvore that 84Gemma did for the fic! **

**And check out Joayla's wonderful stories on her ff site at: /1927725/joayla **

**Also check out the banner that the talented rosalynn7885 made on the profile!**

**I need to thank all of my bbs on twitter as well. Cherieblossum and SadTomatoff especially for helping me out! Check out their fics on their sites: cherieblossum and sadtomato!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Not a single thing. All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of Stephenie Meyer. There is no copyright infringement intended.**

"_I won't regret saying this  
This thing  
That I'm saying  
Is it better than  
Keeping my mouth shut  
That goes without saying  
Call, break it off  
Call, break my own heart _

_Maybe I would have been  
Something you'd be good at  
Maybe you would have been  
Something I'd be good at _

_But now we'll never know  
I won't be sad  
But in case  
I'll go there  
Everyday,  
To make myself feel bad  
There's a chance  
I'll start to wonder  
If this was the thing to do" _

"_Call it off" by Tegan and Sara_

Jacob.

"Jacob? What are you doing here?" I asked surprised that I was staring at the person that I'd just been thinking about.

"I'm here to visit you. Can't a friend visit a friend?" He smiled at me sweetly. My heart broke a little knowing that I put that smile there but I couldn't be the one to keep it there.

"Jake, how'd you know where I worked?"

"It's a little untapped resource known as my dad. You know our dads gossip like women. By the way, my dad says "hi" and you need to stop by sometime soon. He also says you haven't called your dad in awhile." Crap. I did need to call him back. Maybe I could go visit him this weekend.

"I appreciate the message but couldn't you have called first to let me know you were dropping by or even in town?"

"It wouldn't be considered a surprise if I had called you first." His smile grew bigger "Where do you want the flowers?"

"Right. Sorry. Over here is fine," I said pointing toward the other side of my desk, the only part still free from clutter. "So, how long are you in town then?"

He snickered. "Bella, you really need to call your dad more often." I looked at him confused as he continued. "I'm actually moving back. I'm going to help my dad out and start up my own shop."

"That's great, Jake. That's really great." And I meant it. Although we hadn't talked in over seven weeks and our last conversation had been less than desirable, I still considered him one of my best friends. He'd been the one that wanted to take it to the next level.

_*Flashback*_

"_Bella, where are you?" he asked exasperated. _

"_I'm at Eclipse, the new bar downtown, why?" I screamed drunkenly into my phone. _

"_Because we were supposed to meet up for dinner and you never showed." Jake sounded pissed. _

"_Sorry, Jake! I completely forgot. Emily really wanted to go out to celebrate graduating and I couldn't turn her down!" _

"_Well, why didn't you at least call or answer when I called? I sat at the restaurant looking like a fool for an hour, Bella!" So, that's why he'd called so many times earlier. _

"_Look, Jake, I said I was sorry. We'll get together tomorrow or something and I'll make it up to you. I promise but I really got to go now. Bye!"I went back to the bar and got another gin and tonic with double lime. I was soon approached by a random guy. _

"_Hey," he said nodding in my direction. I nodded back. He was pretty cute. "Want to dance?" I shrugged. I didn't really dance but I did when I drank. He led me out to the dance floor. We danced to the songs that came on and he was a pretty good dancer. I was contemplating my next move with him when I felt a tap on my shoulder. I looked over to see Jacob glaring at me. What the fuck. _

"_May I cut in?" Gah. Really?_

"_No," I said and turned back to What's His Face. Jacob grabbed a hold of my arm and started to pull me off in the direction of the exit._

"_Jacob, what the fuck are you doing?" I screeched trying desperately to withdraw my arm from his grasp. _

"_Taking you home," was his simple reply._

"_I don't want to go home! I was having fun." Finally, I wrenched my arm free and glared at him. "Really, Jake, was that necessary? I'm not your whore that you can just grab whenever the fuck you feel like it!" I spat._

"_Bella, you're not my whore but you _are _acting like one. He had his hands all over you!"_

"_Well, maybe I wanted his hands all over me! Did you ever think of that?" He grew silent. Apparently he hadn't. Finally, he spoke just above a whisper. _

"_I just didn't like the way he was touching you okay?" and with that I turned to leave. "Go away, Jake. I'll call you tomorrow." I continued walking on. Fuck, it was cold out. I shivered._

"_Wait. I'm sorry okay! I just… I just freaked out when you didn't respond to my texts or calls. Especially when we had plans and you bailed. Then I come in and the guy looks like he's molesting you so of course I intervened. I do like your father, Bella, and I want to remain on his good side!"_

"_Don't bring him into this! You didn't have to go all caveman on me. We aren't together! You don't own me and for your information I can take care of myself." I said stopping and turning toward him._

"_Yeah, sure looked like it," he mumbled. Did I mention that not only do I get horny when I drink but violent? I turned around and shoved Jake as hard as I could which sent him barreling backwards. _

"_You don't get to talk to me like that, asshole. You know I can take care of myself or do I need to give you a demonstration." I held out my keys for him to see. I held my car key between my pointer and middle finger; it was the perfect weapon. They say that anything is a weapon if it's held right. _

"_I said I was sorry, Bella. Can you at least let me drive you home? I do respect Charlie and I'd love to not have to call him to tell him you had an accident that I could have prevented by not letting you drink and drive." Sigh. He was right even though I didn't want to admit it._

_I handed him my keys and we were soon on our way to my apartment. I texted Emily to let her know I had gone home and to let me know her status. Her non-existent reply indicated her occupancy somewhere else. She was probably with that hot blond that had her pressed up against the mirrored wall earlier. I sighed out of jealousy. It had been so long for me. I couldn't even remember the last time. _

_We arrived at my apartment and Jake settled on my couch as I prowled the fridge for food. I always ate too much when I drank. Now, I was wishing we had stopped for cheese fries or something along the way. Maybe it wasn't too late? Eh, whatever. I shut the door and went to grab a bag of chips from the cabinet. Chips were good. No cooking involved was always a win. I sat down beside Jake on the sofa and began to stuff my face. _

"_I don't know how you stay so skinny eating all that crap all the time," he said, staring at the TV and flipping through the channels. _

"_Whatever," I mumbled with a mouth full of chips. "By the way what are you doing here anyways? Don't you have a someplace else to be?" I stated, suddenly annoyed that he was here and still pissed at what he had done at the club. I'm pretty sure I could have gotten laid tonight and I really needed to get laid, bad. _

"_You left me hanging for dinner, Bells, so I decided you can make it up to me by hanging out with me now." He smiled over at me. For as much as I loved him I truly hated him sometimes. _

"_Jake, I'm going to bed. You know where the door is. Good night." I huffed standing up and headed toward my bedroom leaving the bag of chips behind. I'd get them tomorrow. I entered my room and fell onto my bed. I was too tired to think of taking my clothes off. Just as I decided that I should probably at least take my shoes off, I saw Jacob standing in my doorway. _

"_Jacob, what the fuck? Did you forget where the exit door was?" I sat up on the bed to look at him better, both of him. _

"_Bella, I don't want to go home right now. It's three a.m. and I don't want to wait for a cab. You know they'll be backed up and I won't get home for another hour or so." I looked over at the clock._

"_Jake, you can do whatever you want but I'm going to bed." I lay back down and closed my eyes. There was a shift of the mattress and I looked over to see Jake sitting on the edge staring at me expectantly. I just stared back unsure of what to say or do. "You do realize there's a perfectly good couch in the living room?" _

"_Yeah, but I don't know when your roommate's coming home," he paused, "or with whom." He had a point. _

"_Sleep," I pointed to the other side. He lay down next to me with a huge goofy grin. _

"_Wipe that grin off your face. You might have won the battle but I'll win the war." _

"_I have no doubt about that, Bella." I rolled over and away from him, but just as I was drifting off to sleep I felt his warm hand rest on my waist. It was an odd feeling but nice at the same time. I stayed there relishing in the feel of his hand on my hip when said hand started to move. I was momentarily stunned. Was Jake trying to cop a feel while I was asleep? _

"_Bella, I know you're awake. You're the worst faker." _

"_Mmmmm," I hummed unsure of what to say. His hands continued their ministrations on my side before moving higher. I couldn't breathe and not in a good way. I was shocked; however, at the same time I didn't move to stop him. Jake and I had fooled around before but never took it to another level. It always felt too weird. Tonight I was just the right amount of drunk and horny that I couldn't bring myself to care. _

_His hand found its way to my breast and he began to caress it softly, his caresses becoming firmer and firmer with every pass. He took my nipple in between his thumb and forefinger twisting it with just the right amount to bring pleasure and not pain. I groaned involuntarily at the sensation. _

_His other hand came from beside him to encircle me, turning me around to face him. There wasn't any conversation. It was an unwritten that we both needed and wanted this. He grabbed my dress and lifted it over my head. I reached out and took off his shirt as he undid his pants and slipped them off along with his shoes. _

_He leaned over to capture my lips in a sweet yet searing kiss. I had never had passion with Jacob and although I wouldn't classify that as a passionate kiss it was close. He made quick work of the remainder of our clothes and soon we were completely bare. _

_It wasn't awkward or strange as we caressed each other anywhere our hands could go. He kissed me deeper and when his fingers found purchase in the place I needed them the most I relished in his intimate touch. His fingers pressed and circled with great expertise until I was grabbing onto him as I rode out my orgasm. _

_He hovered over me and entered me slowly beginning a slow, steady rhythm. However, this wasn't what either of us wanted and soon he sped up his movements and was spilling his seed into the condom. Sated, I passed out. _

_When I awoke the next morning, Jacob was still asleep when I padded off to the bathroom. I wasn't quite sure what to think of this new revelation our relationship. I knew I cared for Jake but I definitely wasn't interested in dating him. Like I said we tried a few times, but agreed that we were better as friends. I returned to my room to find him awake. _

"_I was wondering where you went," he whispered. _

"_Bathroom," I said pointing in that direction. He nodded. We were silent. I stood there waiting for him to make a joke or kiss me on the cheek and tell me he'd catch me later, neither of which came. _

"_Bella, I know we agreed that we didn't want to date, but I'd like to ask you to reconsider." I opened my mouth to speak but he held up his hand. He got up and began to put his clothes on. "I know what you're going to say. I can see it on your face, but will you just take a few days and think about it? Please? You might see I'm exactly what you need. What you want. You know I'll take care of you and that I'll love you unconditionally. You also know that Charlie already loves me and our families are already mingled. I could take care of you, and if you could just give me, give us, a chance, I want to prove it to you." He stood before me looking lost yet full of hope. He grabbed my hand and kissed it sweetly. "Just say you'll think about it?" I nodded minutely as I watched him walk away. "Call me in a few days." And with that he was gone. _

_I called Alice and Rose immediately, explaining what had happened and even told Emily when she finally resurfaced. All offered their opinions. Alice didn't think it was true love, Rose just wanted me to be happy and Emily was happy I finally got laid. Over the next few days I thought about Jake and thought about us. I knew all of the things he said were true. He could and would take care of me without a doubt, but I just didn't feel the spark and I couldn't force it no matter how hard I tried. _

_Over those days I got an offer to move back to Seattle for work and I took it without a second's hesitation. Jake called me a few times leaving vague messages to return his call. I knew it was a matter of time before he came by. I packed most of my belongings which wasn't a lot and shipped them to my dad's. Emily promised to sell what she could of the rest and send me the money later. My mom wasn't in town but I left her a message telling her I would explain my rapid departure later. _

_As I boarded the plane to meet my friends in a last minute trip to Vegas before I moved, I stared at my phone. I knew I had to let him know something, but I was too much of a coward to face him or even call. When my plane started boarding, I quickly typed a response to him: _

_**I'm sorry. I can't. Please forgive me.**_

_And with that I left, knowing I had just broken his heart and mine in those seven words. _

_*End of flashback*_

He looked at the pictures that were placed on my bookshelf, picking up the one of us at Disneyworld.

"I remember that day," he said quietly tracing our faces with his index finger. I nodded. I remembered it, too. It was the day I realized I loved Jake. The day I left was when I realized it wasn't in the way he needed me to.

There was a knock on my door, but before I could answer it, the door flew open revealing a flushed Edward.

"Edward," I murmured. He looked at me, then at Jake, then back at me. His face shocked but expectant.

"Oh, ummm, Jake, this is my work colleague, Edward. Edward, this is my long-time friend, Jake."

"Boyfriend," he said holding out his hand. Edward stared at it for a moment before shaking it slightly. He looked back toward me.

"I heard you were sick, so I thought I'd come by to check on you but I see that you are… otherwise occupied," Edward said.

"I was sick but I'm feeling better now. Thank you for your concern." I looked at his face. It looked like he'd seen a ghost or like he was far away in another time or place.

"Okay, well, I'll let you… yeah." He turned and left. I let out my breath that I was holding. Nothing with that man was ever easy, apparently.

"Who was that asshole?" Jake asked.

"Jake. What the fuck? Why did you say you were my boyfriend?" I said giving him the evil eye. "He's not an asshole by the way. You're the asshole."

"Whatever, Bella. If it walks like an asshole and talks like an asshole, it's an asshole."

"Well, apparently it takes one to know one."

"So, what, are you fucking him, now? Is that why you haven't called me and you're getting all pissy that I'm calling him out for what he is?"

"Jake, really? What exactly are you doing here? Trying to get on my nerves? 'Cause you're succeeding. Mission accomplished. You can leave now the way you came."

"Bella, I don't like the way he looked at you. Okay. God. I just, I miss you like really miss you. I want you back. I want us back any way I can have us and I definitely don't want that asshole around along for the ride." He scoffed.

Men. Apparently, everything had to be turned into a pissing contest with them.

**A/N Ok there you go! Hope you liked! I am working on the next chapter as we speak! Please review ;) I'll work on the smutty Vegas outtake and on review replies as well! **

**Also my Fic was on The Perv Pack Smut Shack Lemon report for October 19th! I was so excited to see it there! Thank you to those who posted it and enjoyed it. It means a lot! Go check it out and all the wonderful fics there. The website is absolutely amazing! (delete the spaces and add www) / 2010/10 /lemon-report-octorber- 19th- ? zx=adf6d6acad98e6ee**


	6. Chapter 6 Emotional Rollercoaster

**A/N Hola peeps! Chapter 6 for you! Thank you for hanging in there. The outtake is well underway and should post soon and Chapter 7 shortly after! **

**Thank you to my loverly beta coachlady12! I love her something firece! Please go check out her stories on her ff site they are amazing! She has a finished one Dangerous Corporate Liaisons and a WIP Guarding Bella Swan. Both awesome so go now! 2113307/coachlady1**

**Also need to thank the back bone to the fic: Joayla and 84Gemma! They are truly the amazing ladies and I couldn't do it without their support! **

**Check out Joayla's wonderful stories on her ff site at: /1927725/joayla **

**Check out on my profile for song info and the lovely polyvore that 84Gemma did for the fic! **

**Also check out the banner that the talented rosalynn7885 made on the profile!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Not a single thing. All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of Stephenie Meyer. There is no copyright infringement intended.**

_Yesterday I told myself, I was going to be okay  
Going to start a new day, be truly happy  
I was going to take control of me  
But eventually reality hit me  
Mentally, physically, and emotionally  
And I opened my eyes and realized  
That I was still being taken for a constant ride_

_Emotional Rollercoaster by Vivian Green  
_

We left the office a little later on in search of food, neither of us discussing the pink elephant that was in the room.

I attempted to look for Edward before I left, with no luck. I wasn't exactly sure what I was going to say to him but I wanted to apologize to him for Jake and tell him that he really wasn't my boyfriend.

Part of me wondered why it mattered if he knew or not. He obviously had a fiancé and a baby on the way so it shouldn't matter if I had a boyfriend or not. The other part of me, the part that saw his face when he left, just wanted to clear the air with him, well, my air anyway. I didn't necessarily want him to tell me about him and Angela but I did want to straighten out my side at least. I had a feeling that in doing so, however, I'd have to hear his side as well.

Beforehand, I was prepared to hear it but now I wasn't sure I really wanted to know. I was never the "other woman" before, and I really didn't want to know how happy he truly was with her and if he'd just been sowing his wild oats with me, twice, before he settled down.

Jake and I went out for pizza and beer and talked about anything and everything except what had happened back in Florida.

"So, Emily punched him right in the throat!" he said laughing so hard at the memory. I couldn't help but laugh either. Emily was always threatening to punch people in the throat but I never thought she actually would. Apparently, after I left she got into an altercation with blond guy from the club when she found him pressing another girl against the back wall of the dance club. It appears that that was his calling card.

I had talked to Emily recently but only about the furniture she sold and the money transfer. Even though she and I were never best friends, I felt horrible for not asking her what had been going on in her life. I wasn't surprised to hear it was drama-filled though.

She had a revolving door of male friends and I always had my nose in a book but it worked well for us both. She was rarely home and when she was we had great conversations. I liked her not being home so I had peace and quiet to study but enjoyed our time together when she was. Plus, the rent was too expensive on our own. It really was the perfect roommate situation.

"Emily's doing well then?" I asked shoveling a slice of pizza into my mouth.

"Yeah, she's doing good. I think. I mean I saw her that night but not much after that. She met someone else and, well, you know." Yes, I did know.

"So, how have you been?" I felt like I was walking on eggshells now. I wasn't sure if I wanted to delve into this conversation here and now but it was the only segue I could think of.

"I've been good. Doing a lot of thinking," he paused, "about everything, really. That's why I'm moving back. I want to be near my dad and this is a great place to start a shop and with all the people I know it'll get off the ground in no time." I nodded knowing he was right. He knew a lot of people from the reservation that would give him their business with no questions asked.

"Where are you starting the shop at?"

"In La Push then one in Forks and so on. La Push will do well I know, so I think I can open up the one in Forks within a few years." He finished his pizza and downed his beer.

"You done?" he asked. I just nodded not sure of what else to say. I thought he'd dive into the conversation of how I'd disappointed him or broken his heart but it never came. He walked me back to my place saying good night with promises to call me soon so we could meet up. I just nodded again, unsure of the events unfolding before me or how to act.

When I got home I called my dad.

"Hey, Dad! How are you?"

"Bells, I'm good. Good to hear from you finally," he said but I could tell a small smile was present.

"I know, Dad." I laughed "I've just been busy you know unpacking and stuff. Exhausted. I'm going to come visit you this weekend though. I promise."

"Sounds good, kiddo. I was wondering when you were going to make time for your old man. Plus, you have all the rest of your stuff here from when you shipped it." Rose had made a trip to Forks when I'd first gotten to Seattle and picked up a bunch of boxes for me that I had already unpacked. I wasn't sure what else I'd left there.

"Oh, okay, Dad. I wasn't aware there were any boxes left."

"Yeah just a few. So, I'll see you Saturday?"

"Yeah you bet. Bye, Dad. Love you."

"Me too. Bye!" And with that he hung up. He wasn't much with words but I knew he loved me.

I groaned at the thought of calling my mother next. I had spoken to her briefly after Vegas and before the move but didn't get into details about why I'd left. I knew she wanted to know, but at the moment she was too busy with her new husband. I was happy for her, really, I was. However, my mom was over enthusiastic about sharing the details of her newly found sex life. I mean, we were close but not that close. I called but it went right to voicemail. Go figure. I didn't want to know what she was doing. I shuddered at the thought.

The next day dawned. I woke early feeling very nervous about talking to Edward. I really needed to clear up the situation with him. My stomach was in complete knots and I felt like I was going to be sick at any moment. After I ate I felt better but I wasn't sure what to say to him. "Sorry. Jake can be an ass and he's not really my boyfriend"?

I got to work early fully intending on catching Edward beforehand. I noticed he was usually in his office well before anyone else; however, today he didn't show. I continued working on my projects, periodically checking his office.

When lunch time rolled around, I decided to head out hoping he would be in later that day. Part of me wondered if I could look up his phone number and call him but that just made me feel too desperate. I guessed I could ask the all-knowing Jessica but she'd probably just shoot me evil glares for even mentioning him. As I left I noticed almost everybody was already gone and the office was quiet. I walked to the elevator when I saw movement in Edward's office. His lights were off but I could see a shadow moving around.

I walked over and looked through the door suspiciously. I saw Edward leaning over his desk staring at something. He was dressed casually and obviously not there for work purposes. I watched him for a moment. His jeans hung low on his hip; he wore a white t-shirt with a flannel. He was just pure epic hotness. My mind was instantly flushed with images of being taken in the bathroom in Vegas. That was a new one. Even though my memory from that night was more like a photo book you flipped through, the mental images produced were flaming hot.

I felt strange staring at him so I cleared my throat to let him know I was there. He looked up at me briefly then back down to his paperwork. Annoyed, I stood there unable to figure out what to say or do. Finally, I just went for it.

"I was looking for you today." He looked up at me again and studied my face for a moment. It looked like he was going to say something but quickly changed his mind.

"Oh, yeah? Why's that?" he asked dryly.

"Umm, I wanted to talk to you about yesterday."

"What about yesterday?" The strain in his voice gave him away. He knew exactly what I was talking about.

"I'm sorry about what happened."

"Sorry of my meeting your boyfriend or sorry you got caught?" Umm, wait. What the fuck?

"Excuse me?" I asked stunned at his accusation.

"You heard me. Are you sorry that I met you boyfriend or that you got caught red-handed?"

"I don't think you have the right to speak to me like that!" The nerve of this man! The same one who had a fiancé was calling me out on a supposed boyfriend? Please!

"Whatever." He went back to looking at his work. I went over and grabbed it away from him. Okay, so I was a little pissed but he had no right to degrade me. Here he sat high on his horse when he was far from noble.

"Listen here, asshole. You have no right to talk to me like this. What I do or don't do is none of your fucking business! And before you start pointing fingers you might want to reconsider pointing one at yourself!"

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" he bellowed.

"Oh, you know exactly what I'm talking about." I stared at him. He glared back.

"You women are all the same, you know that? Any time you get caught, you try to place the blame somewhere else." And with that I walked up to him and slapped him. This man had had me riding on an emotional rollercoaster since we'd met and I wanted the fuck off. I couldn't explain these feelings that I had for him but I didn't want them, not at all. Whatever this was we had going on had to end. Regardless of how much my body craved him, I was done.

"You listen here, Edward," I seethed "You have some nerve generalizing me with that kind of statement. You don't know me so don't begin to think that you do. I'm over this… this…" I waved my hands between us both "whatever the fuck this is. Stay away from me and I'll stay away from you and we'll call it a day and move on with our lives." As I started to leave he spoke.

"Bella, trust me. I know enough about you to know that what I say is true and I have full intentions of staying away. No worries." I turned to face him again. I wasn't going to let him have the last word.

"What you presume I am, I can guarantee you're wrong. Just because you think you have the facts doesn't mean that information is accurate. Jacob is not my boyfriend and never has been. He's a good friend of mine that at one point in time wanted to be more but never was. He was having a pissing contest with you because, well, let's face it, all men do it seems, and he wanted to piss you off. And for the record you are far from angelic here. You disgust me."

"What is it you think you know that disgusts you so much about me, Bella?" His angry eyes softened only slightly.

"Enough to stay away from you."

"Please enlighten me."

"Angela," was all that I could get out before my emotions started to take over. I couldn't let him see me cry. I had to get out of there, fast. I looked at him one last time as a look of shock then realization crossed his face before he looked back at me.

"You know nothing of my relationship with Angela so don't begin to assume that you do, but I can guarantee you that you've most definitely been operating under false pretenses about me." He gathered up his things and started to leave.

"What's that supposed to mean?" He didn't answer my question.

"I'm leaving for a little while. I have to go assist the new firm in Chicago."

"I didn't hear anything about this." My professional side randomly kicked in.

"No, but you should soon enough. This is all a new development. That's why I wasn't in today. I'm leaving first thing tomorrow." He took the papers back that I'd snatched. "Goodbye, Bella." He leaned in and kissed me sweetly on the forehead, hesitating just a moment before leaving me behind in his dark office. It always felt like he was leaving me and I absolutely hated that feeling.

I wasn't sure what to think. One moment we go from screaming at each other to his kissing me on the forehead. I was so confused about the entire situation that I just couldn't wrap my head around anything. Luckily, the rest of the day flew by. Edward was right. I did get confirmation from higher-ups that he was going to Chicago for six weeks and I had to make all the necessary arrangements for his absence.

I went home and relaxed on the couch watching _How_ _to Lose a Guy in Ten Days_. Sometimes Jake didn't sound like such a bad option. I'd be happy I know, but we'd have no passion and I needed passion.

The rest of the week flew by in much the same fashion. I woke with my stomach in knots over the conversation with Edward. I never fully got better throughout the day. I was tempted to call him numerous times but to say what, exactly? "Uh, yeah, can you tell me what I'm misunderstanding?" Yeah, not the conversation I was intending to have. It'd have to wait till he got back and I was okay with that. I needed space. Since he'd been around my thoughts had been far too cloudy. At night I crashed early and slept hard. I was mentally exhausted by all of the extra work I'd had to do with the absence of Angela and now Edward and the whole situation in general.

I drove to my dad's house Saturday morning promising myself that I wouldn't think of work, Edward, Angela, or Jake. I sang my favorite songs the whole way and thinking of what book I wanted to read next. I was in fairly good spirits when I arrived at my dad's house, that was until I saw a familiar car sitting on the side of the road. I really didn't want to see him but I braved it anyway.

"Dad!" I called from the entrance. The house hadn't changed much over the years and I liked it that way. It was a constant in my ever-changing world.

"We're in the kitchen." As I walked through to the kitchen I noticed only a few feminine touches here and there. You couldn't really tell a woman, my dad's girlfriend, lived here at all. As I walked through the door, I saw Jacob sitting with my dad at the table. Sue was at the stove stirring something in a pot.

"Hello," I said as cheerfully as I could.

"Hi," Jake said. My dad got up and gave me a hug.

"We were wondering when you'd be getting here."

"Really," I answered looking over to Jake for some confirmation of why he was here.

"Hi, dear," Sue called from her post. She came over to me giving me a tiny squeeze.

"My, Bella, you look so skinny and tired. Are you eating and sleeping enough?" Sue always picked up on things nobody else did.

"No, not really. Work has been crazy, to say the least. I'm still trying to figure everything out there." I trailed off. I didn't want to elaborate much more. "So, Jake what brings you to these parts?" His dad's house was a good forty-five minute's drive away.

"Umm, I was helping your old man out around the house today, but he wanted me to stick around to help you load those boxes into your car."

"Oh, that's okay, Jake. No worries." I was starting to wonder if he'd done this on purpose but I'd venture to say that he had.

"Here, Bella, I'll make you a plate." Sue scooped some of the stew into bowl and brought it over to me.

"Thank you, Sue."

"Anytime, baby, anytime." She patted my shoulder and looked at me expectantly.

I spent the weekend going through my boxes and throwing out unnecessary items. I couldn't believe I'd kept some of this stuff, but I did leave Florida hastily so I really wasn't that surprised. I spent the other time sleeping and reading. I didn't dwell on Edward though he was still frequenting my dreams. I didn't mind him there so much because at least there I was satisfied.

Sunday afternoon came. As I sat on the couch going through old photo albums contemplating heading back to Seattle, Sue walked in carrying groceries.

"Oh, let me help you with those!" I said jumping off the couch and running to assist.

"No, dear. You just come into the kitchen so I can cook you something. You are far too skinny!" I laughed at her maternal instincts kicking in and immediately began talking to her about her daughter.

"She's twenty-one this year," Sue said with a huge smile on her face. "She graduates this December and then she'll be back to visit." Leah had been so young when I'd left that I hadn't realized she was already in her twenties. I could still see her with braces and pigtails sitting on the porch.

"Wow. Time flies, huh?"

"Yes, it sure does."

Sue asked about Seattle and my job. I told her all I could without going into much detail. She'd been with my dad for five years now but I still didn't know her all that well. Enough to feel comfortable, but not enough to discuss deep dark secrets like getting screwed in a dance club by someone who may or may not be getting married and having a baby. Oh, how my life had changed into a soap opera.

"So, you're feeling better? You're looking better since you've been here." She said.

As I started to help her clean up I noticed a bag left on the table from the store. "Yes, I'm feeling much better. Thank you. I think the country air helps clear my head." I began unpacking the bag and noticed it was a box, a box with pregnancy tests. I looked over at Sue who was staring at me, gauging my reaction.

"Sue, are you… are you pregnant?" I whispered the last part. I didn't think she was still young enough to have a baby but anything was possible.

"Oh, God no, honey." She laughed. "That box there, I bought for you."

**A/N Ok! W00t! Vegas outtake up soon and then chapter 7 soon after that! Then in a chapter or two (8 or 9) we'll see EPOV chapter! Review and leave me lovings! I like lovings…**


	7. Chapter 7 Vegas

**A/N SMUT. Did that get your attention? Hope so! This is the promised Vegas "outtake" I decided to make it a flashback chapter because well it fits into the story here. We are going back to where it all began. *w00t* Hopefully it'll clear up some questions up for you guys. Remember she's old enough to do this stuff. And who wouldn't leave for a little fun with Edward? Right? Also this is fiction. Imagination. Oh also Chapter 7 coming up soon!**

**Thank you to my lovely beta coachlady12! I love her something fierce! Please go check out her stories on her ff site they are amazing! She has a finished one Dangerous Corporate Liaisons and a WIP Guarding Bella Swan. Both awesome so go now! 2113307/coachlady1**

**Also need to thank the back bone to the fic: Joayla and 84Gemma! They are truly amazing ladies and I couldn't do it without their support! **

**Check out Joayla's wonderful stories on her ff site at: /1927725/joayla **

**Check out on my profile for song info and the lovely polyvore that 84Gemma did for the fic! **

**Also check out the banner that the talented rosalynn7885 made on the profile!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Not a single thing. All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of Stephenie Meyer. There is no copyright infringement intended.**

"_Listen up now honey, you're gonna be sorry  
Can't get out from under a sky that is falling  
And you say  
No fame no money I'm nobody  
The way I'm running has sure got me down  
On my knees.  
But next stop, Vegas please"._

_Vegas by Sara Bareilles_

***Flashback Chapter***

I arrived in Vegas early Saturday and went straight to our room at the Four Seasons. Alice had already been there a few days for a conference she was attending and I was glad she'd decided to make it girls' weekend and keep the suite. That meant the moment I got there I could pass out and not have to wait for other rooms to be available. I was exhausted, both mentally and physically. I'd left so much behind in Florida but I couldn't bring myself to care. All I wanted to do was sleep, drink myself stupid and not think about any of it at all.

After my nap I awoke feeling refreshed. I took a long shower to wash off the grime of my travels and my sorrows. When I emerged Rose and Alice were back from their shopping extravaganza.

"Bella!" Alice squealed when she saw me exit the bathroom in my underwear. "I've missed you so much. I'm so glad you could make it!" She enveloped me in a signature Alice hug.

"I've missed you guys, too!" I leaped over and gave Rose a hug before going over to my suitcase to find something to wear. I didn't have very many options.

"No worries, Bella. Alice picked out a few things for you while we were out." I shot Alice a look that she knew all too well.

"Bella, I know you are more than capable of dressing yourself so don't give me that look! I just found some things that were cute that I thought would look good on you, that's all!"

"Yeah, more like_ thirty _things you'd think would look good on her." Rose scoffed. I rolled my eyes because this was typical Alice. She'd gotten better over the years, granted I wasn't there for the majority of it, but nonetheless, she was better.

"Okay, let me see what you bought," I said knowing fighting her would be a losing battle. She squealed and went right to work. She picked out a black mini dress with a strapless bra and the most amazing black shoes I'd ever seen. She accented her masterpiece with a big black ring, dangle bracelets and a chain necklace. I donned a "barely there" pair of underwear underneath it all and I'd never felt sexier. Alice knew what she was doing, that was for sure. The girls got ready while I threw my hair up in a twisted braid and we headed out. I grabbed my infamous leather jacket getting glares from Alice along the way.

"Alice, it's December! I'm not going out without a jacket!" She rolled her eyes. I wasn't about to be as crazy as my two friends who were both wearing barely any clothing while it was forty degrees outside.

After hailing a cab, we arrived at our destination, the Vanity Club at Hard Rock. Inside was absolutely amazing. The room appeared to glow different shades of purple and the room felt very intimate regardless of its size.

We hit the bar as soon as we got in, ordering our usual drinks. After a few drinks, we began to dance together, eventually dancing with men as they approached us. I was enjoying my time immensely. I didn't think of Jacob or my upcoming move back home and all that would entail. I just drank and let go.

A one point in time I couldn't even find my friends in the crowd of people as I sashayed over to get another drink. As I ordered my next drink and waited, I tried to figure how many drinks I'd had with no luck. The room had become kind of spin-y…

Deep in thought I caught sight of a hot guy sitting across the bar. He appeared to be alone and was staring at me like he wanted to devour me. Not that I would have minded. I looked over my shoulder to see if there was someone else he could be looking at. That's when I noticed a hot blond standing right behind me in a red strapless top and big breasts. Ah, no wonder. I gave her a once over. She was hot and so was he. They'd make a perfect pair. I wasn't there to pick up guys, anyway. I just wanted to get my drink on.

After my drink arrived I took a few sips to calm my nerves. Why would I even think that a guy like that would be staring at someone like me? I looked in his direction and noticed he was gone and so was the blond.

I stood there for a seconds sipping my drink and scanning the crowd for my friends. I still didn't see them. I grabbed my bag to fish out my phone. We'd agreed that if we got separated we'd text. As I was digging I felt a presence next to me. I looked up to see the guy from across the bar now standing next to me. I guessed he was looking for the blond.

I texted my friends once I found my phone to ask where the hell they were. As I slipped the phone back into my bag, I felt the guy's eyes on me. I turned toward him in an attempt to figure out what he wanted.

"Hi," he said.

"Hi," I said back. "If you're looking for the blond chick in the red top I don't know who or where she is."

"What?" he asked surprised.

"The blond chick with the big tits. The one that was behind me that you were staring at. I'm not sure where she went." I said loudly. It was really hard to talk over the music.

"I was staring at you." I looked at him to see if he was joking but he looked completely serious.

"Why?"

"Because you're breathtakingly beautiful." I scoffed at him. "You don't see yourself clearly do you?" All I could do was stare at him. He was hovering over me and I got the sudden urge to kiss him so I did. I was drunk and horny and he was just so… delicious.

Part of me fully expected him to push me away but the other part begged for him to kiss me back. And kiss me back he did. His lips were soft but firm. I could feel the desire rolling off him as he grabbed onto my hips. We kissed for what felt like mere seconds though I'm sure it was minutes. I didn't want it to end.

"Come with me back to my hotel," he said reaching up rubbing my cheek gently. I knew I shouldn't have, but I felt like I would never get another opportunity like this again and, oh, God, how I wanted him. I chugged the rest of my drink and nodded my head slightly, momentarily forgetting about my friends. As he led me out of the club I reached my phone and quickly dialed Alice. It went straight to voicemail.

"Alice," I whisper-yelled into my phone. "I'm leaving with a guy, a fuck-hot guy. I know you've always told me to take risks and live, well, I am. I'm sure you didn't think I'd suddenly take your advice while in Vegas, but I'll be fine, I promise. I have my pepper spray just in case. I'll text you where we are later on. Love you!" I snapped the phone shut and caught up with my mystery hot man who was now holding a cab door for me.

We made out like teenagers in the back of the cab. I felt like I was fifteen again especially with the cab driver giving me dirty looks in the mirror. We arrived at the hotel and I realized he was staying in the same place we were. Coincidentally creepy or fate? Who cared really? I was getting laid!

As we rode the elevator up, we couldn't keep our hands off each other. As the doors opened and I followed Hotness down the hall, I quickly texted Alice our location and the floor we were on. I didn't think I should give her the room number just in case. I briefly saw a text from her telling me to have fun, be safe, and that she and Rose had met hotness themselves.

We entered into the room and I was immediately pinned to the door. He assaulted my lips and neck. His hands were running up and down my body leaving a tingling sensation in their wake. My hands went immediately to his hair and I pulled him closer. He let out a low groan. He took off my jacket and threw it to the ground, his hands immediately returning to the hem of my dress. They inched their way up my thighs as his mouth once again assaulted my neck.

His fingers skimmed the outline of my panties and I shivered with anticipation but instead of moving toward my center his hands moved toward my ass lifting me, my legs instantly circling his waist. He kneaded my backside as I began to remove his shirt and throw it alongside my jacket. He unzipped my dress and slowly lifted it up and over my head. He got one look at my black lacy bra and matching thong and groaned, immediately attacking the swell of my breast. I really loved Alice at the moment for buying me this set. If I'd get responses like this, I'd buy millions more.

I gasped when he pulled the cups of my bra down with his teeth and started licking and nipping at my nipples. Instantly, they were hard. He started to walk with me to toward the bathroom. I wasn't sure why we were going there but as long as he kept doing what he was doing I didn't care where the hell we were going. He sat me down on the counter and reached into his bag that was resting there. He grabbed out a few Magnums and set them aside, condoms, of course.

I instantly went to his zipper and began to pull down his pants and boxers. His body was glorious, toned and taut. I ran my fingers absentmindedly over his abs. I wanted him to take me and I wasn't above getting fucked on the bathroom counter.

He pulled my ass to the edge of counter and pulled down my thong avoiding my shoes as he went.

"These stay on," he said in a gravelly voice referencing my shoes as he pulled my thong completely off. I moaned at the thought. His fingers went immediately to my center, my wetness coating his fingers. He spread my lower lips apart and began to rub my clit slowly and firmly causing me to shiver, creating luscious friction. I should have been embarrassed that he was seeing me like this but I could care less at the moment. I needed more of him.

"Please," was all I could manage to say as my heart raced with anticipation. Gradually, he inserted a finger and began to pump in an out, his thumb caressing my clit every time he entered me. He sped up his movements and soon he'd created a delicious pattern that was quickly bringing me to the edge. He knelt down and his tongue suddenly took the place of his thumb. As he sped up, he entered another finger and then another. My breath became shallow and I closed my eyes. The sight of him alone was going to set me off. This man knew exactly what he was doing. As his fingers began to curl inside me, I started to explode. I forgot who I was and where I was as I focused on the intense pleasure this man brought me. As I rode the waves of my orgasm, instantly wanting more, he grabbed a condom and put it on.

"I've wanted to fuck you the moment I saw you." And before I could respond he kissed me passionately then impaled me in one swift movement. We both groaned in delight at the sensation.

"Lean back a little," he requested. I leaned back onto my hands causing a delicious new angle. He started slow at first but within seconds he began to move in me quickly. He pulled the cups of my bra down further so my breasts appeared to be sitting on a shelf. They bounced effortlessly with each magnificent impact. He apparently seemed to enjoy them as he began kneading them. I don't think I'd ever been so gloriously filled. I knew I would be feeling this tomorrow.

His fingers went from caressing my breasts to assaulting my clit. He leaned forward and nibbled on my nipple. The sensations together were overwhelming. I was completely consumed by him. Feeling his magic fingers and tongue swirling together effortlessly had me approaching my second orgasm fast. He pulled me off the counter just enough so that I could lean back on my elbows, my head falling back as I moaned in delight at every move. He took my right leg and slung it up on his shoulder, my left still encircling his waist. This new angle hit the right spot and I was falling yet again.

"Fuck," I screamed as I came hard. Wave after wave of intense pleasure crashed over me. A few more pumps and he followed with a loud groan. We laid there for a moment both collecting ourselves until I realized that my elbows were throbbing. I sat up just as he pulled out.

"Well, I didn't expect that," I said laughing, suddenly feeling very awkward. I wrapped my arms around myself in a vain attempt to cover up. I was suddenly very self-conscious.

"Don't hide." He reached up and unwrapped my arms. He hoisted me up and off the counter, kissing me fervently.

"Shower?" he asked leading me in the direction.

"Oh, yes, please."

He turned the water on and as we waited for it to get warm I couldn't help but ogle this man. I couldn't believe I was having sex with him in his hotel room in Vegas. If I hadn't known any better I would have thought we were in a movie or something, a porn movie, yes, but still.

He led me into the shower and gingerly began washing my body. I grabbed the soap and lathered up my hands to help with his. Instantly, this man was hard again. My hands slowly made their way down to his penis, standing already at full salute. I licked my lips with excitement.

I leaned over and licked his tip causing him to suck his breathe in shock. I swirled around the tip before taking just the head into my mouth. He was smooth and hot. I continued down realizing I would need to use my hands as well. I began to suck and twist. I may not have been that sexual but I knew I could give good blowjobs.

I went down and up then around and continued that move adding in tongue after every downward move. I looked up to see his head leaning back as he moaned in ecstasy. As I gripped his head firmer I heard him gasp and pull away slightly.

"Jesus, you're going to make me come."

"Isn't that the point?" I asked confused. He shook his head his eyes sparkling with plans.

"I want to be inside you when I come."

"Oh." was all I said taking this glorious man in. He left the shower momentarily coming back with a condom. He ripped it open quickly and put it on, not even taking a moment. Apparently, he was just as hot as I was.

"Turn around." I did as I was told.

"Lean forward and put your hands up there," he said pointing toward the ledge. I put my hands up as I felt his fingers on my pussy, teasing my entrance.

"God, you are so fucking wet." I leaned back into his touch instantly wanting him to fill me again. I was going to let him have me any way he wanted for as long as he wanted. Soon, I felt the tip of his dick enter me slowly. This wasn't rushed like before.

When he was fully in he leaned forward and grabbed my hips whispering, "Hold on, beautiful." When he said those words I got even wetter. He started to slam into me from behind causing me to let out the loudest moans.

"God, your pussy is so fucking tight." I moaned even louder. "You like when I talk dirty to you?" I nodded because yes, it was hot when he talked dirty to me. "The moment I saw you I wanted to taste and fuck you. All I could do was imagine you in my bed riding me like your life depended on it, your glorious tits bouncing around. That's what we're doing next. I can't get enough of you and if you'll let me I'll fuck you all night and make you come over and over and over again. I promise you that." I moaned my approval. He brought his hand to my clit and began circling it the same time he started circling his hips. All the new sensations were all running together causing me to shake, my knees suddenly getting weak. His arms were back around my waist and he was moving into me faster.

"You are so fucking beautiful. I want you to come all over my cock." And I was done for. I came and I came and I came. I saw blackness burst into white flames. He followed soon after me shouting numerous expletives.

"Fuck that was just… fuck," I groaned. He let me go and pulled out, offering me an arm to help me stand up right.

"That was… there are no words," he said looking into my eyes.

"You can say that again," I whispered, fully understanding what he was saying.

"No words." He leaned into me capturing my lips in a sweet kiss. My heart soared at the moment we were having. I broke apart from him and looked him in the eyes.

"Now, what's this about me riding you as if my life depended on it?" I smirked as I saw his eyes instantly hood with lust.

"Oh, you really shouldn't have said that." He growled moving forward turning off the shower and lifting me up and over his shoulder caveman style. I squealed as he threw me onto the bed.

He spent the rest of the night keeping his promise.


	8. Chapter 8 Clocks

**A/N Just want to thank all of ya'll for reading. I really do appreciate it. As you know this isn't the easiest thing to do. That being said here is the next chapter. Remember this is fiction and although there are a lot of "coincidences" in this please keep an open mind and remember anything is possible. Imagination is a wonderful thing! Plus this is my first fic so I'm still learning! **

**Thank you to my lovely beta coachlady12! I love her something fierce! Please go check out her stories on her ff site they are amazing! She has a finished one Dangerous Corporate Liaisons and a WIP Guarding Bella Swan. Both awesome so go now! 2113307/coachlady1**

**Also need to thank the back bone to the fic: Joayla and 84Gemma! They are truly amazing ladies and I couldn't do it without their support! **

**Check out Joayla's wonderful stories on her ff site at: /1927725/joayla **

**Check out on my profile for song info and the lovely polyvore that 84Gemma did for the fic! **

**Also check out the banner that the talented rosalynn7885 made on the profile!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Not a single thing. All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of Stephenie Meyer. There is no copyright infringement intended.**

_Confusion never stops  
Closing walls and ticking clocks  
Gonna, come back and take you home  
I could not stop that you now know_

Singin', come out upon my seas  
Curse missed opportunities  
Am I, a part of the cure  
Or am I part of the disease

_Clocks by Coldplay_

Pregnant? Pregnant? What? No, no. There was no way. No way. Every time we used protection. Every. Single. Time. Plus I'm on the pill. It just wasn't possible. Was it?

"You look like you've seen a ghost Bella," Sue said sounding concerned.

"Umm, what?" I stammered looking over at her realizing she was still in the room.

"Are you okay?" she asked. I thought about the question. Was I okay? I wasn't sure. Pregnant? I was trying to do the math in my head and I was failing miserably. How long ago was Vegas? How long ago was my period? I couldn't think. Not here, not like this.

"Honey?" Sue leaned over and rubbed small circles on my back.

"Umm, yeah, I'm okay. Just shocked that's all. I never even thought about that. How did you…" I couldn't finish the statement.

"I have my ways, honey. I have great intuition. Do you want to talk about it?" Should I tell her what happened? No. I liked Sue but I couldn't fathom jumping into that conversation with her. Not right now at least.

"No, I'm okay. I'll probably just be heading out, though."

"Oh. Okay, honey. Please call me if you need to talk okay? I'm here you know." And I did know. Sue was the best thing that happened to my dad. She centered him and I was grateful for that. I walked over and hugged her, thanking her for her concern and telling her to let my dad know I'd be calling him sometime in the next week.

"Oh, and if you could not tell my dad about this…" I trailed off.

"Your secret's safe with me."

"I mean, I don't even know for sure, so no point in worrying him over potentially nothing, right?" I'm not sure who I was trying to convince here, her or me.

"Of course, Bella. Absolutely. Drive safe."

I packed my things and headed out the door. I had to get home fast. Along the way all I could think about was Jacob and Edward. I knew that I'd slept with Jacob right before graduation which was the 5th. I had my period days later like the 8th or 9th. I'd arrived in Vegas on December 19th and, well, yeah, met Edward. Today was the 31st of January. It was well over a month ago that I'd met Edward. How could I be over six-weeks pregnant and not even realized it?

When I got home I paced my living room. My head was yet again a jumbled mess. It was filled with dates and doctors and forms. I vaguely remembered Vegas but I was pretty sure we'd used protection every time. But how could I be sure if my memory was so vague. Counter, shower, bed a few times… oh. Oh, no. I do vaguely remember some cursing going on in the bed and Edward asking me if I was on the pill. Something must have happened to the condom. Even if that was so, I had birth control.

I went to the bathroom and read over the test multiple times before taking it out of the package. It was now or never. As I peed on the stick, my mind wondered, thinking what I would feel like with either result and in all honesty, I would feel elation either way. I wasn't ready to be a mom, especially in these circumstances, but I never wrote off being a mom either. Plus, it wasn't like I was young and having a kid. I was twenty-seven. Young by some people's definition but I always wanted a kid by the time I was thirty.

I paced the bathroom waiting for the three-minute timer to be up. I wanted three minutes just be sure. Sue had gotten me the test that said _Pregnant _or_ Not Pregnant_. I doubted I could read lines at this moment anyway. I debated calling Alice and Rose to come hold my hand but I just couldn't do it. I needed to do this on my own.

As the timer dinged I walked slowly over to the white plastic stick that held my future. I took a deep breath and looked at the screen. One tiny word stared back at me that made my world spin on its axis.

_Pregnant. _

Not long after the results, I found myself crying on the bathroom floor. I was crying for joy and crying for sorrow and all of the emotions in between. Was this what I wanted? Could I do it on my own? Question after question flooded my mind. Soon it all became too much and I found myself reaching for the phone and dialing a familiar number.

"Bella?"

"Hi, Dad."

"Everything okay?"

"Yes, Dad, everything is fine." I heard some shuffling then a creak of the door. Shit, I didn't realize it was so late.

"Why are you calling so late then?"

"Actually, I needed to ask Sue a question but it can wait till tomorrow. I'm sorry to wake you." As I started to hang up I heard whispers on the other end then Sue's voice came on.

"Bella, I'm going to the other room, okay?" This was Sue's way of telling me she was going to be alone. Moments later I heard her shut a door and the chair creak beneath her as she sat down.

"I'm guessing the news is a "yes" then?"

"Oh, Sue. What am I going to do?" I said sitting down putting my head in my hand.

"Bella, you'll be fine. It's a baby not the end of the world."

"I know but I have so many questions. I just don't know where to start!"

"Like, what questions."

"Well, to begin with how the hell did this happen!" I screeched.

"Well…" Sue began.

"Sue we used protection every time. I think one time we had a problem with the condom, but I am also on birth control!"

"Birth control isn't one-hundred percent, you know."

"I know, but it's like 99.9%."

"Well more like ninety-eight percent effective."

"Still, that's a pretty big rate don't you think?"

"Yes, but anything is possible, Bella. Tell me did you take the birth control right?"

"What do you mean? Of course I did."

"I mean, did you take it at the same time every day?" I thought back and wondered if I did.

"I'm pretty sure I did. I used to use an alarm when I lived in Florida to remind me but with the move I started to slip on the time but I still took it around the same time every day."

"Well, that can affect it. Also, did you take anything to lessen your birth control's effectiveness?"

"Like what?"

"Well, I remember your father telling me you were on antibiotics for a sinus infection right around the time you left Florida, right?"

"Yeah, so?" I wasn't following her.

"Bella, you know antibiotics can affect birth control potency don't you?" And there it was. Shit. Of course, during the move I wasn't the greatest at taken my pills, and, of course, I took medication that affected it. The universe was conspiring against me.

"Oh, my God, Sue. What am I going to do?" And with that Sue went off and told me exactly what I should do. First and foremost find a doctor and confirm the test. I was glad I jumped the gun and called her because despite my situation I felt a lot better after our call and was able to fall into a slumber although not a peaceful one.

I went to work the next morning in daze. I wasn't sure what to do with my newly found information. Getting a doctor was definitely on my top-priority list. As I settled into my desk and turned on my computer, I wondered if I should call Alice and Rose and ask them about their gynos. No, that would be too obvious. I didn't want to tell them about this until I knew for sure. As I pulled up my Internet Explorer, there was a knock at my door.

"Come in." Angela came in, a small smile on her face.

"Hi, Bella."

"Hi, Angela. Come in. What can I do you for?" She took a seat in the chair across from me.

"I was wondering if you were available for lunch today. We definitely need to catch up and I'd like to go over some of the work you've accomplished so far."

"Oh, Angela, that's really not necessary."

"Oh, yes, it is. Plus it's on the company. I'll stop by to get you around noon, okay?" and with that she left.

Noon rolled around before I knew it and Angela stood in my door way.

"I thought we could head to Metro and grab a bite? Does that work?"

"Sure." I gathered my things and followed her out. As we settled into our booth at the Metropolitan Grill, we had an easy conversation.

"He's kicking up a storm today," Angela said grabbing her stomach.

"When are you due?" I asked knowing that was the next logical question to ask.

"April 10th and it can't get here any sooner."

"Any names picked out?" Oh, please don't tell me "Edward, Jr."

"Benjamin Arthur Cheney, Jr.," she said with a sad smile. "Named after his father." Come again?

"His father?" Angela looked at me searching my face.

"No one told you the story?"

"Story? What story?"

She sighed. "Well you should know. You know how I've been out the last month or so?" She was now looking down at her lap.

"Yes," I said nodding my head and taking a sip of my water. I had a feeling this story was going to be intense.

"Well, my fiancé Ben had a thing for motorcycles. I've always hated the things, you know. Begged him to stop riding them but it was what he liked and he told me it made him feel free. Anyway, we were scheduled to get married right before Christmas. After we found out about the baby, we didn't want to wait." She rubbed her stomach absentmindedly.

"Edward was Ben's best friend, and one night before the wedding, Edward called, upset, asking if Ben could come over as soon as possible. Of course, Ben went to comfort him. That was Ben. I begged him to take the car and not the bike because the roads were slick, but he didn't listen saying it was a short drive and it wasn't anything to worry about. He kissed me goodbye that night, and long story short, he never made it to Edward's." I gasped.

"He got hit by a drunk driver who ran a red light. It wasn't even the bike or the road; it was the other driver." She was sobbing now. "The driver didn't even stop and in one split second he took away my entire world—my lover, my baby's father, my best friend. They said that he may not have even survived had he been driving a car the driver was going that fast but it's hard to say." I moved closer to her and began to rub her back. People were looking toward us now, but I didn't care.

"Oh, Bella, it's been awful. Edward blamed himself. He blames himself for what happened to Ben. I blamed them both at first. First, I blamed Ben for going then Edward for needing him but through therapy the last six weeks, I've realized it wasn't Edward's fault for needing his best friend and it wasn't Ben's fault for being his best friend. It was just like Ben to go if he was needed. The situation was ultimately unavoidable. However, now I have Baby Ben on the way and I just don't know what to do. Edward has been so helpful. He put together all of the furniture and helped me paint—all the things Ben would've been doing. He's taken it so hard, acting out in all kind of ways. I just don't know what to do anymore." Wow. I couldn't gather my thoughts fast enough. My mind took all of her information and ran. So, the baby wasn't Edward's?

"I'm so sorry, Angela. I can't fathom what it is you've gone through. Is there anything I can do to help?" I leaned over and squeezed her hand.

"Oh, no, Bella, but thanks for offering. I just hope Edward is going to be okay. He's been acting out—getting drunk and getting kicked out of bars. What happened to Ben was awful but I don't want to lose another best friend over it."

"I understand." We sat in silence for a few moments. I dwelled on the new information.

"So, change the subject. Let's talk about you," she said attempting a smile but failing. We talked about Florida and my family. As time went on I realized how much I really liked Angela and decided to confide in her my secret.

"So, there's something I'd like to ask you."

"What's going on?" she asked suddenly looking concerned.

"Can you give me a recommendation for a gyno?"

"Um, sure. I really like mine. Here, let me get you his number. Male doctor is okay with you?"

"Um, yeah." I didn't really care. She fished through her purse and pulled out a pen and paper. She scribbled a number down and handed it to me.

"He's really great. I think you'll love him. He's actually…" Her phone started to ring and she was suddenly silent. "It's Edward. Can you give me a moment?" she asked. I nodded my head solemnly. Although I knew now there wasn't anything between them, I couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy as Angela walked off to talk to him. She came back a few moments later. We paid up and headed back to the office.

"I'm glad we finally got to have lunch and hang out, Bella."

"Me too."

"I'd planned on being here when you started but, well, you know."

"I know. How long has it been if you don't mind my asking."

"Ben died on December 22nd. We were going to get married on Christmas." That was right after Vegas. The rest of the day went by.

I scheduled my appointment at the gyno for the two weeks out. Right after Valentine's Day. I debated on telling Alice and Rose the news. I debated and decided that I would tell them after the appointment. I wanted more information before I dove into that conversation. What about Edward? With how we'd left it, I wasn't sure I could tell him. We weren't on the best of terms and this definitely wasn't something either of us had planned. I decided to wait until after the appointment for him as well.

The next two weeks went by excruciatingly slowly. I was sick and my whole body was tired. I was most definitely pregnant. There just wasn't any more explanation. As I waited in the waiting room to be seen, I noticed patient after patient come through all in different stages of their pregnancy. Was I ready for this? _Could_ I be ready for this? As I contemplated my abilities my name was called.

"Bella Swan?"

"Yes, that's me." I walked back with the nurse who took my weight and some blood then ushered me back into a small room. As I waited I looked at all the pictures on the wall, happy mothers holding their babies. There was a poster explaining the stages of pregnancy and one on breastfeeding. Soon, there was a knock and a handsome man with blond hair entered. He looked much too young to be a doctor but his persona made him seem old enough.

"Ah, Isabella. So nice to see you here."

"It's Bella. Just Bella." I said wondering why I was suddenly tongue tied.

"So, it appears you are pregnant. Congratulations. When was the first day of your last period?"

"December 8th." I knew this for a fact because it was right after Jacob and before Vegas.

"So, that will put you at about eight weeks. Let's do a quick scan to confirm and then we'll meet in my office." A few moments later a technician came in with an ultrasound machine. Apparently, being only a few weeks along the ultrasound had to be done intrauterine.

"Everything looks perfect, Bella. Looks like we're right on time. I'll see you in my office in a few moments." I got up and dressed and headed down the hall to the office.

"You might have some bleeding and slight cramping after that exam but that's common. Just use a pantyliner and if it's more than a pantyliner amount then give us a call and we'll bring you back in to have a look." He moved around his desk looking at paperwork and putting up files. "We confirmed you are around eight weeks, so you most likely conceived at or around December 20th. Your due date is September 14th. Does that sound accurate to you?" I swallowed. It was most definitely the time in Vegas. I nodded slightly.

"Okay, well, I'll write you a prescription for prenatal vitamins and I'll see you back in about four weeks. Did you have any questions?" I shook my head again and picked up the paperwork he was now handing me.

"It'll be fine, Bella. You have someone that you can lean on right?" I wasn't sure what to say to that. Did I? I knew I had Alice and Rose but anyone with my situation.

"Um, yes, my boss, Angela, is very helpful. She actually recommended me to you." The doctor stiffened slightly at the mention of Angela's name.

"Angela Webber?" I thought for a moment trying to remember her last name.

"Yes, that's her."

"Ah, yes, Angela has been a friend of the family for years. You said she's a coworker?"

"Yes."

"Well, then you must also work with my son, Edward." I swallowed, my throat suddenly very dry. I looked at his coat and realized his nametag said "Dr. Carlisle Cullen." Apparently, he was Edward's father. Fuck my life.

**A/N Thank you again for reading. Leave me love in a review! I'll give you love back! Next chapter is in EPOV! Hope to post in a week or so. Plus I have a little surprise… a little smutty O/s with Em and Rose from Vegas! All smut. No back story. Because why else do you read fic? J/k Posting that soon. **


	9. Chapter 9 Learning to fall

**A/N Here is EPOV that I've been promising! It's my first time with his POV so hope it reads ok! Next chapter up shortly! We are heading towards the end…sort of. We have about 5 or so chapters left. **

**Thank you to my lovely beta coachlady12! I love her something fierce! Please go check out her stories on her ff site they are amazing! She has a finished one Dangerous Corporate Liaisons and a WIP Guarding Bella Swan. Both awesome so go now! 2113307/coachlady1**

**Also need to thank the back bone to the fic: Joayla and 84Gemma! They are truly amazing ladies and I couldn't do it without their support! **

**Need to also thank Kas90_ for reading this for me! Check out her amazing story Family ties and guarding hearts on her FF page! /2109487/kas90**

**Check out Joayla's wonderful stories on her ff site at: /1927725/joayla **

**Check out on my profile for song info and the lovely polyvore that 84Gemma did for the fic! **

**Also check out the banner that the talented rosalynn7885 made on the profile!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Not a single thing. All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of Stephenie Meyer. There is no copyright infringement intended.**

"_I'm learning to fall, I can hardly breathe  
When I'm going down don't worry 'bout me  
Don't try this at home, pretend you don't see  
I don't want to know that you know, it should have been me"_

_Learning to fall by Boys like girls_

EPOV

Fuck.

What the fuck was I doing?

I sat on the edge of the bed in my cold, empty hotel room and ran my hands through my hair for the hundredth time. So much was plaguing my mind and I couldn't think straight. If I was being honest with myself, I haven't been able to think straight since she waltzed into my life. I threw on a pair of slacks and a wrinkled shirt and headed down to the hotel bar. Maybe a few drinks would calm me. I ordered Johnny Walker, neat, and after four of them, I felt my nerves calm and my lips go numb. Finally, I could breathe.

"You look like you could use some company." A blond with a nice rack stated standing way too close to me. She smelled of cheap perfume and cigarettes. She wasn't bad looking, really, or maybe it was just the alcohol, and on any other night perhaps I wouldn't have thought twice about taking her up to my room.

"I'll show you a good time, sugar. I'll make you forget whatever or whoever has you looking so sad." She pushed her chest toward me and ran her fake, acrylic nails down my arm. I looked over my shoulder and into her blue eyes. They weren't brown. They were all wrong.

"Thanks, but no thanks," I slurred. I waved to the bartender to let him know that I was leaving. With a slight nod he let me know he knew the drill—close my tab and charge my room. I knew my room service bill was going to be astronomical after this trip. I shook my head at the thought and stumbled toward the elevator.

I had been in Chicago for just over a month now and it was excruciating at best. There was only one place I wanted to be and that was the only place I knew that I wasn't welcome. I entered into the elevator with a loud sigh, pressing the number for my floor. I closed my eyes to ward off the uneasy feeling settling in my stomach. As the door closed, I felt a presence beside me. Opening my eyes I saw a familiar set of blue eyes staring up at me. Closing my eyes again I begged for her to just disappear. I really didn't need this right now.

"You look so upset, honey. What's bothering you?" I didn't answer. I continued to keep my eyes closed praying she'd get the fucking hint and back off.

"Broken heart?" she questioned. My breath stilled and I slowly opened my eyes. Was it that obvious? Without my saying a word, she nodded and looked down at the floor.

"I know how that is, honey, all too well. I just recently had my heart stomped on. Bastard left me after twelve years of marriage for an eighteen year old fresh out of high school." She toed at an invisible mark on the floor. Looking back up at me with tear-stained cheeks, her eyes reflected her anguish.

"Want me to help you forget?" The alcohol swirled around and suddenly I felt lightheaded. Before I could answer her, she was on her knees reaching for my groin. She quickly unzipped me and pulled me out.

"My goodness, what a beautiful cock you have." And with that she swallowed me whole. I pressed my back against the wall and squeezed my eyes shut. I begged myself to enjoy this. I needed this release. I tried to imagine it was Bella's lips around me and it was Bella's moans filling the air. I felt myself get slightly hard as Blue Eyes' ministrations continued on my cock. She licked and sucked me like a pro, and normally I would have grabbed her head and showed her exactly what I wanted from her, effectively fucking her mouth. But her moans were different, her smell was different and this was wrong on all fronts and my semi hard-on disappeared.

"What's the matter? Don't you like it?" She looked up at me through caked mascara, her eyes begging me to let her do this.

"I'm sorry. I can't." I pulled away from her and tucked myself back into my pants. The door opened signaling our arrival to my floor. I held open the door a moment looking back.

"What's your name?" I whispered.

"Irina."

"Well, Irina, the guy that broke your heart has some serious issues. You deserve better than that."

"Such kind words from a beautiful stranger." She pressed the button for a floor. "Thank you and I hope you figure out whatever it is that's plaguing your heart. However, in your case perhaps she's worth it." Then she was gone, her words weighing heavily on my heart.

I went back to my room and crashed onto my overstuffed bed not caring that I still had all my clothes on, Irina's words flooding my mind as I drifted into a drunken slumber.

I awoke the next morning no better than I had been when I'd left Seattle. I thought when I left, Bella would soon wane from my system and I'd be free from my memories, but, alas, here I sat a month later no better off than I was before. I was resolved not to speak with her after I left that day, but now I wondered if it was better if I did. Perhaps I could clear the air? Ease my mind into some sort of restitution about this whole fucked-up situation? I picked up my phone and began to dial, hanging up immediately.

What was I going to say, exactly? As words failed me yet again, I closed my phone and sighed. Running my hands through my hair, I decided in that moment I needed to just call. I had no plan on what to say. I would just do it. I dialed the number again and Jessica answered moments later.

"Hi, thank you for calling Steinbach and Goldstein. How may I direct your call?" I had almost forgotten what her voice sounded like and in one instant I was brought back to reality.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Jessica. It's Edward. Can you transfer me to Bella, please?"

"Hi, Edward," she purred. "I'm sorry, but Bella isn't available at the moment."

"What do you mean she's not available?"

"Well, she seems to be preoccupied at the moment with someone in her office. Would you like me to take a message for you?" I could practically see her batting her eyes at me over the phone.

"Um, no, Jessica, that won't be necessary. I'll try and catch her later. Thank you." I hung up before she could respond, my mind reeling from the possibilities of who she could have in her office that she was too busy to take phone calls for. Jacob. She'd told me he wasn't her boyfriend but he sure acted like one. I saw the flowers in her office that day and I saw the way he looked at her. If he wasn't her boyfriend, he definitely wanted to be.

After that my work exploded and I was unable to make any other calls. I thought of Bella and Angela often. I wanted to get back as soon as I could so I could be there for Angela when she gave birth to Ben, Jr. I felt like a horrible friend leaving her for the last few months of her pregnancy when I promised her I'd be there. I was one disappointment after another, apparently.

Angela, being Angela, told me not to fret, that as long as I got my ass there before she delivered, I was still in her good graces. After everything she'd been through she was still compassionate toward me though she had every reason to hate me.

Her fiancé, my best friend, died because of me. If I hadn't been so upset over Vegas, he would still be here. I'd called him, frantic after we'd gotten back from Vegas begging him to tell me what to do. I wanted to find the girl and I didn't know how. Being the friend he was he said he would be over immediately, when more than an hour had passed, I figured he'd thought better and stayed home with Angela. I was about to call Emmett when I got the call from Angela.

It was awful hearing the news about the drunk driver, and knowing Ben wouldn't have been out at all if I hadn't been such a pussy. I lost it after that. I went out and partied for almost a month straight, drinking my sorrows away. I got kicked out of numerous bars and eventually had an intervention from my family. My mother was beside herself, my father disappointed.

_*Flashback*_

"_Son, I know that the loss of Ben was hard on you. We get that, but you have to pull yourself together."_

"_Why, Dad? What's the point?" My head was pounding with my massive hangover from my days and days of drinking. _

"_You have to be there for Angela, son. She needs you now more than ever. Step up to the plate and be the best man that you pledged to Ben that you would be." And he was right. I had promised Ben that I would be his best man and be there by his side. I couldn't fail him now. So, I sobered up and went to Angela. Pulling into their driveway was hard, but it was a necessity. I needed to do this for Ben, for Angela. _

_I knocked on the door but there was no answer. I waited a few moments then slipped inside. What I found broke my heart. Angela was curled up in a ball on her bed bawling her eyes out. It couldn't be good for the baby. My resolve was made. I held her for the rest of the night and from then on I promised I would be there for her and the baby. And I had been until Chicago._

_*end of flashback*_

I was only supposed to be in Chicago for six weeks max. Here it was almost twelve weeks later, but I was finally heading back. My work was done and I could go home to try to win Bella's heart. I heard a few things about her here and there from Angela but not much. Most of the time I spoke with Angela I concerned myself with her and the baby. I was ready to face my ghosts and talk to Bella about what happened between us and beg her to give me another chance. I couldn't wait to see Angela, as well. She was very close to delivering and I wasn't going to miss it. That wasn't an option. I was sitting in the airport waiting for my flight when my phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Edward?"

"Hey, Dad! What's going on?"

"Angela's gone into labor."

"What? Really? But I'm not even on the plane yet!"

"Don't worry, son. The first baby usually takes a while. Her water just broke. She's on her way to the hospital now."

"Okay, okay. I'll be there soon. They're calling my flight now."

"Okay, we'll see you when you get here."

I landed four hours later and was on my way to the hospital. Updates from Angela's mother told me Angela was going slower than expected and she was only at six centimeters dilated. I got there just as she got her epidural and was feeling more comfortable, but the next ten hours were the longest of my life.

I held Angela's hand and whispered words of encouragement to help her as best I could while her mom did the same on the other side. Finally, at 12:03 am on April 12, Ben, Jr. made his appearance. He had a full head of black hair and his eyes were milky blue and he was absolutely gorgeous. I stayed with Angela for the night, helping her take care of Ben so she could nap.

"Edward, thank you so much for being here for me."

"Anytime, anytime." As I held Ben in my arms I realized exactly what I wanted out of life. I wanted this, this extreme joy. Before, I was content to float along and just be, screwing woman after woman. Not caring about names or places. Now, I wanted a family. I wanted a chance at happiness and I knew that chance could be Bella.

Anytime I thought her name, my heart raced. No one had elicited these kinds of feelings from me ever. It was like she was a drug, my own personal brand. I'd denied my body and my mind of her for so long that I just couldn't stop myself anymore. I thought leaving was going to be best for both of us, give us the space we needed so perhaps when I came back things would have subsided and we could be just coworkers. That plan failed miserably. If anything I wanted her more than I did before I left. I had to find her soon.

I took Angela home two days later and helped her settle in. Her mom was with her, so I knew she'd be fine but told her to call me immediately if she needed anything. I headed over to the office. It was Wednesday afternoon and I wanted to surprise Bella, hopeful that she would have dinner with me.

I exited the elevator and headed toward Bella's office only to find it dark and empty. I looked around for a moment before heading back toward the elevator.

"Hey, Edward. What are you doing here?" Jessica asked staring at me as if I was her next meal.

"Looking for Bella. Is she around?"

"No, she got off early today. Anything I could help you with?" Her intentions were obvious.

"No, thank you. I'll just catch her later on. Oh, and Jessica?"

"Yes, Edward?"

"It's Mr. Cullen. Have a nice day." Her mouth fell open as I turned and walked away. I knew where Bella lived so I decided to head over there to see if I could catch her. I'd looked her address up weeks ago right after she started work on the off chance that I might need it. I'd felt like a stalker but now I was glad I had it. I wasn't wasting another moment away from her. I just hoped she'd talk to me and not push me away. I had so much to explain to her.

I made my way to her door, stopping only momentarily before knocking. I waited a few moments then I heard some rustling behind the door and the door opened. A woman that looked slightly like Bella but older stood before me.

"Hello," she said with a big smile on her face.

"Um, hi. I was looking for Bella Swan. Is this her place?"

"Oh, yes it is! Come in!" I stepped into the apartment and was instantly assaulted with Bella's smell, all floral and fruity.

"Bella's not here right now but she should be back any moment. You can have a seat if you'd like and wait for her." I wasn't sure how this would look. I was waiting in her apartment for her after three months of not speaking. Maybe I should have just called first. Well, I was here now so I might as well wait, right? I looked over at the woman who was beaming up at me.

"I'm Bella's mother and you must be Edward," she stated with a nod. I couldn't believe she knew my name. I only nodded back in agreement unsure of what to say.

"Bella has told me all about you. She'll be glad you came by. Do you want something to drink while you wait?" I nodded again and watched as Bella's mother walked away toward the kitchen. I sat down to wait, stunned that Bella had talked about me to her mom. How awkward was that conversation? I mindlessly flipped through a magazine on the table not even taking notice of what it was when I heard laughter coming from the hallway. I knew right away it was Bella. The front door swung open and Bella walked in, and alongside her, Jacob.

My heart momentarily sank to my stomach as I watched her laugh at what he was saying. That should have been me making her laugh like that, not him. Apparently, I was too late.

"Mom, we're back!" she shouted from the doorway. She looked over in my direction, shock crossing her face at seeing me sitting on her couch. I stared back at her before looking over at Jacob seeing a similar look on his face.

"Jacob, can you go get me some water from the kitchen, please?" she asked. Jake looked at her, his face scrunched up in what appeared to be an internal debate.

"Are you sure, Bells? I can stay here..." She shook her head, hugging her jacket closer to her, her arms wrapped around her body.

"No, I'll be fine." Jacob nodded then walked away but not before staring me down.

"Hi, Edward," Bella whispered from the doorway.

"Bella." I stood up unsure of what to do. I definitely should have called first. This was more awkward than I'd thought it would be. My mind wandered to an escape route. I felt like I needed to abandon this ship and fast.

"Um, can you… can you follow me?" I looked at her, confused as to why I was supposed to follow her but then realized she probably didn't want her mom and boyfriend to overhear our conversation in the living room. In all honesty I didn't want an audience for this, either.

"Um, sure." She walked off in front of me her arms still around her middle and led me down a hallway and into a bedroom. The room was light and airy and just Bella. As I looked around the room noticing the big bed placed in the middle, I saw Bella out of the corner of my eye begin to take off her jacket. I turned to face her and offer my assistance, but was shocked at what I saw when the jacket had come off—a pregnant Bella.

My eyes widened at the sight of her belly, my mind instantly doing the calculations of our last time together. I was wondering if there wasn't something I was missing here.

"Edward." She sighed, sitting down on the bed. I looked from her belly to her face then back to her belly. "We need to talk."

*Whew* Ok that was it! Leave me reviews and let me know what you think! Want another EPOV? What do you think happens next? xox


	10. Chapter 10 Knuckle down

**A/N Hi! *ducks* Don't be mad at the delay! I'm so sorry! Between school, tubes for my son, finishing school, and my dad in the hospital it has been hard to finish this chapter but here it is! Good news? I'm done with school and my dad is doing good so lots of time to write. I already have Chapter 11 finished and shall be posting in the next day! ;) **

**Much thanks to my lovely beta coachlady12! She keeps me grounded in all my chaos. Please go check out her stories on her ff site they are amazing! She has a finished one Dangerous Corporate Liaisons and a WIP Guarding Bella Swan. Both awesome so go now! 2113307/coachlady1**

**Also need to thank the back bone to this fic: Joayla and 84Gemma! They are truly amazing ladies and I couldn't do it without their support! **

**Need to also thank Kas90_ for reading this for me! Check out her amazing story Family ties and guarding hearts on her FF page! /2109487/kas90**

**Also thanks to duckynoel for looking over! xox**

**Check out Joayla's wonderful stories on her ff site at: /1927725/joayla **

**Check out on my profile for song info and the lovely polyvore that 84Gemma did for the fic! **

**Also check out the banner that the talented rosalynn7885 made on the profile!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Not a single thing. All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of Stephenie Meyer. There is no copyright infringement intended.**

"I think I'm done gunning to get closer

To some imagined bliss

I got to knuckle down

And just be okay with this

I'm going to knuckle down

Just be okay with this

'course that star-struck girl is already someone I miss…"

"Knuckle Down" by Ani DiFranco

BPOV

It had been three months. Three long months since Edward had left for Chicago. No calls, no emails, nothing.

Part of me understood the silence. We hadn't left things on the best terms and I didn't expect him to call me the moment he got there, but I did expect something, anything. That part of me was furious. How could he not at least call me to ask how things were going? Or at the very least send me an email.

I had heard from Angela that something had gone terribly wrong with the new office, so he was completely swamped to the point that he ended up having to extend his trip an extra six weeks.

I chalked his non communication to how busy he was. Plus, we weren't in a relationship; hell, we'd barely had one full conversation before he left so expecting anything from him was futile on my part.

*_Flashback to six weeks ago*_

"_What do you expect from him, Bella?"_

"_I don't know, Alice. A phone call, an email, something!" We were out for lunch. I'd dropped the bomb of my pregnancy to my two best friends after my doctor's appointment a few weeks prior. _

"_Bella, you can't have expectations from him." She turned to look at me. "You weren't in any sort of relationship. Hell, when he left, you thought he was with Angela and he probably thought you were with Jacob."_

"_I told him I wasn't." _

"_Still, the way you said Jacob acted toward him he might not have believed you. Plus, it's not like he stuck around for any explanation." She was right as always. I sighed._

"_What should I do then, Alice?"_

"_I think you should call him."_

"_And say what exactly? 'Hey, how ya been? Long time no chat. By the way I'm pregnant and it's yours.' Yeah, no thanks," I took a long sip of my water._

"_Well, you _are_ going to tell him aren't you?" she asked. I nodded._

"_Yes, of course, Alice. I just wanted to do it in person."_

"_When is he due back then?" _

"_I'm not sure. Angela had said six weeks originally but now it's been extended. Hopefully, he'll be back next week or so..." _

_*End of flashback*_

A few more weeks passed, and Angela and I had grown closer. We ate lunch together frequently and discussed anything and everything. I learned about how she had met Edward originally and though they dated briefly, they soon realized they were better off as friends. When Edward introduced her to his best friend Ben, she knew that was it, that he was the one for her.

Today I was going in to work for a little while then off to shop with the girls for some maternity clothes. I was growing out of my clothes fast and I needed something for work. Alice and Rose were more than happy to take me out for a half day of shopping although if they had their way we'd go for a full day.

I wouldn't normally take half a day to shop, but I didn't want to run into Edward. I'd heard from Angela that he was back in town. She gushed about how great Edward had been for her and Ben Junior, and although the story made my heart melt it hurt at the same time. I knew at that moment I had to confront him. It was now or never.

Work went by fast and soon enough it was time to head to lunch with the girls, but before I left I made a pit stop to the bathroom. Since my bladder was now a trampoline, I always made sure to use the bathroom before I went anywhere.

Just as I was finishing up, the door of the bathroom opened and in walked Jessica and another woman. I could tell one was Jessica because her laugh was recognizable anywhere.

"So, I hear Edward's back in town," the woman stated. I looked through the crack and saw them stop at the vanity.

"Yes, I overheard from Bella that he was. I can't wait."

"You still have plans of nailing him?"

"Oh, honey, I've already nailed him. I just have to get him to realize that I'm the one," Jessica stated. Edward had been with Jessica?

"I didn't know you'd slept with him," the other stated, and as Jessica shifted, I realized the other voice belonged to Kate from downstairs.

"Yep, you aren't the only one who's been with him, you know," Jessica scoffed.

"I didn't say I was but last I heard you were still trying to get him to notice you. When did all this happen?"

"Oh, you know when he left for Vegas and came back all mopey?" When I heard "Vegas" my heart began to race.

"Yeah."

"Well, let's just say he wasn't sad after I paid him a visit." As I heard her words all I wanted to do was melt into the background. I didn't want to be privy to this conversation any longer.

"What are your plans then?" Kate asked.

"Oh, you'll have to wait and see. I don't spill my secrets."

"By the way what's up with Bella? She's getting huge!" Kate exclaimed.

"Right? You'd think there was more than one baby in there." Jessica laughed as they exited. I waited a few moments before I departed. Feeling slighted and angry, I made my way to lunch. When I arrived Alice and Rose were already waiting for me.

"Hey," I said unenthusiastically as I sat down with them.

"What's wrong, B?" Rose questioned.

"Why do you think something is wrong?" I looked down at my hands.

"Because we know you, Bella. What's going on?"

I sighed. "I overheard Jessica and Kate talking in the bathroom."

"Those cows? What the hell did they say?" Rose practically shouted.

"Nothing surprising, I guess. Just that Edward has apparently slept with both of them and that I was fat."

"Well, I wouldn't believe them about Edward. They sound like they're whores wanting attention and you're far from fat, Bella. You're pregnant!" I sighed again. Alice was right.

*_Flashback eight weeks ago*_

"_So, it's okay if he comes over to watch movies with us then?" Alice inquired. She wanted to bring Jasper over for our movie date. _

"_Alice, of course it's okay! I haven't really met him yet. I'd love for you to bring him over!" Thirty minutes later my doorbell rang and Alice and Jasper were on my doorstep. Jasper was tall and toned with sandy blond hair but his accent was what floored me. _

"_How are you, ma'am?" he asked kissing my hand sweetly and winking at me. I just looked at him as if he had three heads. Alice shoved him inside. _

"_Don't mind him, Bells. He thinks he's funny."After that I got to know more about Jasper. I learned that he was originally from Texas and how he became a dentist and was living in Seattle. And although I'd heard the story of Vegas from Alice, Jasper told me his version. _

"_I saw her across the room. She was the most beautiful woman I'd ever seen and I knew I had to talk to her. I walked up to her, kissed her hand then asked her to dance. We stayed up all night talking about life in a little diner down the street, and the rest is history." I looked over at Alice who was beaming. _

"_Oh, Alice," I said beginning to cry. Now Jasper was looking at me like I was crazy._

"_Sorry! Pregnancy hormones," I stated. Jasper just nodded his understanding. "Don't you think it's crazy that we all met guys in Vegas from Seattle?" I asked. _

"_Well, I have a confession." Alice said. She looked at me then Jasper shyly. "I saw Jasper at the convention I was at before the club." _

"_You did?" he asked. _

"_Yes, and I overheard you say you were going to the Vanity Club. I knew I had to go and meet you. I promise I'm not crazy. It's just when I saw you it felt like I'd been waiting for you forever and I had to find a way to see you again."_

"_Well, the feeling was mutual then." He leaned in and kissed her sweetly. _

"_But to answer your question, Bella, I do think it's crazy we all met guys from Seattle," Alice said. _

"_That is weird. My boys met some girls, too, at the club." I looked over to Jasper and wondered if it was possible he knew Edward._

"_What are your boys' names?" _

"_Well, there's big E and lil E." He laughed. I looked at him confused. _

"_It's an inside joke. I've known them since college. Big E is Emmett. We call him that because he's like a bear and lil E is Edward." Alice gasped. "His story is an interesting one..." Jasper trailed off looking at Alice and then over at me, realization crossing his face. _

"_So, let me guess. You're the amazing girl Edward met in Vegas..." I put my head in my hands and nodded. From there Jasper told us about the bachelor party and how Edward was the days after he left Vegas, after Bella. He touched on Ben briefly and how Edward had lost his shit afterward. Jasper told a lot of stories about all of them together but focused on Edward a lot. It was nice to have some insight on the man who still occupied my conscious even hundreds of miles away._

_*End of flashback*_

"Yeah, I know you're right." I sighed. "It's just infuriating to hear some of this stuff grapevine. I really need to talk to him and clear the air."

"When are you planning to do that?" Rose inquired.

"I'm planning on going by there tonight. I talked to Ang yesterday and she said she was coming home from the hospital today so I'm sure he'll head home at some point after."

"Do you think you'll invite him to the ultrasound next week?" Alice asked. My ultrasound to find out the sex was the following week. Alice had been accompanying me to my appointments since my first one. It was weird having Carlisle as my doctor knowing that he was the grandfather, so most of the appointments after the first one I made with his nurse practitioner, Heidi. I didn't want to change doctors because he was one of the best OB-GYNS in Seattle but I did try to avoid him as much as I could.

"I'm not sure. It depends on his reaction when I tell him."

Alice nodded. "What about your mom. Will she go still too?"

"I'm sure she will. She's extremely excited. She thinks it's a boy."

"I still say it's a girl," Alice chimed in. Rose shook her head.

"No way! It's totally a boy."

"Why do you fight me, Rose? You know I'm psychic!" They argued back and forth. Personally, I thought it was a boy with as much as the baby moved and kicked me. Just as we were finishing up, Jacob came up to our table.

"Ladies."

"Jake, what are you doing here?" I looked up at him.

"Well, _someone_ had to come carry your bags for you, silly," he said offering me his hand. Jacob hadn't taken the pregnancy news well at first.

*_Flashback ten weeks ago*_

"_I'm pregnant, Jake," I said when we had yet another confrontation about why we weren't together. _

"_Well, that's even more of a reason for us to be together." _

"_Jake, you don't understand."_

"_What's there to understand, Bella? You're pregnant with my baby. We should be together." _

"_It's not your baby, Jake." I looked over at him as he paced around the room and stopped. _

"_What do you mean it's not my baby? Don't you remember the night we spent together?"_

"_Yes, Jake, I remember, but it's not yours." _

"_I'm not understanding, Bella… whose baby is it then?"_

_I explained Vegas and what happened that night._

"_So, that doesn't mean it's that guy's, Bella. It could still be mine." _

"_I had my period after we were together, Jake, and the dates match with the dates I was with him." I sighed. "It's his." _

"_Who is this guy anyway? Is he even in the picture? You can't raise this baby by yourself." _

"_Who says I'm by myself? I have my mom and dad. Sue is also offering to help. Plus, Rose and Alice will be here." _

"_What about the guy?" _

"_He doesn't know yet," I whispered, walking into the kitchen suddenly embarrassed by my situation, but Jake didn't let up. He followed me. _

"_What do you mean he doesn't know?" _

"_I mean I haven't told him. The situation is slightly complicated." I sighed. _

"_Who is it? Do I know him?" he asked, slightly shocked that he might actually know who the father was. _

"_Edward."_

"_THAT JACKASS?" he screamed. _

"_Jake." _

"_I can't believe you slept with him. What the fuck were you thinking?" _

"_Jake."_

"_You work with him, Bella." _

"_I didn't work with him at the time."_

"_Still, you work with him now."_

"_So?" _

"_How's that going to go over? What if he doesn't want the baby? You work with him. Are you going to give up your job? Is he?"Honestly, I hadn't even thought of that. What if he didn't want the baby? What if he didn't want me? What was I going to do? As my mind reeled with questions, I reminded myself that I couldn't think of that now. What was done was done. _

"_Jake, I don't know. I can't change the past. This is what it is and I have to tell him. I'll take what comes after that." We continued to talk for a while. I told him how my mom was surprisingly ecstatic to be a grandma and was coming out to help. I told him how after the initial shock wore off, my dad was surprisingly supportive and, much to my surprise, Jake seemed to lighten up toward the end of our conversation. As I was walking him out, he turned around and grabbed my hand._

"_Bella, I just want you to know that if things don't work out with him I'll be here for you no matter what. Okay?" _

"_Thanks, Jake, that means a lot. It really does." I kissed his cheek as he wrapped his arms around me. _

"_I mean it, Bella."_

"_I know you do."_

_*End of flashback*_

We shopped for the afternoon and I found some great things to wear to work. Alice and Rose found some things as well. Jake was great and carried all of our stuff. After a few hours, however, my feet were hurting and I called it quits.

"Guys I'm going to head home. I'm exhausted and my mom's probably back by now so I should be a good host and entertain her."

"Ah, okay, Bella. We'll talk soon!" After hugs goodbye I walked back to my car with Jacob in tow with the bags. 

"Bella, mind if I come back to your place for a little while? I wanted to talk to you about something."

"Um, sure, Jake. I'm not going to be there for long, though. I'm going to try and see Edward this evening."

"I know. I know. I just wanted to talk to you briefly and see Mama Renee. She told me she'd make me some zucchini bread today, anyway. She's expecting me." I laughed at his nickname for her.

"Okay, follow me back then." When we got back to my apartment he gathered all my things and walked me up.

"Bella, before we get to your place can I say something?"

"Sure. What is it?"

"I just wanted to say thank you."

"Thank you for what?"

"Thank you for everything, for just being you and also thank you for your weird cravings."

"Jake, what in the world are you talking about?" We stopped in the hallway as he looked at me.

"I met someone," he stated.

"Really?"

He nodded. "Yes, you remember that night a few weeks ago you wanted ice cream so I went out and got you some?" I nodded. "Well, I met someone there. Her name is Nessie. She was behind me at the checkout. We got to talking and yeah."

"Oh, my God, Jake! That's amazing!" I hugged him fiercely, so happy he'd found someone.

"Well, that's not all," he said looking down. "I'm going to ask her to move in with me."

"What?" I yelled.

"I know she's the one, Bella. I found her. I'm not letting her go."

"You've only been dating two months!"

"I know, but when you know, you know."

"Wow," I whispered. "That's exciting."

"I wanted you to be the first to know. I owe it to you that we met. I wouldn't have been out that late and probably never had met her."

"I'm so happy for you, Jake. I really am." I hugged him tightly. "So, does this mean next step is marriage and I have to plan your bachelor party?" I said laughing at the image, me, a very pregnant girl, throwing my best friend's bachelor party.

"I think you should start planning now!" he said joining me in laughter. We opened the door and entered the apartment.

"Mom, we're back!" I shouted as we came in. As I turned toward the living room I saw Edward sitting on my couch. To say I was shocked was an understatement.

"Jacob, can you go get me some water from the kitchen, please?" I asked. Jake looked over at me, his face scrunched up in what I knew was his disapproval face.

"Are you sure, Bells? I can stay here..."

I shook my head, my arms instantly wrapping around my body, hiding my baby bump. "No, I'll be fine." Jacob nodded then walked away.

"Hi, Edward," I whispered from the doorway, not moving from my spot.

"Bella," he said as he stood up. He looked like he wanted to run. Had he seen the baby bump already? Well, it was now or never.

"Um, can you… can you follow me?" I asked looking at him. He looked back at me confused but started to follow me anyway. I didn't want to have this conversation with Jacob and my mom present.

"Um, sure," he stated as I walked off in front of him. My arms wrapped around my middle as I led him down my hallway and into my bedroom. As I entered into the room I gave myself an internal pep talk. _I can do this. I can do this. I have to do this._ I began to take my jacket off when Edward turned around to face me.

His eyes widened at the sight of my belly, his face unreadable as he stared.

"Edward." I sighed, sitting down on the bed. He looked from my belly to my face then back to my belly. "We need to talk."

**Next chapter to be posted soon! It's already done just tweaking. How about EPOV next? Yes or Fuck Yes? Let me know what you think the baby is and names! **


	11. Chapter 11 Should I stay or should I go

**A/N Sorry for the delay with this chapter…It was written as I said, but I had a family emergency come up that kept me away. Unfortunately I lost my father on Christmas Eve. My heart physically aches for him and I will miss him greatly. Please remember to hold those you love close because you never know when it's their last…**

**We are getting further in the story now… I might go past 15 chapters. Outline has recently been changed. **

**BTW this is EPOV and BPOV! **

**Mucho gracious to my h00r beta coachlady12! She makes fun of me daily but I lubs her anyway.;) Please go check out her stories on her ff site they are amazing! She has a finished one Dangerous Corporate Liaisons and a WIP Guarding Bella Swan. Both awesome so go now! 2113307/coachlady1**

**Also need to thank the back bone to this fic: Joayla and 84Gemma! They are truly amazing ladies and I couldn't do it without their support! **

**Also thanks to duckynoel for looking over! xox**

**Check out Joayla's wonderful stories on her ff site at: /1927725/joayla **

**Check out on my profile for song info and the lovely polyvore that 84Gemma did for the fic! **

**Also check out the banner that the talented rosalynn7885 made on the profile!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Not a single thing. All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of Stephenie Meyer. There is no copyright infringement intended.**

"_Darling you got to let me know  
Should I stay or should I go?  
If you say that you are mine  
I'll be here 'til the end of time  
So you got to let me know  
Should I stay or should I go?"_

_Should I stay or should I go by The Clash_

EPOV

"Will you sit down?" she asked patting the spot on the bed next to her. I crossed the space between us and sat down. I was stunned into silence. I wasn't sure what to think. Could she really be pregnant? I could take her being with Jacob because I could still have hope of our being together in the future, but pregnant with his child. That changed everything.

"First of all, I want to apologize. I should have told you sooner. I should have called you the moment I got confirmation and I didn't. I also had plenty of time since then to tell you but never found the courage." She looked at me to make sure I was following her. "In my defense I thought you were with Angela up until right after you left. Although I now know how wrong I was to assume that and I'm sorry about that as well..." I took a moment to digest the things she was saying.

"Wait. What are you talking about?" I asked.

"Um, what?" she questioned.

"What are you talking about?" I turned to look at her.

"I'm trying to explain to you why I didn't tell you about the baby."

"What?"

"The baby."

"What about the baby?"

"That it's yours."

"Mine?" I asked my voice rising an octave.

"Yes," she said.

"What? Are you sure it's mine?" How was that possible?

"Yes, I'm sure," she stated sounding slightly offended.

"When? How?" I asked, standing up, my mind suddenly reeling with tons of questions.

"Um, Vegas," she practically whispered.

"I meant how did this happen? Weren't we safe?"

She looked away and looked back at me. "I vaguely remember a moment when something happened."

I thought back. That whole trip was marred with drunkenness. I barely remembered our encounter let alone all the minute details. I began pacing.

"And you're sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure. Listen, I know we don't know each other that well, but I'm not a whore." She crossed her arms around her and glared at me. I paced some more contemplating her statements and attempting to do the math. We were in Vegas in December and we were now in April that made her at least four months pregnant. I stopped and looked at her.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

She huffed. "I was just telling you that I didn't know how to tell you."

"You could have picked up the phone or emailed me!" I said louder than I expected. I couldn't help but think she knew all this time and never told me.

"And say what exactly? 'Hey, Edward, how are you? Oh, and by the way I'm pregnant and it's yours?" She jumped up, her nostrils flaring and her breath speeding up.

"Yes! Anything! I needed to know!"

"I'm telling you now! Doesn't that count? Besides it's not like we ever really had much of a conversation before you left!" She had a point. I couldn't process the information she was giving me. I had to get out and clear my head.

"What are we going to do?" I inquired.

"I'm not sure." She sighed looking down at her feet. Flashes of a happy Bella and I with our baby flashed through my mind.

"I have to go," I said, heading for the door. Her head snapped up and we made eye contact.

"What?" she asked.

"I have to go."

"Why?"

I walked back down the hall and toward the front door.

"Why?" she asked again.

I couldn't even begin to explain to her all the things going through my mind. A baby? The late nights, the spitting up, the crying…was I really ready for all the responsibilities? I thought I had been when it was just an idea in my head, but now that idea had materialized and was standing directly in front of me I wasn't so sure.

"Will you be back?" she asked. Her cheeks were stained with tears. I leaned forward and wiped them away.

"Of course. I just need some time." She nodded in understanding.

"Just so you know there's an ultrasound next week to find out the sex."

I nodded minutely.

"Thank you for telling me." I kissed her forehead. "I'll call you soon, okay?" She nodded again. I walked out of the apartment and toward my car. My heart ached. Part of me wanted to run back and tell her it was going to be okay, but the other part knew I needed a moment to process the news.

I drove around the city to clear my head. Bella was pregnant… with my child. I knew I wanted to be a dad but I didn't think it would happen this fast. I drove around for what felt like hours and before I realized it I was pulling up into a familiar driveway.

I walked up the steps and into the entryway.

"Edward, is that you?"

"Hi, mom." I wrapped my arms around her and gave her a huge hug. She let go looking up at me raising an eyebrow.

"To what do I owe this honor?" she asked pulling me toward the kitchen.

"What, can't I just come visit my mom and say hi?" She looked toward me.

I sighed. "Is dad home?" I asked.

"He should be home soon. He's just finishing his shift at the hospital."

"Okay then."

"What's all this about Edward?" she asked tentatively. At that moment I heard my father come through the garage.

"Hi, honey, I'm home," my dad said walking over and kissing my mother on her cheek.

"Edward, nice to see you, son." He reached over and gave me a quick pat on my back.

"Dad," I said nodding at him.

"So, what's going on, Edward?" he asked settling into one of the barstools.

"Why would something be going on? Can't a son visit his parents?" I asked settling in next to him. Both my parents stopped to look at me.

"Okay, okay. I have some news." I sighed running my hands through my hair.

"Yes?" my mom inquired as she began preparing for dinner. I wasn't exactly sure how to broach this topic so I decided blunt would be the best route.

"I'm going to be a dad." My mother stopped her movement and my dad looked at me.

"Oh, really?" he said. My mother turned around to face me.

"How's this possible?" my mom asked, so I explained Vegas to her.

"So, this is from a one-night stand?" she asked bewildered.

"Sort of. Technically, yes." She shook her head and sighed.

"What are you going to do?" my dad asked.

"I don't know. I mean I'm excited but scared shitless."

"Watch your language."

"Sorry, Mom, but it's true."

"What's her name?" my mom inquired.

"Bella Swan," I said. My dad stiffened slightly beside me and I knew that she had to be one of his patients. I didn't even have to ask.

"When do I get to meet her?" Mom inquired.

"Soon. I'm still trying to process all this information. She's four months pregnant and I'm just now finding out."

"Why'd she wait so long to tell you?" my mom asked going back to work on dinner.

"She was worried at my reaction and she thought for awhile that Angela and I were together."

My mother stopped and looked at me again. "Really?"

I nodded.

"Well, you and Angela _are_ close. I can see how someone might misinterpret that."

"What are you planning to do?" my dad asked taking a sip of his drink seemingly getting over the news.

"I'm not sure. I told her I needed time to think but that I would call her." My dad nodded looking in the opposite direction.

"Well, I know it's not the most ideal situation but it is what it is." He looked at me and shrugged then walked away. Although he wasn't a man of many words, these he'd said definitely made sense.

I spent that night going over everything, from our night in Vegas when I saw her across the room and just had to have her. Her beautiful, long brown hair and outfit that highlighted all of her best assets.

Then my mind wandered to the club in Seattle and how shocked and excited I felt to run into her again and feel her again. Then she showed up on my turf at my work as a coworker. I could see her and talk to her every day. It was a like a dream come true.

Since the moment I'd met this girl my thoughts had been centered on her. How she was, what she was doing, where she was. I wanted her in my life any way I could have her, and now I'd found out she was pregnant with my baby. Was I ready? Could I do it? _Would_ I do it? And for the first time in months my answer was an unwavering "Yes."

When I awoke the next morning after our conversation I knew I needed to talk to her. I had full intentions of going to her that day; however, when I awoke my phone exploded and I was immediately swamped with work. A case I was working had taken an unexpected turn and caused me to work day and night straight for the next few days.

After three days I was finally free from work obligations and on my way to see Bella.

BPOV

Three days. Three days since I had heard from him. When he said he would call, I figured it would be later that night or the next day. I had taken off work for the rest of the week claiming illness. I couldn't face Edward and his rejection.

When he left I wasn't surprised. I knew this had caught him off guard but I didn't think it would take him this long to respond.

It was now Saturday and I was getting ready to meet the girls and Jacob for lunch. As I was putting the finishing touches on my makeup I heard a knock on the door.

"Come in," I yelled thinking Jacob was early to pick me up. I leaned forward in the mirror expecting Jacob to come into my room at any moment and complain that I was taking too long. When he didn't appear in the doorway I went searching for him.

"Jake?" I called. "Are you there?" I walked into the living room and gasped. There in my living room stood Edward holding a bouquet of lavender roses and a teddy bear.

"Edward, what are you doing here?" I asked unable to move from where I stood. He sauntered over to me. I looked up at him for an explanation.

"Bella, I know this wasn't expected by either of us but I wanted you to know that I want this. I want all of this. I'm ready." My eyes filled with tears as I saw him kneel. "Please say you still want me to be part of this?" All I could do was nod as my tears overflowed. He leaned forward looking up for me for permission. I nodded in agreement as he leaned further and kissed my stomach. His hand came forward and smoothed over my skin.

"Hi, baby. It's me. Your daddy. I'm going to take good care of you and your mother. I promise." At that moment the baby decided to respond by kicking for the first time. Edward looked up at me in surprise.

"I think the baby likes you," I said giggling. Edward rose up off his knees and kissed me sweetly on the lips.

"I hope so." He sighed pulling away "And I hope you do, too."

"Of course," I answered almost immediately.

"Will you go out with me Bella?" He asked suddenly. I looked up at him searching his eyes.

"As in a date?" I asked.

"Yes. Will you go on a date with me?" he asked grabbing my hand in his and kissing it sweetly.

"Yes, Edward, I'll go on a date with you." I leaned forward capturing his lips as his arms encircled my waist. As we continued to kiss and his hands started to wander I heard the front door open and close and a familiar voice ring out.

"Bella?" Jacob yelled. "Are you ready to go?" I felt Edward stiffen as he pulled away and Jacob came into view.

"What's this asshole doing here?" Jake asked.

"Jake," I warned.

"What, Bella?"

"Don't do this," I stated.

"Do what? Call a sheep a sheep?" he huffed. Edward turned to face Jacob.

"Jacob, I'm not sure what your problem with me is, but you'll have to come to terms with the fact that I'm in Bella's life now no matter what."

"Yeah, I know that, asshole, because you're the biological father. Yada yada."

"Jake!" I whisper yelled. "What the fuck is your problem?"

"I don't have a problem, Bells. I just want him to know his place. He can't saunter in here and act like he's something when he's not."

"And what place is that?" Edward asked.

"Just know that although you may be the biological father that doesn't mean anything these days." Jacob stared Edward down.

"Listen, Jacob. I'm here for the long haul no matter what. You'd better get used to that fact."

"We'll see," Jake scoffed. "Did she tell you that we were together?"

"Jake," I warned again. I was seriously close to ripping his head off. Why in the hell would he bring that shit up?

"Wait, Bells, he needs to hear this," Jacob said looking toward Edward. "Did you know that Bella and I have had sex?" he asked.

"I figured as much," Edward answered nonchalantly.

"Did you know that I slept with her right before Vegas?" Edward's eyes went big at the mention of Vegas. I was trying to figure out the fuck Jacob was trying to accomplish.

"What the fuck, Jake?" I gasped in disbelief.

"He needs to know this, Bella. I slept with her before Vegas and although you _might_ be the biological father, I have and will always come first. I've been there for her through the morning sickness and the cravings. Don't think that just because you're back that I'm going anywhere. Got it?"

I looked over at Edward to see his face pale and the familiar, confused look cross his face. I could tell that he was wondering if the baby was really his or not and contemplating Jacob's statement. I hated Jake for bringing this up but in the grand scheme of things it was good that he knew now about us. Jake was a big part of my life and Edward would have to get used to that. However, Jake would have to realize that Edward was in my life now no matter what.

As the words appeared to sink in, Edward looked over at Jake then back at me. He stood up and walked toward me, his hands in his pockets. I wasn't sure what to expect from him at this point. He could believe me and accept that this was his baby or he could think I was a liar and ditch us. Either way I could understand. It's not like I gave him a lot of reasons to trust me. As he moved closer, I tried to anticipate his decision. Was he staying? Was he going? What I didn't expect was what he did next.


	12. Chapter 12 Until we bleed

**A/N Hi all! Hope all is well! Here is Chapter 12! As you can tell I've been busy writing O/s for my loverlys birthdays! Go check them out if you haven't already! Chapter 13 is well on its way to being posted and I'm also posting a new fic that you should check out as well! **

**This chapter is EPOV and BPOV too! **

**Mucho gracious to my beta h00r coachlady12 who recently had a bday and needs spankings just fyi! but I lubs her… Please go check out her stories on her ff site they are amazing! She has a finished one Dangerous Corporate Liaisons and a WIP Guarding Bella Swan. Both awesome so go now! 2113307/coachlady1**

**Also need to thank: 84Gemma and duckynoel for looking over this chappy for me! I love you both so much! **

**Check out on my profile for song info and the lovely polyvore that 84Gemma did for the fic! **

**Also check out the banner that the talented rosalynn7885 made on the profile!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Not a single thing. All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of Stephenie Meyer. There is no copyright infringement intended.**

"_Doors slam  
Lights black  
You're gone  
Come back  
Stay gone  
Stay clean  
I need you to need me_

So we're bound to linger on  
We drink the fatal drop  
Then love until we bleed  
Then fall apart in parts

Now we're bound to linger on  
We drink the fatal drop  
Then love until we bleed  
Then fall apart in parts"

_Until we bleed by Lykke Li_

EPOV

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. My mind reeled with questions. Could the baby really not be mine? Jacob said he and Bella had been together right before Vegas, so it was possible it was his? But why would Bella tell me it was mine if it wasn't? Why would she go through all that trouble if it wasn't the truth?

As the statement sank in, I looked over at Jake, trying to figure out why he thought he needed to tell me this now. In a way I was happy he did. It was something I needed to know but why here and now? I figured they had been together, that wasn't a surprise, but I didn't know it had been so recent. I held my hands because as much as I wanted to punch him I knew that wouldn't sit well with Bella.

I looked over at Bella. She was standing there biting her lip, ringing her hands together nervously. Yes, it was weird that she had been with Jacob so close to being with me, but I wasn't a saint either. It would have been easy for her to say it was Jake's even if it wasn't, but here she was attempting to tell me the truth.

I knew what I had to do. It was now or never. I stood up and walked toward her, my hands in my pockets. I wasn't sure how this would play out, but I wanted to try. I had to try. I had to prove to her that I was here and I wasn't going anywhere.

As I stopped in front of her I could see the internal battle raging behind her eyes. She was worried. I reached out and cupped her face gently, rubbing her cheek with my thumb, trying to assure her through my touch that everything would be okay. The surprise at my affection was evident on her face.

I leaned forward and captured her lips, her hands immediately wrapping around my neck. Her lips were just as I remembered them, soft and sweet. I swept my tongue across her lower lip, tasting her cherry lip gloss. She moaned in response pressing her body further into mine and as we deepened the kiss, Jacob was all but forgotten. I kissed her passionately, pouring all my emotions out to her.

"As much as I'd love to stay and watch y'all make out, we do have some place to be, Bella." Bella and I parted, Bella looking over to where Jacob stood then looking back up at me.

"I'm sure the girls will understand if I don't show up."

"Bella, you've got to be kidding me with this." He sighed.

"Jake, you know you'll always be in my life and I'm grateful for all that you've done for me especially lately, but Edward is the father and if he wants to be around then I'm going to let him."

"I know Bella. I know... I just worry about you that's all. I just want to make sure you'll be okay." He hung his head, staring at his feet.

"She will be. I'll take good care of her Jacob. I promise." I pulled Bella into my side. "I'll take care of both of them." My hand landed on her stomach.

"Jake, I'm going to be fine. I promise. I think you should start putting all that energy of worrying about me into your relationship with Nessie, though." She walked over and gave him a hug.

"Yeah, you're right," he stated quietly, wrapping his arms around her in return. They talked inaudibly with each other for a few moments before Jacob walked toward me.

"I'm sorry, man. I'm just really protective of her," he confessed holding his hand out.

"I understand. I am, too, but I promise I'll take care of them."

He nodded as I shook his hand. "You'd better."

As Bella walked him toward the door I made my way into the kitchen; this situation suddenly had me parched. As I entered I noticed an ultrasound picture hanging on the fridge. I reached for it and stared, tracing the bean shape over and over with my finger. I couldn't believe that this tiny thing was my baby.

"That was taken at eight weeks," Bella said as she walked into the kitchen.

"And you said you have another one coming up?"

"Yes, in two days." She nodded.

"Can I come?" She smiled.

"Of course, we'll find out the sex then."

I walked over and wrapped my arms around her. "What do you think the sex is?" I asked rubbing her stomach.

"I think it's a boy."

"Really?" She nodded. "Why's that?" I asked.

"He moves around a lot and uses my bladder as a trampoline." I couldn't help but laugh at her description.

"Thought of any names yet?"

"A few but I'm kind of hoping you could help me with that part."

I leaned forward and kissed her sweetly. "Absolutely." I hugged her closely. "So, when can I take you out on this date?"

"When do you want to go?"

"Tonight," I said without hesitating.

"Um, I don't think so." She laughed. "But we can go tomorrow?"

"Deal." I kissed her forehead and then returned the picture to its place on the fridge.

"So, what do you want to do now?" she questioned.

"I have a few ideas," I replied, wiggling my eyebrows at her.

"Not going to happen," she stated swatting at my chest. "I'm being serious."

"Why don't we relax and watch a movie? I'll order something for lunch. Chinese food sound okay?" I asked grabbing her hand and leading her toward the living room.

"Oh, that reminds me. I have to tell Alice and Rose that I'm not going to be there for lunch." She sprinted off toward the bedroom. "You can pick out a movie. I'll be right back. Oh, and no seafood; baby doesn't like it." I laughed at her mention of the baby. There was a lot I would have to learn.

I spent the rest of the afternoon over at Bella's, lounging around watching movies and eating Chinese. We caught each other up on what had been going on the last few months.

"Ah, he's really cute." Bella sighed when I showed her pictures of Ben, Jr.

"He's handsome not cute."

She laughed. "Whatever. He's cute. I hope Angela is doing okay," she said.

"She's doing as best she can. She's happy to have the baby but I know she's missing Ben." I put my cell phone back in my pocket and returned my attention to Bella's feet.

"So, where are you taking me tomorrow?"

"It's a surprise, but I would dress up if I were you."

"'Dress up dress up?' Like a dress?" she asked surprised.

"Yes. Why, will that be a problem?"

"I don't have anything like that to wear." She moaned.

"Well, why don't you go out with the girls and do some shopping? I've actually got to head in to the office for a bit then go by Angela's." I stood up and stretched, walking toward the door.

"Do you really have to go?" She pouted. I leaned forward and kissed her.

"Yes, but I'll be by tomorrow night to pick you up. Say seven o'clock?" She nodded. I kissed her hand and waved goodbye. I couldn't help the excitement boiling up inside me. Things finally seemed to be falling into place.

BPOV

"It's absolutely stunning, Rose!" I exclaimed as I ran my fingers over the light blue fabric. "Where did you get it?"

"I saw it when we were out shopping and I knew you'd look perfect in it." She walked over and sat next to me on the couch. I was holding a sheer blue dress with a sweetheart neckline that would be perfect for my date with Edward tomorrow.

"It's perfect," I stated.

"I know." She smiled.

"How did you know?" I asked laying the dress over the arm of the couch.

"Well, Alice and I saw it and thought you'd look great in it so we bought it. We didn't tell you because we knew you would have said no."

"But how did you know I'd need a dress?"

"You know Alice. She's like a girl scout when it comes to fashion."

"Ah, yes, always prepared for anything."

"Yep, don't be surprised when she brings by maternity underwear and bathing suits later."

"Maternity bathing suits?" I sighed. "Well, thanks for the warning."

"Anytime." She winked.

"So, how are things with you and Emmett?" I asked leaning back and turning toward her.

"Good. Great, actually." She placed her cup down on the table.

"Does he think it's weird that we all met in Vegas and ended up here together?" I questioned.

She laughed. "He thinks it's amazing, actually. He can't believe it took them till Vegas to find us but he's happy they did."

"What does he think about the baby?"

"He's not surprised that Edward knocked you up."

"How come?" I asked.

She sighed. "Please don't be angry."

"Okay." Now I was really curious.

"Well, apparently the condoms Edward had were meant to be a joke and not actually used."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Emmett bought them for Edward as a joke because he had been going through a dry spell and Emmett thought Vegas would cure him of that."

"So, why would I be angry that Emmett bought him condoms?"

"He bought them from a gas station and he didn't even check the date. The ones he had in his hotel room were expired and he thinks Edward's might have been too."

I wasn't exactly sure how to take this information. Should I be mad? "So, how are you not pregnant?" I asked curiously.

"We bought new ones in the lobby after he realized the date. He didn't even think to warn Edward. I'm so sorry, Bella." She placed her hand on my knee and began rubbing soothing circles. After learning this information I couldn't find it in myself to be angry. Things happen and if I sat here saying 'coulda, shoulda, woulda,' I'd get nowhere.

"Rose, it's okay. Really." I patted her hand. "I guess Edward and I have Emmett to thank. Maybe we should name the baby after him?" And with that we laughed.

Later, Alice came over to help me get ready. My mom was back from her numerous shopping excursions she'd been going on and brought me a sterling silver music note necklace.

"I know how much you love music. Call it a good luck charm though you won't need it," she stated handing me the necklace.

"Thanks, Mom." I hugged and kissed her. I was so happy she was here to support me.

Edward showed up right at seven as promised. He looked absolutely stunning in his suit that I could almost devour him.

"Hey, beautiful," he stated when I came to the door.

"Hey, yourself," I said as he leaned in and kissed me.

"Hi, Edward! You look handsome!" Alice declared from the couch.

"Thanks," he said slightly caught off guard.

"Oh, I'm sorry I forgot." I pulled him further into the apartment. "Alice, Rose, this is Edward." +

They came over to shake his hand.

"Nice to finally meet you," Rose said.

"Likewise," he replied taking both their hands.

"Oh there he is!" My mom bellowed walking up to Edward and encompassing him in a hug.

"And you've met my mom." I laughed at his expression as my mom accosted him in my living room.

"Yes, I have. It's nice to see you again Ms..."

"Mrs. Dwyer," she answered.

"Yes, Mrs. Dwyer."

"Well, you kids have fun. Don't do anything I wouldn't do."

"Mom," I warned hoping she wouldn't embarrass me.

"Bye, guys. Have fun." Rose and Alice walked over and hugged me goodbye.

"So, where are we going?" I inquired linking arms with Edward as we made our way down to the car.

"It's a surprise."

"Do I get any hints?" I asked.

"Mm, we'll be eating with sticks," he answered.

"Chinese?"

"Nope." He opened the car door for me and I slid in. Eating with sticks? This should be interesting. As we drove to the restaurant I thought of all the places we could be going. When he pulled up in front of the Melting Pot, I was immediately excited.

"I've always wanted to come here!" I exclaimed hopping as best I could out of the car, taking the hand of the valet.

"I thought so. It's really good." And that wasn't a lie. Over the rest of the evening we enjoyed our fondue and relaxed into an easy conversation. He told me about his childhood and how he, Jasper, and Emmett had become friends. I told him about my childhood and how Alice, Rose, and I had become friends.

We swapped story for story and at the end of the night I felt like I had known him for years. As we approached my apartment door I was suddenly nervous. Do I invite him in? Do I want him to come in?

"I had a really good time tonight," he said his hands landing on my waist.

"I did, too," I replied. "Would you like to come in?"

He shook his head. "As much as I'd love to I can't. I don't trust myself."

"What do you mean?" I asked placing my hands on his shoulders.

"This is our first date. I'd like to do this right and if I come in I won't be able to keep my hands off of you."

"That's not a bad thing," I whispered pulling him closer.

"Bella," he warned. "Please." I knew what he was saying and as much as I appreciated his statement I couldn't help myself. I was pregnant and hornier than ever. I pulled him down and kissed him passionately, weaving my hands into his hair. I needed to feel him close to me. His hands went straight to kneading my backside. I could feel his desire radiating from him in waves. He wanted me, too, but after a few moments he pulled away.

"Bella, if we continue I won't be able to stop and we need to stop." He panted.

"I don't want to stop." I pouted. He reached up and smoothed my cheek.

"I don't want to either but we really need to give ourselves a chance here. For the baby." And of course I knew he was right.

I sighed. "I know, I know." I kissed him one last time hoping he'd change his mind though I knew he wouldn't.

"Good night, Bella. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Good night." And with that he left.

After a fitful night sleep, I awoke the next morning to a knock on my door. I trudged over and opened it to find a smiley Edward.

"You should have just stayed if you were going to wake me at this ungodly hour." I yawned.

"Bella, it's ten o'clock."

I gasped when I realized I had over slept. The appointment was in an hour. "Oh shit." I ran around like a mad woman getting dressed and taking my vitamins. I was happy when Edward produced a muffin from a brown paper bag as we climbed into his awaiting car.

"Thank you, you are a life saver."

He leaned over and kissed me sweetly. "I told you I'd take care of you." As we pulled up to the doctor's office I was suddenly anxious.

"You okay?" he asked turning to look at me.

"Yeah." I nodded. "I think so, just general nerves."

"Everything will be okay." He reached out and squeezed my hand. I was happy he decided to come with me. I knew my mom wanted to come, too, but she was just as excited to shop for the new baby and she thought it best if we did this alone, together.

"Let's go." We walked into the office. Edward immediately going to the receptionist to let them know I was here. He apparently knew the girl behind the counter because she laughed at the sight of him. I tried to control my jealousy but I couldn't help it with the way she was looking at him.

"Isabella Swan," the nurse said. I guess knowing the son of your doctor will get you in faster. After getting weighed and having my blood pressure checked we were escorted back to the ultrasound room.

"So, are we ready to check the baby out?" the lady asked.

"Where's Dr. Cullen?" I asked but before she could say anything Edward answered for her.

"He doesn't do these ultrasounds; the tech does. Plus, I think he's allowing his colleague to take over your case, something to do about ethics." Oh, that's right. It is his grandchild. I laid back and rolled my jeans downs.

"Let's take a look, shall we," the tech said. She squirted cold blue stuff all over my stomach. I was instantly glad they didn't have to do another internal exam.

"Okay, so here's the head." She clicked a few times, highlighting the head and measuring.

"He's got a big head just like his dad," Edward said chuckling.

"Don't joke about that," I said still in awe at seeing our baby on the screen. After a few more measurements the tech moved the wand around some more.

"Well, the baby is being kind of shy today but I'm sure with a little more persistence we can find out the sex. Would you guys like to know?" I nodded. Edward squeezed my hand as she moved the wand some more.

"Well, well, what have we here," she said ecstatically stopping the wand over an area on my stomach and zooming in. Edward and I couldn't keep our eyes off the screen as we waited with bated breath to find out the sex of our bundle of joy.

**A/N sooo what is the baby's name and should the baby be named after Emmett? Let me know! *muah* **


	13. Chapter 13 Unwritten

**A/N Hey there! Here's chapter 13. My overseas wifers stated that I was evil for ending this chapter this way. However, to make it up to you I will be posting Chapter 14 today as well. That's why the delay in posting. I didn't want to leave y'all hanging yet again…so enjoy! **

**Mucho gracious to my beta h00r coachlady12...I lubs her… She makes my words prettah.. seriously…;) Please go check out her stories on her ff site they are amazing! She has a finished one Dangerous Corporate Liaisons and a WIP Guarding Bella Swan. Both awesome so go now! 2113307/coachlady1**

**Also need to thank: 84Gemma, ducknynoel, and joayla for looking over this chappy for me! I love y'all so much! **

**Check out on my profile for song info and the lovely polyvore that 84Gemma did for the fic! **

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**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Not a single thing. All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of Stephenie Meyer. There is no copyright infringement intended.**

_I break tradition  
Sometimes my tries  
Are outside the lines_

We've been conditioned  
To not make mistakes  
But I can't live that way, no

Staring at the blank page before you  
Open up the dirty window  
Let the sun illuminate the words  
That you could not find

_Unwritten by Natasha Bedingfield  
_

BPOV

It was two weeks after the ultrasound and I had an itch. I knew Edward was trying to be a gentleman and wait but I couldn't wait any longer. Where was the man that claimed me in Vegas multiple times then again in the club? I was bound and determined to find him. Edward and I had agreed to stay at each other's places, alternating between the two, until we figured out another solution.

I was currently at his place waiting for him to return home from work. I had left long before he had and waited patiently for him in his bedroom. I knew he was busy with a new case, but I really wanted him here, I needed him. After waiting another half an hour and he still hadn't shown, I decided to call him to see when he was coming back.

"Hello?" a breathy female answered. I looked at my cell phone to make sure I had dialed the right number. Yep, it was his cell number.

"Um, hello, is Edward there?" I asked silently panicking.

"He stepped out for a moment. Can I take a message?" The woman giggled. Yes, giggled. If I could, I would cut a bitch through the phone.

"No, that's fine." I quickly hung up before I could hear anything else. I didn't want to hear anything else. This was unbelievable. So, he wouldn't have sex with me but he could have sex with her? I knew he couldn't wait. What Jessica and that girl said in the bathroom that day at work must have been true. Why was I so dense? Of course, he wouldn't want to have sex with a fat, pregnant chick.

I began to pace, contemplating my next move. Do I stay and confront him or do I leave and ignore him? The big part of me wanted to wait and punch him, but I also knew that I was emotional and I didn't want him to see me cry. I wandered back to his bedroom and started packing up my stuff. I couldn't stay here, not like this. Just as I was finishing packing what little amount I had there, I heard the front door open and shut. Shit. I was trying to get out of there before he returned.

I pulled the suitcase off the bed as he entered into the bedroom, his tie already undone, his hands working on the buttons of his shirt. He stopped when he saw me, looking between me and the bag then back again.

"What's going on?" he asked his face full of confusion.

"I'm leaving," I stated as I straightened the suitcase onto its wheels and tried to walk past him.

He reached out and grabbed my wrist, effectively stopping my escape. "I can see that but why?"

"Let me go," I whispered. I was trying desperately not to cry in front of him but I was failing miserably. As a lone tear fell down my cheek, Edward pulled the suitcase from my grasp and escorted me over to the bed. Sitting me down, he knelt between my legs, his eyes searching my face for answers. I couldn't hold it in any longer, I was officially sobbing now.

"What's going on Bella? Is something wrong with the baby?"

I shook my head as I bawled even more.

"What is it? Please tell me. I can't fix it if you won't tell me." He grabbed my hands but I pulled them away. I didn't want his touch. He placed his hands on either side of my hips, staring at me intently, waiting for an answer. However, I couldn't answer. My voice was completely gone, my emotions overriding my ability to speak. All I could do was hand him my cell phone.

Confused, he looked at me then the phone. Getting what I was implying he began to go through my call log. After a moment he looked back at me.

"You called me?" I nodded, wiping the snot away with the back of my sweatshirt. "I didn't know you called. It says it went through. Did someone answer?" I nodded again, looking down at my hands now in my lap. He stood up immediately and began to pace. My heart sank all over again at his response.

"I can't believe this," he uttered. I guess I had my answer. I began to rise when Edward was at my feet again.

"Bella, don't go. It's a misunderstanding. I'm guessing Tanya answered my phone when I left to go to the bathroom. She's the other attorney on the case from the other law office. There is nothing between us. Nothing! I swear!" I took a moment to ponder this information. I had seen Tanya once or twice while Edward was out. She had been working with some other attorneys in the office and she was beautiful.

"You don't have to lie to me." I sighed.

"I'm not."

"Then why was she giggling into the phone?" I inquired, my voice going up an octave, my anger flaring again.

"I don't know. Maybe she was giggling at her partner that came to pick her up." Her partner, what partner? She wasn't partner at the law firm. Seeing my confusion Edward smiled and continued. "Tanya's partner, she's a lesbian. Her partner, Irina, was there to pick her up when I came back from the restroom. They were giggling at some nonsense, I'm sure, who knows." He rolled his eyes. "I didn't know that she had answered my phone, though. I'm sure she would have told me if she hadn't been otherwise occupied," he mumbled, his face slightly amused at the situation.

"So, you aren't sleeping with her then?"

"No! Of course not! I can't believe you would think that. I told you I wanted to be with you and only you."

"Yeah, but why won't you touch me?" I questioned pushing back onto the bed, my hair falling to cover my face.

"You think I don't want to touch you?" I nodded not looking up at him. I felt the bed move as Edward sat beside me and brushed my hair away. He pulled me into his lap, my legs went to either side of him, and my nose was aligned to his neck.

"Baby, I definitely want to touch you. It's all I can think about." He leaned forward and nibbled my ear, I groaned. "But I was trying to take this slow so we can give this an honest chance. I told you that," he began.

"I know. I know. I just let my thoughts get the better of me." I wrapped my arms around him and placed my face in the crook of his neck.

"Why would you think that?" he asked quietly. I was embarrassed to mention why my mind had immediately jumped to such a conclusion but I couldn't deny that I was curious.

"Right before you came back I overhead Jessica and Kate from downstairs talking in the bathroom." At my statement he stiffened slightly. "They were talking about you and having sex with you." I swallowed loudly, my throat was suddenly dry. Did I really want to know the answer to this?

"They said they had sex with me?" I nodded my head, my eyes finding his. He cupped my face and held my stare.

"Bella, I have never slept with either of them and honestly I'm not sure why they said anything like that. It's maddening."

"You never had any involvement with either of them?" I inquired. Were they completely full of shit?

"I went on a date once with Kate but it ended with a chaste kiss. Sure, she tried to get me to come upstairs for coffee but I wasn't interested. Jessica tries every day to get in my pants but I've never have and will never go there. She's not my type. You're my type." He leaned in and captured my lips, his arms encircling my waist and pulling me closer to him. I could feel him right where I needed him.

As our kiss became more intense my movements against him became quicker. I was suddenly aware of the baby bump that was making its presence known the closer I tried to get to him. Noticing my hesitation Edward pushed me down onto the bed.

"You are beautiful, Bella," he whispered, his hands gently caressing my sides. That was all the encouragement that I needed. I wrapped my arms around his neck pulling him down, slightly tugging the hair at the base. He groaned into my mouth, rubbing his groin faster into me.

His hands found their way underneath my sweatshirt, his touches light as he slowly moved to cup my breasts.

"Do you trust me?" He asked. I looked at him and could see his devotion.

"I do." I whispered. He pulled me up slightly so he could discard my sweatshirt and shirt to the floor. He pulled the cups of my bra down, releasing my puckered flesh.

He took one of my nipples in his mouth, scraping slightly with his teeth and swirling his tongue while his other hand plucked and twisted the other one. I arched my back into him, my body pleading with him for more. He took my bra off the rest of the way as he palmed me in his hands.

"You feel so good," he breathed. I groaned. This was slow torture. I needed to touch him, badly.

I pulled off his tie and began unbuttoning the rest of his shirt, peeling it back from his sculpted shoulders and chest. He helped me remove it fully, throwing it onto the floor with mine. It was nice to finally see him. I rubbed my hands up and down, loving the feeling of him above me.

"You're beautiful, too," I replied as my fingers moved down toward his happy trail. He leaned forward and kissed me passionately, his tongue caressing mine. I knew then that I couldn't take it slow anymore. I wanted him, now. We could do slow later.

I grabbed a hold of his belt, unbuckling it in record time. Noticing what I was doing, Edward did the same with my pants. Soon both our pants and underwear were off and we lay there completely naked.

"Bella, are you sure? We can wait, you know."

I shook my head. "I've waited long enough to feel you again." I answered. He nodded and with that he entered me slowly, my body stretching for the invasion of him. We groaned with pleasure when his hips finally met mine.

He started a slow rhythm at first, building up faster and faster as I met him thrust for thrust. One of my hands was on his shoulder for leverage as the other twisted my nipple.

"Oh, God, that's so fucking hot." He grunted as he watched me play with myself. He reached down to where we were connected and began to rub me. I moaned in ecstasy as my orgasm approached, taking me over suddenly, the intensity of it catching me off guard. I stilled as the euphoria of my pleasure grabbed hold of me and took me under. Edward drove into me a few more times before his orgasm captured him, too.

He stilled above me, both of us breathless. He leaned forward and captured my lips in a searing kiss that implied this was far from over. He rolled over as we both panted; a light sheen of sweat present on both our bodies. He pulled me into him, his chest to my back.

"That was amazing," he exclaimed, his hands finding their way to my stomach. Soon we fell asleep, wrapped in each other's arms. When we woke a few hours later we spent it making up for lost time.

It was now the beginning of August and I was very pregnant. I felt as big as a house. I sat on the couch with my feet propped up on the glass coffee table covered in pregnancy magazines and books, waiting for Edward to come back from getting Chinese food. I wouldn't be surprised if the baby came out wanting Kung Pao Chicken.

Just as I was about to get frustrated that Edward wasn't back yet, the door opened and in he walked with an arm full of bags. I flew off the couch to help but was shooed away immediately.

"I don't think so. Get back on the couch," he stated, pointing back to where I had been sitting. I sulked back over and sat down with a huff.

"Okay." I sighed. I had been put on bed rest a few days prior. Apparently, I was too stressed or something, but technically I was off of it now. However, Edward was taking the doctor's orders literally, unfortunately. "You know I'm not on bed rest any more," I pointed out putting my feet back onto the table scattering more magazines around as Edward made his way into the kitchen.

"Doesn't matter. As long as I'm taking care of you, you won't be doing any activities." At that I pouted. "Why sad?" he asked when he walked back in carrying plates of delicious food that made my stomach instantly start grumbling. I had forgotten how hungry I was.

"Nothing," I murmured taking a bite of food. How could I tell him that all I had been able to think about was sex? I'm like the horniest pregnant girl ever. At first I was getting it whenever I wanted much to the liking of Edward and it was wonderful, but now with the bed rest he won't touch me anymore.

_*Flashback*_

_As I waited for Edward, I got the brilliant idea to try on the lingerie Alice had bought for me. Once she'd met Edward, she immediately went out and bought me lingerie that actually made me feel sexy even with a bump. She explained to me that it was a much-needed investment and I would thank her later, whatever that meant. _

_Edward and I had been getting along fine in the sex department but I wanted to spice it up a bit. As I slipped into the see-through white nighty, I immediately felt sexier. Just as I was going to light candles, I heard the front door open. _

"_Edward?" I called, but there was no answer. "Edward?" I called again padding my way down the hall to the living room. Suddenly self conscious, I wrapped my arms around my chest, this lingerie left little to the imagination._

_I walked into the living room to find Edward seated on the couch, his head in his hands. He had been working on a stressful case lately and I could tell it was getting to him. _

"_Edward?" I whispered. He looked up at me, his eyes darkening instantly. He sat for a moment staring at me, but before I could ask him what was wrong he was by my side. _

"_Bella, you are absolutely breathtaking." He captured my lips and pulled me close. _

"_Let me make you feel better," I uttered pulling him back to the bedroom. For the rest of the night he didn't even think of work. _

_*End of flashback*_

"Penny for your thoughts," Edward whispered into my ear. I hadn't even noticed I had zoned out.

"Oh, uh, it's nothing," I insisted. I could tell from his look that he didn't believe me. "Okay. I was just thinking of that time I wore the white nighty for you. Do you remember?"

"How could I forget? That was an amazing night."

"Would you like to recreate it?" I asked giving him the best sexy smile I could muster.

"Bella, you know I would, but the doctor said no strenuous activities."

"Yeah, but that was until two days ago plus I'm already to thirty-seven weeks! That's considered full-term, you know." He pondered my statement a moment but I could tell I wasn't winning.

"You know once I have the baby it'll be at least six weeks before we can again." I placed my plate on the table and straddled him on the couch. He groaned.

"You're not giving up are you?" he inquired, rubbing my hips.

"Nope." I placed my hands on both sides of his face and kissed him sweetly. "Please."

"Okay, love." I hopped off of him excited that I finally got my way. As I was entering into the bathroom to freshen up a bit I felt water gush out of me. Thinking I had peed or something I bent down to check. That was a lot of water.

"Edward?"

"Yeah?" he asked from in the bedroom. I poked my head out the door and sighed at the sight of him half-naked on the bed.

"Can you come here for a moment?" He climbed off the bed and headed toward me.

"What's up, love? What's going on?" Just then I felt a slight pain in my lower abdomen, gripping my stomach, I reached out for Edward's hand.

"I think we're going to have to wait the six weeks because I think my water just broke."

**A/N Hides… Next chapter posting next! I promise! *runs to post***


	14. Chapter 14 These are the days

**A/N Here's 14! Enjoy! We are getting towards the end folks. There is one more chapter and an epilogue… then maybe a smutty outtake if anyone wants one!**

**Mucho gracious to my beta h00r coachlady12…She beat me with a baseball bat for this chapter… it was that bad! Lol. I love her though! Please go check out her stories on her ff site they are amazing! She has a finished one Dangerous Corporate Liaisons and a WIP Guarding Bella Swan. Both awesome so go now! 2113307/coachlady1**

**Also need to thank: 84Gemma, ducknynoel, and joayla for looking over this chappy for me! I love y'all so much! **

**Check out on my profile for song info and the lovely polyvore that 84Gemma did for the fic! **

**Also check out the banner that the talented rosalynn7885 made on the profile!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Not a single thing. All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of Stephenie Meyer. There is no copyright infringement intended.**

_Never before and never since, I promise  
will the whole world be warm as this  
and as you feel it, you'll know it's true  
that you are blessed and lucky  
it's true, that you are touched by something  
that will grow and bloom in you_

These are days you'll remember

_These are the days by Natalie Merchant_

BPOV

"Oh, my God! Are you sure?" Edward asked gripping my hand tighter.

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure. I just had a lot of water gush out of me and I'm getting pains." I grunted as another pain hit.

"Okay. Okay. Um, I'll get the bags and you get dressed." He ran into the walk-in closet and started looking around frantically.

"Edward! I haven't even packed my bags yet!"

"Oh, okay. Well, I'll pack and you get dressed." He started throwing random clothes into the closest suitcase. Normally, I would fight him on this and pack myself but at that moment I didn't care. He could pack whatever the hell he wanted. I pulled off my maternity jeans that were now soaked through and grabbed a pair of sweat pants. I was going into labor so I didn't care how I looked. As another pain hit, I grabbed the side of the door and breathed through it. I was trying to remember what was written in all of those magazines and books I had read. However, right now, my memory was fuzzy at best.

"You okay?" Edward asked coming up behind me, rubbing soothing circles in my back, his face full of worry. I nodded. We locked everything up and Edward helped me out to the car.

As we drove, Edward called my mom to let her know what was going on. I could hear her squealing through the phone and proclaiming she was on the next flight out. Then he called the hospital to let them know we were on our way and that my contractions were averaging every five to seven minutes apart.

I didn't pay much attention to the conversation after that as I gripped the door handle tightly. I closed my eyes and concentrated on breathing. I couldn't help thinking how painful it was already and this was only the beginning.

"Um, okay, so your doctor is not on call at the hospital tonight," Edward stated glancing at me quickly as he merged off the highway.

"What? Then who is?" I inquired looking over at him, my hands now on my stomach. It was so dark in the car and I could barely see the expression on his face.

"My dad," he replied putting the blinker on to turn into the hospital parking lot.

"Oh," I muttered as Edward parked. He hopped out and grabbed the bags from the backseat. He walked over to me in lightning speed and helped me out of the passenger side.

"How is this going to work?" I asked, completely confused and shocked at this new information. "Can he be my doctor?"

"Yes. It'll work just like it would if it was your own doctor; we don't really have a choice. He's the doctor on duty for delivery so he's the one we have to use." He held my hand as we walked across the parking lot toward the entrance.

"I'm not sure I'm comfortable with that, Edward. I don't really want him down there." I mumbled. I had met Esme and Carlisle officially a just a few weeks ago.

_*Flashback*_

"_Mom, Dad, this is Bella. Bella, this is my mom, Esme and you've already met my dad, Carlisle." _

"_It's such a pleasure to finally meet you, Bella! I've heard so much about you!" Esme enveloped me in a hug and I could tell her words were genuine. _

"_Bella, lovely to see you again," Dr. Cullen stated, shaking my hand. The last time we had seen each other was that day in the office; the memory caused me to blush. _

"_It's a pleasure to see you again, too, Dr. Cullen, and to meet you Mrs. Cullen." _

"_Oh, please call us Carlisle and Esme. Mrs. Cullen is my mother-in-law!" Esme exclaimed pulling me into the house. _

"_Now, let's talk about the baby before we eat dinner." _

_The conversation with Edward's parents was easy. They were nice and seemed truly interested in the baby. We talked about names and the nursery. I told them Edward and I had set up a nursery in his apartment because his apartment was bigger and he had the extra room. It made more sense. Seeing Edward paint the walls and help pick out the accessories had made me smile. _

_I purchased a bassinet for my apartment but Edward offered for me to stay at his place for as long as I wanted. We had been contemplating getting rid of my place altogether and have me move in, but hadn't made the final decision yet. _

_I told them about my mom. How happy see was to be a grandma and that she'd been around during the ultrasound but had since gone back home to be with her new husband, stating that now that Edward was present, she felt it was better to let us figure everything out. She was coming back for the birth, however, declaring she wouldn't miss it for the world. _

"_So, what about your father? Was he just as excited?" Esme inquired over our dinner of garlic roasted chicken and mashed potatoes. _

"_He's excited. He was shocked at first, but he's genuinely thrilled to be a grandfather." _

_The conversation continued from there. I learned a lot about Edward's childhood. I laughed at stories of his building forts and coloring on furniture. _

"_He's going to inherit this table." Esme laughed when she told me about the alphabet that was currently drawn underneath her thousand-dollar dining room table._

_I told them about my childhood and we discussed how Edward and I had met, skipping over the details. At the end of the night I felt welcomed and even loved by them. _

"_Please, let us know if there is anything we can do for you," Esme instructed as she and Carlisle walked us to the front door. _

"_Yes, anything at all," Carlisle replied. _

"_I will and thank you for a lovely evening." I hugged them both and headed toward the car. Edward stayed back a few moments to talk to them. I knew it was about something good though because when he turned to head back toward the car he was beaming. _

"_I think that went well. They really like you," Edward said as he slid into the driver's seat and started the car._

"_I think so, too, and I really liked them as well." Edward placed a soft kiss on my hand. We hadn't said we loved each other yet, but I knew it was coming and it made my heart soar with anticipation. As we drove back to his apartment, all I could think about was how happy I was that everything seemed to be working out. _

*_End of flashback*_

"It'll be okay, Bella. He's a professional," Edward explained as he ushered me into the lobby and toward the elevator that took us up to the delivery floor. As I exited the elevator, a nurse came over and talked briefly to Edward before coming over with a wheelchair for me. They wheeled me into a spacious room and explained to me all that I needed to do while Edward filled out paperwork.

Once I was settled into the bed and Edward had finished the paperwork, he was at my side holding my hand. I smiled up at him, loving how sweet he was being.

"You okay?" he asked.

"Yes." I nodded.

The nurse came in then to place a monitor on my stomach. I smiled as the entire room was suddenly filled with the wonderful sound of our baby's heartbeat.

"Bella, I need to check you to see how far you're dilated, okay?" The nurse explained.

"Okay."

"I need you to scoot your bottom down some and lean back." I scooted down a few inches feeling completely exposed. "That's good. Okay, you're going to feel some pressure." It was incredibly uncomfortable as she checked me. "Some pressure" was an understatement. I held my breath and grasped down harder on Edward's hand. He looked over at me worried.

"Okay, you're about four centimeters and eighty percent effaced. You are well on our way," she proclaimed. I relaxed, thankful that the invasion was over and not looking forward to any others. She checked the monitor as another contraction struck. Edward watched as the line on the screen went up and then went back down, signaling that my contraction was almost over. "Excellent. It seems that your contractions are averaging two to three minutes apart and are a good length. I'll go ahead and start an IV and let Dr. Cullen know. The baby will be here before you know it."

When she left the room, I breathed through another contraction. They seemed to be closer than two to three minutes apart. A little while later in the middle of yet another contraction, Dr. Cullen came in.

"Bella, it's so nice to see you again!" All I could do was grumble at his enthusiasm. I was not in the mood for his pleasantries. He chuckled. "Edward, son, good to see you." They exchanged handshakes. "Well, I see we are well on our way here. Everything's looking great. Were you having contractions throughout the day?" he asked as he walked over to check my monitor.

"I guess a few. I had some pains but it wasn't anything bad, just uncomfortable." Edward looked at me surprised to hear this news. All I could do was shrug.

"Did they feel like bad period cramps?"

"Yes," I replied as another contraction took over. Carlisle waited till it was over before continuing.

"Well, with everything on here and what you're telling me it shouldn't be long now. Did you want any pain medication?" he asked stopping next to my bed. I shook my head "no."

"I'm going to try and do this natural," I answered. Carlisle nodded.

"I'll be back in about an hour or two to check on you. Let me know if you change your mind and I'll order some medication." He gave me a quick smile and a pat on my shoulder and left. Edward leaned closer to me.

"Bella, you didn't tell me you had been having pains today," he stated obviously upset.

"Well, I've been having them off and on since before I went on bed rest. I didn't think it was a big deal." I huffed. I really didn't need his worry right now. I clamped down on his hand as a strong contraction washed over me.

"Oh, my God, please tell me when it's almost over!" I screamed. Maybe medication wasn't such a bad idea after all.

"Okay, almost there… almost there… you're over the worst part now… okay, it's over." He leaned forward and kissed my cheek.

"You'll have to continue to do that. It makes me feel better to know when it's almost over." He nodded. After an hour of contractions like that one, I decided on the epidural. I absolutely hated needles, especially one that was to go in my spine, but I needed relief from the pain and if this is the way to get it then I would do it. After it was done I immediately felt relief and Edward was back at my side.

An hour later the nurse came back to check me followed by Carlisle. I still wasn't okay with his being my doctor, but at this point I didn't care who it was. As long as they could deliver a baby I was good.

"Okay, it appears you're around eight centimeters and one-hundred percent effaced. Almost there, Bella!" she announced excitedly. All I could do was nod. I was feeling good from the drugs but could suddenly feel so much pressure.

"I'd better call your dad and let him know so he can come down. I told him I would." Edward squeezed my hand and kissed my temple then disappeared. I briefly remembered the day that Edward met my dad.

_*Flashback*_

_We pulled up to the house just as my dad exited with the trash. _

"_Dad!" I screeched running over to hug him. I would always be a daddy's girl. My dad wasn't a loving man, but I knew he loved me. He hugged me briefly before eyeing Edward who was paralyzed at the car. I walked him over. _

"_Dad, this is Edward. Edward, this is my dad, Charlie." _

"_Mr. Swan, it's nice to meet you." Edward held out his hand. My dad looked at it momentarily before reaching out and accepting his handshake. _

"_Nice to meet you, Edward. So you're the one who knocked up my daughter, huh?"_

_Edward swallowed. _

"_Dad!" I exclaimed bewildered that he'd be so bold. My dad just shrugged and walked back into the house after depositing the garbage in the can. At that moment Sue flew out of the house wrapping me in a hug. She had been like a second mother to me lately. _

"_Is he behaving?" she asked and I knew she was asking about my dad._

"_No, not really, but when does he ever?" She shook her head looking toward the house and sighed._

"_He means well. This is just hard for him. His baby girl is all grown up." I groaned. "Edward! Darling, it's so nice to meet you!" She walked over to him and wrapped her arms around him. If I had a camera I would have taken a picture of his surprised face._

"_We aren't always as stubborn as Bella's dad around here," she explained to him walking him toward the house. _

"_I heard that," my dad grumbled from his favorite chair. He was currently watching the Mariner's game and sipping on his favorite beer, Rainer. _

_The rest of the visit went as well as it could. My dad wasn't overly friendly toward Edward, but he wasn't rude either. When I was sixteen I asked him why he was mean to my boyfriend. He told me that he would never be nice to any of my boyfriends because he had a daughter and he knew what boys were thinking. At the time the statement confused me. _

_Right as we were leaving, Edward disappeared into the kitchen with my father. _

"_Should I be worried?" I questioned Sue as she walked with me outside. _

"_No, I told your father to be gentle with him." Moments later Edward came back out, his face completely white. He would never tell me what they discussed but later on that week Edward asked if my father really did own a shotgun. _

_*End of Flashback*_

Right when Edward left, Esme came into the room. She looked breathtaking in a crème colored knee-length dress, her hair pulled up and away from her face.

"Bella! I wanted to stop by and let you know that I'm here in the waiting room, love. I'm so excited!" She leaned in and kissed my forehead. She spoke softly with Carlisle before exiting. I groaned as I felt more pressure.

"Feeling some pressure?" Carlisle asked.

"Yes, it feels like I have to pee," I stated wondering if I really did.

"That's normal. You remember your classes?" I nodded. "It's all part of the process."

Edward came back then followed by the nurse. "Your dad and Sue are on their way."

"Okay," I replied trying really hard not to groan. It wasn't painful just uncomfortable.

"Bella, we're going to check you again, okay?" I squeezed my eyes shut and attempted to relax as they checked me, but failed miserably. The pressure was unbearable.

"Alright, you're fully dilated. With the next contraction I need you to push," Carlisle instructed. The monitor beeped signaling my next contraction. Edward reached over and grabbed my hand.

"Good. Take a deep breath, hold it, and push from your bottom," Carlisle said. I inhaled and pushed. "Yes, just like that. Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one, and breathe Bella." I let my breath and took another deep breath.

"Okay, with the next contraction same thing," Carlisle explained. The next time the machine beeped, I did it again, Carlisle counting to ten. I did this for an hour and every time he said I was getting closer and I started not to believe him.

"Okay, we can see the head," he announced. Suddenly, bright lights were turned on and what felt like a million people were in the room. Carlisle was now dressed in scrubs and a mask.

"This is it, Bella. I know you're tired, but just a few more pushes and you and Edward get to meet your baby and I get to meet my grandchild." I nodded and pressed down again. Edward was holding my hand, telling me how good I was doing.

"Son, would you like to see this?" Carlisle asked as I pushed again. Edward made his way toward my feet and watched with wide eyes.

"That's it, Bella. One more time and the head will be out." I mustered all of my strength and pushed, grunting my frustrations out.

"Okay, the head's out, you can stop pushing now." Easier said than done because at that moment all I wanted to do was push. There was a rush of activity as the baby's nose was suctioned out. Before I knew it our baby was out and crying in Carlisle's arms.

"It's a girl!" he announced placing her immediately on my stomach. His eyes were full of tears. I reached out to touch my daughter's tiny hand and began to cry. She was absolutely gorgeous.

"Edward, would you like to cut the cord?" Carlisle asked handing him the scissors. Edward nodded as tears rolled down his cheeks. Seeing him so emotional made me cry even more. Carlisle showed him where to cut. Afterward, they swept her away to be cleaned. Edward came over and kissed me sweetly.

"Thank you," he said cupping my face in his hands.

"For what?" I asked.

"For giving me the best gift ever."

The nurse walked back over with our daughter wrapped in a blanket, her cherub face sticking out from underneath her pink cap. She handed her to Edward who cradled her gently in his arms.

"Hi, Emma. It's so nice to finally meet you. We've been waiting so long to see you," he told her. I wiped a tear away at the conversation he was having with her. He walked her over. I scooted over to make room for him to sit on the bed with her.

"We love you," he proclaimed, kissing her chubby, rosy cheek. He looked over at me, his watery green eyes full of wonder and joy.

"And I love you," he stated leaning in and kissing me. Emma gurgled at the exact moment our lips met and I couldn't help but smile against him. We were now a family.

**A/N *whew* Leave me some review love! xxo**


	15. Chapter 15 The first day of my life

***Peeks in* Hi all…:/ I'm so sorry for the delay… I think I got burnt out from writing so many o/s's although that's really no excuse. I finally got my mojo back though! **

**I have this chapter and the next one to post and then the epilogue. It was only going to be one chapter, but I split it because it was long as one. I hope you enjoy! **

**Thank you to my lovely beta coachlady12! Please go check out her stories on her ff site they are amazing! She has a finished one Dangerous Corporate Liaisons and a WIP Guarding Bella Swan. Both awesome so go now! 2113307/coachlady1**

**Also need to thank: 84Gemma and ducknynoel for prereading this for me! I love y'all so much! **

**Check out on my profile for song info and the lovely polyvore that 84Gemma did for the fic! **

**Also check out the banner that the talented rosalynn7885 made on the profile!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Not a single thing. All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of Stephenie Meyer. There is no copyright infringement intended.**

"_Yours is the first face that I saw  
I Think I was blind before I met you  
I don't know where I am  
I don't know where I've been  
But I know where I want to go  
So I thought I'd let you know  
That these things take forever  
I especially am slow  
But I realized that I need you  
And I wondered if I could come home"_

_The first day of my life by Bright Eyes_

BPOV

Emma Marie Cullen was born August 8th at 5:43pm. She weighed seven pounds, five ounces and had a dusting of auburn hair atop her head. I would bet money that she would have father's dark green eyes also.

When she was born and laid on my stomach my heart doubled in size. I instantly loved her more than I thought possible to love someone. Then I saw Edward with her and my heart swelled even more.

Edward was an instant pro with her, swaddling her perfectly and burping her without struggle after her feedings. I envied his naturalness with her.

The first day after she was born I slept on and off between feedings and my blood pressure checks. Esme was in the room moments after Emma was born, gushing over her and proclaiming her the cutest baby in the world.

"Oh my goodness, look at her face! She looks just like Edward when he was born! She is absolutely the cutest baby ever," she exclaimed when Edward handed Emma over.

My dad and Sue came to visit shortly after, agreeing with Esme's assessment.

"She does look a lot like Edward especially with that hair; however, I think she'll have brown eyes like her mother," my dad murmured cradling her against his chest. Edward nodded, pride evident on his face.

Rose, Emmett, Alice and Jasper arrived that night to offer their congratulations.

"She's absolutely beautiful just like I knew she would be," Rose declared stroking Emma's hand as she held her.

"You've held her too long," Alice announced reaching out to grab Emma. "It's my turn. I am, after all, her favorite aunt."

Rose gaffed. "You're delusional."

"Well, I knew she was a girl all along. Didn't you say she was going to be a boy?" She questioned bouncing Emma slighting on her shoulder.

"Whatever, Alice," Rose replied rolling her eyes.

"She's gorgeous, man. Congrats," Jasper proclaimed patting Edward on the back.

"So, do I get to hold my namesake yet?" Emmett whined from behind Alice. "You might have known she was a girl all along but I helped her get her," Emmett announced holding his hands out for her.

"Can't argue with the man," I said laughing as Alice huffed but handed Emma over.

My mom showed up the next morning with her husband Phil in tow. He was carrying pink balloons and a bouquet of pink flowers. Mom was beaming from ear to ear as she pulled Emma away from Edward.

"I'm a grandmother! Look at my beautiful granddaughter!" she announced as she held Emma up, cradling her head in her hand. Between my mom, Edward, and Esme, I knew that Emma was going to be spoiled rotten.

I spent the next two days in the hospital learning good positions to feed and learning the best way to change a diaper without getting peed or pooped on. My mother helped me by teaching me some tricks she remembered from when I was a baby. I thanked my lucky stars to have her help and her insight.

Edward would take Emma every chance he got, even cradling her while she slept.

"You're going to spoil her, Cullen," I stated as he rocked her gently.

"I could never spoil her enough. She's my princess," he responded stroking her cheek, focusing on her small face. My heart melted at the fact that she already had him wrapped around her little finger.

Before long we headed back to Edward's apartment and tried to settle into a routine. My mom stayed for the first week to help out, but headed back to Florida because of work. Before she left she planned her next visit and made me promise to call her every day so she could check in on us. She even mentioned setting up a web cam at some point which Edward agreed to wholeheartedly.

Edward took the two weeks after my mom left off from work. I loved having him around. He was amazing with Emma and the extra sleep that it gave me didn't hurt. Unfortunately, he couldn't take any more time off because his cases were stacking up. Anymore time away would just mean longer hours later in the office.

I was off for maternity leave for twelve weeks and was contemplating how I could go back. I loved my job, but I wanted to be with Emma as much as I could. Luckily, I had a boss that understood my problem. Angela worked from home the first few months after Ben, Jr. was born and I took a lot of the workload at the office. Now that I was the one home with a baby, I could work from home as she held down the office. Luckily for both of us, our office was family friendly and didn't mind when Angela did come in with Ben, Jr. and a Pack 'N Play in tow.

The first day that I was alone with Emma I was scared. I wondered if I could do it all by myself. I'd had so much help over the last few weeks that I wasn't sure. Eventually, I found my way and we fell into an easy routine. Edward would come home every night and give her baths and hold her until she slept. Then he would spend the rest of the night holding and kissing me until we both fell asleep.

I got the all-clear sign from my doctor when Emma was about eight weeks old and I couldn't wait to get home and show Edward just how excited I was. When I arrived home, Edward and Emma were passed out on the couch, Emma resting peacefully on his chest. I didn't have the heart to wake either of them so I left them to sleep and headed to the office to work some.

An hour later I heard Emma begin to whimper and Edward whispering softly to her. I padded down the hallway and watched as Edward walked into the kitchen to retrieve a bottle of breast milk from the fridge and prepare it.

"Hey, pretty girl," he cooed. "Are we hungry?" He nestled her onto his shoulder rocking her slightly back and forth as he filled the bottle warmer with water. "We're waiting on Mommy to get back from the doctor or you could have this milk right from the source," he stated matter-of-factly, placing a kiss on her forehead. I stifled a giggle at his explanation of the bottle to her.

"Yep, Mommy should be home soon and then I'll get to spend some time with the two most beautiful girls in the world," he explained placing the bottle in the warmer as the steam began to rise.

I could only gape at his words. Throughout the weeks Edward had been so caring, taking time out to give me foot rubs and drawing me baths, taking Emma any chance he got so I could rest. I could tell he was really trying to show how much he cared about me through not only his words but his actions. We hadn't been able to do much intimately since Emma was born but every spare moment he had he spent making it special.

I knew in that moment that I wanted more with Edward. I wasn't sure exactly what "more" was but I knew I wanted it. I tiptoed back toward our bedroom as Edward made his way to the living room, feeding Emma as he went. I sat on the bed to gather my thoughts. I loved Edward. I did. We had grown extremely close over the last few months and even though Emma was what had ultimately brought us together, I knew that she wasn't the only reason. As I sat there and mulled over the last few weeks and my feelings, I didn't notice when Edward entered.

"Hey, when'd you get home?" he questioned walking over to me and kissing me softly on the lips. Home. Yes, that was exactly what this was. I smiled brightly at him.

"About an hour ago, you and the princess here were sleeping peacefully and I didn't want to disturb you." I reached over and pulled Emma into my arms rocking her gently. She was now full from her bottle and dozing off.

"How was the doctor?" he whispered sitting down next to me on the bed, rubbing my back.

"Good, really good. Actually, I got the green light," I whispered back leaning closer to him. His eyes grew wide as he took in my words.

"Really?" he inquired scooting over the short distance between us and kissing me sweetly again. All I could do was nod. He reached over and took Emma, walking her out of the room to her room next door even though she'd never actually slept in there before. He came back seconds later with the baby monitor, shutting the door behind him.

"You don't know how happy I am to hear those words," he stated sitting back down next to me on the bed.

"You don't know how happy I am to say those words," I answered back circling my arms around his neck, leaning in to capture his lips. The kiss was slow and sensual but I wanted, needed, more. I stood up and swung my legs over his hips, straddling him and feeling his erection grow against me. I moaned as he rocked me back gently, allowing me to feel just how much he wanted me.

I reached down and grabbed his shirt pulling it up and over his head. He leaned forward and did the same to mine.

"Baby, I'm not sure how long I'm going to last. It's been a while." I smiled at his honesty. It _had_ been a while, too long.

"That's okay; you'll just have to make it up to me over and over again." This time he smiled and pulled me hard against his chest, lifting me up, turning me over, and placing me on the bed.

"Oh, I intend to do just that." He shed the rest of his clothes along with mine and before I knew it we were naked and kissing passionately. My arms were looped around his neck pulling him down further, his hands grasping my sides so tightly I wouldn't have been surprised if there would be a bruises later, but I didn't care. I needed more.

I moaned when I felt the head of his cock brush against my clit. It had been too long since I'd felt him. I kissed him as he entered me, stretching and making me whole. It hurt some after the baby but it was better than I expected.

"You okay?" he inquired stilling momentarily.

"Never better," I replied grabbing his hips and pushing him forward. He pushed into me again and again. It was amazing how wet I was just for him. It wasn't long before I was spilling over the edge, grasping onto his shoulders and screaming his name. He pounded into me a few more times then I felt him shudder above me, spilling his seed inside me, and whispering my name over and over again.

"I'm sorry," he murmured pressing his forehead against mine.

"Why?" I asked stroking his back soothingly.

"For not lasting," he said looking down and sighing.

"It's okay and like I said you can make it up to me." And with that we turned over and started again, this time with me on top.

Emma was now four months old and cuter than ever, smiling and giggling and attempting to roll over. I wasn't sure what I would do once she learned to move. I loved the fact that I could leave her to play on her mat and come back to find her in the same location.

Edward still maintained a regular work shift as much as he could. He only had to do a long day around a trial and that was few and far between. He did spend a lot of time working from home. I went into the office two or three times a week but Emma usually came along. Everyone in the office adored her except Jessica. Every time we entered she would just roll her eyes and pretend to be doing something. I was seriously thinking of ways to replace her although I knew legally I couldn't.

It was a Wednesday night when Edward got home late.

"Hi, honey," I said when I heard the door open and shut.

"Hi," he replied. His hands were in his hair and I knew immediately something was up.

"What's wrong?" I asked waiting for him to answer.

"Nothing," he stated. "I'm going to be in the office if you need me."

His attitude and late nights lasted just over another week before I was tired of dealing with it.

"Edward, what the fuck?" I bellowed entering his office on a Friday night when he was being exceptionally rude and short.

"What?" he answered looking over at me from behind his desk.

"Seriously, you're asking me 'what?' You've been in a sour mood and haven't talked to me in a week. Every night you come home late and then tell me you'll be in your office. And anytime I speak to you, you're short and rude. You haven't touched me at all. Are you sleeping with someone?" With that he groaned. "What? Are you?" I asked again.

"No, Bella. I'm not sleeping with anyone." He sighed standing up from his chair.

"Then what is it? Because you're seriously driving me crazy here," I commented looking anywhere but at him.

"I have to go back to Chicago," he mumbled.

"What?" I asked not believing his words.

"I have to go back to Chicago," he answered louder this time.

"Oh," I said not even sure how to respond. "For how long?"

"I don't know. I've been trying to get out of it, but it looks like I'll have to go." He looked at me, sadness in his eyes.

"How long?" I inquired again. I could tell he didn't want to tell me.

"Maybe a month?" he answered. "Maybe two, I'm not really sure." With his words I stopped. A month? Really? I wasn't sure if I could really do a month. It didn't seem like that long, really, but I hadn't gone a day without seeing him and I knew with Emma it would be hard without him. "I'm sorry but there doesn't seem to be anything I can do to get out of it." He exhaled grabbing his head in his hands.

How did I not know about this? I mean lots of things come through human resources to get approved; how did I not see this? Angela. It was the only explanation. They were probably trying to find ways to get out of sending him and leaving me out of the loop. I sighed. I sat down on the leather couch trying to come up with a solution. Then the simplest answer came to me.

"Well, why don't we come with you?" I responded looking over at him to see his reaction. His head lifted slowly as he took me in.

"Really? You'd consider coming with me?" he asked shocked.

"Of course. I have some time saved up, plus, I'm sure if I can work from home I can work from Chicago. And I'm sure Angela would approve," I declared feeling more confident in my assessment.

"You're sure?" he asked coming toward me and pulling me closer to him.

"Yes, more than sure," I whispered before leaning in and kissing him. "I would go with you anywhere."

It was a little over a week later and I was boarding a plane to Chicago by myself with a five month old. Edward had had to head out before I could get everything in order.

Angela had been really supportive of my decision to go with Edward. She actually agreed that maybe have an HR representative in the new firm location would help and arranged for me to have some meetings while I was there.

Emma was great on the plane ride, only whimpering once in awhile. I kept a constant bottle ready to help her with her ears and she enjoyed it when the flight attendant came around wanting to hold her.

As soon as we exited into baggage, Edward was there hugging and kissing me and taking Emma from my arms.

"Hey, pretty girl, how was your flight," he cooed holding Emma up as she smiled brightly down at him.

"Flight was good. Thanks for asking," I giggled. He smiled over at me kissing me again.

"It was good then?" I nodded so happy to be back by his side. "Let's grab your luggage then, the car is waiting."

Our luggage was already circling around the belt, thankfully, and I was happy to see that the car seat had made it as well.

After installing the seat we were on our way to the hotel.

"It's a really nice place. I've stayed here many times before. This is actually where I was the last time I was here. I got us a suite, too, so we have kitchen and a living room. I also set up the Pack 'N Play in the corner of our room for Emma to sleep in but I requested a second one for the living room just in case." I reached out and grabbed his hand as the driver maneuvered through traffic.

"You thought of everything." I smiled up at him.

"Nothing is too good for my girls." He leaned over and kissed me sweetly. Just as our kiss began to intensify the car came to stop and the driver announced that we were here at the Fairmont.

The driver began to unload all of our stuff as we exited the car with promises to have the bellhop bring everything up as soon as possible. Edward grabbed Emma in one arm and my hand and led us to the elevators. We settled into our room and made it as much of a home as possible. The cribs were set up, the toys were laid out, and our luggage was unpacked.

A few days after we'd arrived we decided to go grocery shopping so we'd be all set up for the week to come. Shopping with Edward was a hard task. He was just like a kid grabbing anything and everything without rhyme or reason and throwing it into the cart.

"You can't just grab whatever you want, Edward. That's why we have a list." I giggled at his recent cereal choices.

"Why not? I like both these types of cereals." He shrugged. I giggled again.

"Well, you're paying, so be my guest, but when I pay we're sticking to the list." He rolled his eyes but smiled at me as we continued down the aisle toward the Pop-Tarts. We finally finished an hour later and headed back to the hotel. The back of the car was completely full of groceries and I wasn't sure exactly where it would all go. As usual, the driver agreed to have a bellhop bring our groceries up as soon as possible. I was thankful that I didn't have to worry about carrying all of it upstairs.

As we reached the elevators and the doors opened, I began to enter but Edward was suddenly motionless.

"Edward?" I asked looking over at him as he stood there as if he'd seen a ghost.

"Irina?" he inquired. I looked into the awaiting elevator and noticed a blond woman with a huge rack standing there staring back at Edward. My eyes grew wide at the sight. Who the fuck was Irina?

**E/N huh oh… who thought that Irina would be back in the picture? Leave a review! Posting the next chapter soooooooooon! Promise!**


	16. Chapter 16 Shameless

**A/N Here is the last chapter before the epilogue! I can't believe it's almost over! *tear* **

**Thank you to my beta h00r coachlady12! I love her lots! J/S. Please go check out her stories on her ff site they are amazing! She has a finished one Dangerous Corporate Liaisons and a WIP Guarding Bella Swan. Both awesome so go now! 2113307/coachlady1**

**Also need to thank: 84Gemma and ducknynoel for prereading this for me! I love y'all so much! **

**Check out on my profile for song info and the lovely polyvore that 84Gemma did for the fic! **

**Also check out the banner that the talented rosalynn7885 made on the profile!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Not a single thing. All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of Stephenie Meyer. There is no copyright infringement intended.**

"_I cannot name this  
I cannot explain this  
and I really don't want to  
just call me shameless  
I can't even slow this down  
let alone stop this  
and I keep looking around  
but I cannot top this."_

_Shameless by Ani DiFranco_

"Hi," Irina mumbled.

"Hi," Edward replied. Was I missing something here? "How have you been?" he asked.

"Good, I've been good. Things are looking up since I saw you last." She looked over at me and smiled then looked down at Emma, her smile growing bigger. "I see you've been busy," she declared pointing at Emma. I grasped Edward's hand tighter which broke whatever spell he was under. He cleared his throat.

"Yes, yes, I have been. This is Bella. My Bella and this is our daughter, Emma." He pointed at the car seat. My Bella? Was he serious right now? I looked at him narrowing my eyes. I could see him gulp. He knew he was in trouble.

"Well, I'm so glad everything worked out with you guys. I knew it would. It was so nice to see you again and to meet you. Take care." She looked at me and smiled as she exited the elevator. I let go of Edward's hand and grabbed Emma's car seat from him.

"Bella," he whispered but I ignored him. I pressed the button for our floor and waited impatiently to reach it. "Bella," he said again a little louder this time. I huffed, ignoring his pleading eyes. The doors opened and I jetted out without stopping, trying to get away from him as fast as possible. I needed to clear my head and I couldn't do it with him around.

"Bella, wait please. It's not what you think!" he exclaimed racing after me down the hall. I twirled around to face him.

"What is it then? Do I dare ask who that is?" I screamed suddenly aware we were still in the hallway. Edward opened the door and ushered me in. "Who is she?" I asked as soon as the door shut.

"No one," he replied running his hands through his hair. This was a sure sign that he was nervous.

"No one? She didn't seem like no one to me," I responded stepping farther away from him unable to look at him.

"Bella, I met her in the bar the last time I was here and she followed me to the elevator. Nothing happened. She tried but I stopped her. That's all." He sat down on the couch, his head in hands.

"She tried? What do you mean she tried?" He looked up at me with sad eyes.

"She tried to give me a blowjob in the elevator but I stopped her. All I could think about was how wrong it was and how much I wanted you."

"Wait, you stopped her? Exactly how far did she get?" I asked but he didn't answer. The longer he was quiet the more I began to panic. "How far, Edward?" I asked again.

"She had my dick in her mouth and started but I stopped her shortly after," he admitted, his hands back in his hair.

I felt like the wind was knocked out of me. I was wallowing in Seattle carrying his child and he was getting head from a total stranger in an elevator? I could feel the tears begin to well up. I knew this was too good to be true. I knew it all along. I placed Emma down and took her out of her car seat. I fished around in her bag for her bottle and headed to the bedroom. Edward stood up and started to follow.

"Bella, please. It meant nothing. I stopped her. All I could think about was you, I swear." I held up my hand and finally looked at him. I could see the tears in his eyes as he stared at me, pleading with me to believe him. Part of my heart broke at the sight. He looked so sad and terrified. "Please," he begged reaching out for me, but I backed away. His eyes dropped and I could see a tear roll down his cheek.

"Edward, I need some time. Please, just give me that," I whispered as my tears began to fall. He just nodded as I entered the bedroom and shut the door behind me. I spent the rest of the day into the evening in bed. Edward came in and out to help take care of Emma, never once addressing me or the elephant in the room. At some point he came in and took Emma to give her a bath. I could hear him singing to her in the en suite bathroom and my heart broke more at his loving words to her.

I could tell Edward was genuinely sorry and I believed him when he told me that he'd stopped Irina. He really didn't have to tell me anything happened at all. I pondered over the events that occurred in the elevator. The way the lady looked me and Emma. Her words replayed in my head, _"Well, I'm so glad everything worked out with you guys. I knew it would."_ I could tell that she was happy to see me, and it was obvious later on he must have talked about me to her for her to mention knowing that it would work out between us.

Then I thought over the past few months I'd spent with him and all the loving things he'd done, the way he held me at night or got me my favorite lunch when he knew I was having a bad day. Or the way he made me coffee every morning just the way I liked it or complimented me any time he could.

Then there was how he was with Emma, taking every spare moment to spend with her, holding her, caring for her, even getting up with her in the middle of the night when he had to get up for work the next day just so I could sleep.

I knew that this was just a bump in the road and although I was upset that he hadn't told me about this incident, I knew he didn't mean anything bad by it. We weren't together then and he could have rightfully been with someone, but he stopped it and that should count.

I got up out of the bed and headed toward the living room. Entering, I saw Edward passed out on the couch, Emma was sleeping away in her crib next to him. I smiled at the sight. I walked over and sat down next to him. He woke up rubbing the sleep from his eyes and looking at me confused.

"Hey," I whispered.

"Hi," he replied. There was silence between us as he looked at me. I wondered where we'd go from here. He reached out and grabbed my hand in his and this time I didn't pull away. "I'm sorry," he stated linking our fingers together.

"I'm sorry, too," I answered. He looked at me confused, again not knowing why I was suddenly apologizing. "I should have believed you and not gotten so upset. She just took me by surprise, that's all. You said nothing had happened between you and anyone while we were apart so hearing that she knew you in any way shocked me."

"I know. I'm sorry. I honestly forgot completely about it. I was drunk. I know that's no excuse, but it didn't even register to me to tell you about it," he admitted bringing our linked hands to his chest.

"It's okay. We weren't together then and although I'm not happy that she had your dick in her mouth, at least you stopped it and it didn't go any farther. Plus, you've proven to me time and time again how much you care for me and for Emma, and I'm so sorry that I doubted you even for a second." I sighed lying down with him.

"I love you more than words," he whispered encircling his arms tightly around me.

"I know." I turned around and kissed him. We spent the rest of the night kissing and holding each other and I knew it was exactly where I wanted to be.

The next few weeks flew by. I did some assignments for Angela while Edward did the final proceedings on his case. Emma grew more minute by minute and it was hard to believe that she was almost seven months old.

The night that Edward's case was finally completed was a night to we decided to celebrate. We were finally going to go home and the realization was exciting.

Esme had come into town for the weekend because apparently she couldn't be without Emma for too long. So with Grandma in town and a free night, we took the opportunity to go out on the town and see finally the sites of the city.

I dressed for the night in my favorite blue dress. It was a silky, shiny material that came down to my knees. I combined it with Edward's favorite pair of black pumps and a black cardigan. Although it was May it was still relatively cold at night in Chicago.

I stepped out of the bedroom to find Edward waiting for me in a suit and tie, but not just any suit and tie, my favorites. It was charcoal gray and he wore a white dress shirt and skinny black tie. I would always comment that he looked like a GQ model when he wore it. It turned me on.

"Hi, beautiful," he said as I approached him. "God, I love this dress and those shoes," he trailed off looking me up and down.

"Hi, yourself; you look so handsome," I replied stopping in front of him. He reached out and grabbed my hand kissing it sweetly.

"Shall we go?" he inquired.

"Yes, please," I answered.

"Mom, we're about to go," Edward bellowed.

Esme appeared out of the bedroom carrying Emma on her shoulder.

"Jesus, Edward, could you try to be quiet? My granddaughter is trying to sleep," she scoffed.

"Sorry, Mom, but I wanted to let you know we're leaving."

"Okay, kids. Have fun." She kissed my cheek and Edward's before shooing us out the door so she could spend quality time with Emma.

"Where are we going?" I asked as we got into the awaiting car.

"It's a surprise," he responded climbing in beside me. We drove along the streets of Chicago and I couldn't get enough of how beautiful all the sites were. I couldn't wait to get out and actually see them. We drove a few moments longer and before I knew it we were pulling up to a familiar restaurant.

"Les Nomades?" I asked astonished.

"Yep," he said taking my hand in his and leading me out onto the sidewalk.

"I've been wanting to eat here for so long," I stated breathless that he remembered.

"I know." He kissed me before escorting me into the restaurant to be seated. As we sat down for dinner, I looked over at Edward and grinned. He was smiling at me, grabbing my hand rubbing soothing circles on my knuckles. His eyes were shining. The last time I'd seen him this happy was the day that Emma was born.

"You're beautiful. I love you," he commented after our server came and took our order.

"I love you too, so much," I emphasized squeezing his hand tighter. We enjoyed our dinner and ordered dessert. I wasn't sure where I would fit all this food but I was going to try. The meal was absolutely exquisite.

"Bella," he whispered as I was finishing off the rest of my wine.

"Mmmm?" I mumbled looking over at him. He smiled broadly and before I knew it I saw him on the floor on one knee. I gasped.

"I was going to wait till the perfect moment tonight to do this, but with you every moment is absolutely perfect because you are perfect for me. I love you so much that it hurts, and it would make me the happiest man in the entire world if you would agree to be my wife." I stared at him through teary eyes. I couldn't believe that he was proposing. I knew it would come at some point. We had even talked about marriage a few times, but I was shocked that it was now, his words causing an emotional floodgate to open inside me.

"Yes, yes, a thousand times yes," I exclaimed jumping up and into his arms. The whole restaurant erupted into a round of applause at my answer. He picked me up and twirled me around. The moment was so surreal that I almost wanted to pinch myself to make sure that it wasn't a dream.

"Thank you for making me the happiest man in the world," he whispered putting me down and leaning in to kiss me. I pulled back to look him directly in the eyes.

"No, thank _you_ for making me the happiest woman in the world. I love you, Edward Cullen."

"And I you the future Mrs. Cullen," he kissed me again grasping my hips and pulling me closer.

"Say it again," I pleaded.

"Mrs. Cullen?" he inquired, the smirk growing on his face.

"Yes," I restated encircling my hands around his neck. "I love the way that sounds."

"Me, too. You have no idea." He kissed me once more, this time more passionately, bringing my hips against his ever-present erection. I moaned at the contact. I would have done anything at that moment to take him right there in the restaurant. We were being completely inappropriate in front of all these people and I didn't care. It's just how we were and, hopefully, how we'd always be, carefree. A few minutes later Edward pulled away. I groaned at the loss of contact but smiled when he threw some hundreds on the table and reached for my hand.

"Come on, love. Let's go see the sites," he suggested winking at me.

"And you know we have all night to do that," I replied grabbing his hand in mine. As we walked out of the restaurant hand in hand, our desserts long forgotten, I knew in that moment that no matter where we were going, I would follow him anywhere. My heart soared at the thought of being able to love this man shamelessly for the rest of our lives.

**E/N Was it good, bad, indifferent? Is this how you thought Edward would propose? Honestly it wasn't what I thought originally, but it kind of wrote itself! Crazyness. Leave me a review. Going to work on the epilogue and smutty outtake! Let me know if there is anything you are wanting to know!**


	17. Chapter 17 Epilogue At last

**A/N Here is the Epilogue! I can't believe it! *sob* **

**Thank you to my beta h00r coachlady12! I love her lots! J/S. Please go check out her stories on her ff site they are amazing! She has a finished one Dangerous Corporate Liaisons and a WIP Guarding Bella Swan. Both awesome so go now! 2113307/coachlady1**

**All grammar mistakes are my own. I tinkered with this...0_o**

**Also need to thank: 84Gemma and ducknynoel for prereading this for me! I love y'all so much! **

**Check out on my profile for song info and the lovely polyvore that 84Gemma did for the fic! **

**Also check out the banner that the talented rosalynn7885 made on the profile!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Not a single thing. All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of Stephenie Meyer. There is no copyright infringement intended.**

_At last, my love has come along  
My lonely days are over  
And life is like a song  
Oh, yeah, at last  
The skies above are blue  
My heart was wrapped up in clovers  
The night I looked at you  
I found a dream that I could speak to  
A dream that I can call my own  
I found a thrill to rest my cheek to  
A thrill that I have never known  
Oh, yeah when you smile, you smile  
Oh, and then the spell was cast  
And here we are in heaven  
For you are mine  
At last_

"_At Last" by Etta James_

*2 years later*

"You look absolutely gorgeous," my mom declared pulling my veil up and over my head. I looked over at Alice and Rose to see they were both nodding in agreement, wiping tears from their eyes.

"Beautiful," Alice remarked walking toward me, tissue in hand. She fluffed my dress behind me as she spun me around to face the mirror. I couldn't believe who was staring back; the woman _was_ stunning and I couldn't believe it was me. My hair was golden brown with hints of red throughout. It was curled and pinned up just enough to show off my mother-in-law's pearl earrings—my something borrowed. There was a delicate tiara resting on the top of my head that, when it caught the light, sparkled—my something new. My dress was the first one I tried on. It was crisp white A-line design with capped sleeves and intricate beading woven throughout the top then down the left side. Stunning was an understatement.

I stood there staring in the mirror for a few moments wondering how in the world they had managed this makeover when a small voice broke me from my gaze.

"Momma!" Emma squealed running over to me, my father trailing fast behind her.

"Sorry, Bells. I tried to keep her away but she was very determined to see you," my father stated out of breath.

"It's okay, Dad. I know how she is." I leaned forward and gave my girl a quick hug. "Hey, my sweet girl! Have you been good for Poppa?" She nodded staring at me with her big, brown eyes. Her curly, auburn hair, which had been perfectly pinned away from her face an hour ago, was now half hanging down. I smiled; I could tell she had given her poppa a work out.

"She saw her daddy and just had to come find Momma." My dad snickered looking down and smiling at my almost three year old. She had him completely wrapped around her finger.

"So he's here?" I asked. I knew he would be, but that didn't mean that I wasn't relieved all the same.

"Yes, he's here Bella. You knew he would be," Rose replied smiling broadly at me, her left hand glittering with her diamond wedding band. Rose and Emmett had decided to elope last year in a simple Vegas wedding. It was short and sweet and very Rose and Emmett.

"How does he look?" I gulped. I've seen Edward in plenty of suits but never a tux. My imagination was going wild.

"Handsome as ever," my mother declared and I giggled. My mother thought the world of Edward. If she wasn't already married I would have been worried.

"We almost ready to go, Bells?" my dad asked extending his elbow out to me.

"Most definitely." I grinned taking his arm. I was more than ready.

After Edward had proposed in Chicago and we spent the rest of the night celebrating, we'd agreed on a long engagement. We still had a few things to figure out when we got back to Seattle, like living arrangements, and we weren't in any rush. We wanted to enjoy being engaged for awhile.

However, once the news was out that we were engaged, plans began anyway. My future mother-in-law talked nonstop about wedding places and florists she knew that did amazing bouquets. Alice was just as ecstatic if not more so, dragging me to bridal shop after bridal shop to try on dresses. I ended up buying the first one I had tried on even though Alice made me try on hundreds more.

When Edward and I stuck to our guns for a long engagement and didn't entertain their numerous requests to see venues or look into caterers, Alice and Esme joined forces. I was glad they had each other because between the two of them I swear my head would have exploded. I showed up when I absolutely had to, and although they did most of the research, the final decision was still made by Edward and me.

Phil came in at that moment stating that it was time to escort my mom and Emma down the aisle.

"You look gorgeous, Bella," he said then nodded his head toward my father.

"Thank you, Phil."

"Before you go, sweetheart, I want you to have this." Mom handed me a handkerchief. "This was Grandma Marie's handkerchief at her wedding, and the one I used in mine. I know that she would have loved for you to have it today." She placed the handkerchief in my hand as tears began to form.

"Thank you, Mom," I whispered trying not to cry. I missed my Nana more in that moment than I had in the last few years since she'd passed.

"I know Nana would have loved to be here to see you in your beautiful white dress," my mom said, "but you know she's here in spirit and in our hearts." She kissed me on my cheek before wiping her own tears away. "I love you, sweetie."

"I love you too, Mom." With that my mom picked Emma up who was now carrying a basket full of rose petals.

"Give kisses to Momma," she declared. Emma leaned forward and gave me slobbery kisses.

"I love kisses from my baby," I replied, tickling Emma's side as she giggled. "You are the prettiest flower girl ever."

"Pretty!" Emma shouted. My mom smiled broadly and turned to take Phil's arm so he could take them down the aisle. Edward and I agreed that Emma would sit with my mother during the service but that she could throw out flowers.

"Okay, everything's going smoothly, Bella," Alice announced fixing her purple, strapless dress before coming over and fluffing my dress one last time.

"Thank you for everything, Alice."

"Of course, Bella." She hugged me tightly. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

"Now, don't forget what I told you," she started.

"I know, I know, Alice. Left together, right together. Got it."

Rose came over and gave me a quick hug before heading toward the door mouthing that she loved me right before she disappeared down the aisle. Alice went shortly after giving me a wink.

"You ready, Bells?"

"I am."

As I walked down the aisle, all I could see was Edward. He was standing at the front of the church, his eyes wide and teary as he stared at me. My heart was pounding in my chest as my own tears threatened.

When we reached the front of the church and my father placed my hand in Edward's, it took all of my strength not to pull him forward.

"You look stunning," he whispered gripping my hand tightly in his.

"So do you," I whispered back smiling up at him.

The ceremony was short and sweet. We exchanged vows, we exchanged rings, and before I knew it, the minister declared us husband and wife. Edward lifted my veil over my head and leaned in to capture my lips in a searing kiss. As we broke away, our family and friends erupted in a round of applause.

"I love you, Mrs. Cullen."

"And I love you, Mr. Cullen."

After our introductions and our dance I finally got to look around. The reception was absolutely gorgeous. We were in a small courtyard in the back of the church, purple and white flowers were cascading down every service and the air was fragrant with roses and gardenias. Candlelight lit up the area, casting shadows against the sheer white fabric surrounding the tables. It was small and intimate; it was my dream wedding come true.

When I looked around the room as we sat down at our table, I couldn't help but smile at the sight. All the people I loved and adored were here to celebrate with us. I was so lucky to have all of them all in my life.

My dad was dancing with Sue, both smiling broadly at each other as my dad pulled her closer. My mom was still holding onto Emma as Phil danced with them both. Emma was squealing with delight as he spun them in circles. Rose was snuggling up close to Emmett. They were still very much in the honeymoon phase. Alice and Jasper were on the other side, Alice sitting on Jasper's lap. Alice had told me a few days before that they were expecting. I wondered if their whispered conversation was about the baby.

Lastly, I saw Jake. He had his arms wrapped around his wife, Nessie. They didn't wait as long as Edward and I did to get married. As soon as they moved in together, they were engaged, and, as promised, I threw the bachelor party. It was the best bachelor party ever, equipped with lots of drinking and strippers. Of course, I didn't stick around for all of it, but I was glad to help my best friend out. Their wedding was small and held down by the shore, and shortly after they got back from their honeymoon they announced that Nessie was pregnant. William Quil Black was born with a head full of black hair and dark eyes. He was almost one now and giving Jacob and Ness a run for their money.

I felt a warm hand caress my neck and I turned to find Edward staring at me.

"What are you thinking about, Mrs. Cullen?" he inquired leaning closer to whisper in my ear, sending shivers down my spine.

"Just thinking of how happy and lucky we are." I sighed as he planted a kiss right behind my ear, the place he called my sweet spot.

"Yes, we are, baby," he agreed kissing down my jaw. "When do you think we can leave?" he asked and I laughed.

"We haven't cut the cake yet." I giggled as his arms circled my waist.

"Well, let's get on with it, woman. I have some pleasing to do later on."

"You do, do you?" I laughed.

"Momma! Dadda!" Emma squealed propelling herself onto her dad's lap.

"Hey, sweetheart," Edward said planting a kiss on top her head. He was completely and utterly in love with her and had been since the moment she was born. I was lucky to come in second but I was okay with that; she had my heart, too.

"Tell Daddy and Mommy night-night, sweetie," I heard my mom say.

"No!" Emma screamed grabbing onto Edward's jacket.

"It's okay, honey. You're going to go home with Grandma for a few days. Aren't you excited?" I asked.

"No! No, wanna go!" she yelled and both Edward and I sighed. We held her for a few more moments telling her how much we'd miss her and that we'd call her every day. We told her that she'd have lots of adventures with Grandma and that we'd bring back a surprise to her when we got back. At the mention of a surprise, her eyes widened.

"Surprise?"

"Yes, honey. We'll bring you back a surprise okay?" She nodded. We kissed her again and handed her off to Grandma; she was still whimpering as we let go, but at least she wasn't crying anymore. This would be my first time away from her for longer than a day and I couldn't help the tears that began to form.

"She'll be okay, baby," Edward whispered. "We'll be back before you know it. I can't wait to get you alone, though." I shivered at his remark. I was definitely looking forward to the time alone with him. I leaned forward and kissed him sweetly.

The night flowed from there. We cut the cake and did some dancing and drinking, well, lots of drinking. I had few glasses of champagne so I was feeling really good. At some point toward the end of the night, I announced that Edward and I were leaving, and to my surprise nobody protested. They all stood outside cheering and blowing bubbles as we headed for the limo. We climbed in and waved goodbye to our friends and family before the limo took off toward our destination.

"This dress is absolutely beautiful, my dear, but I can't wait to get it off of you." He cupped my face in his hands, tucking a stray piece of hair behind my ear before leaning in and kissing me chastely on the lips. I couldn't believe this man was now my husband.

We pulled up to the Four Seasons and climbed out. We were staying here for the night before we got on our plane for our honeymoon the next afternoon. The trip was a complete secret. I had no idea where we were headed. All I knew is that it required a passport.

"Good evening, Mr. and Mrs. Cullen," the doorman stated opening the door for us.

"Good evening," I replied as Edward reached out and grabbed my hand.

"If you could let the concierge know that we want a bottle of your most expensive champagne and strawberries sent up to the Presidential Suite," Edward requested as he escorted me into the building.

"Yes, sir," the doorman replied before heading over to the desk.

"The Presidential Suite, Edward? Really?" He kissed my hand innocently and winked at me. All I could do was sigh at his antics because no matter how many times I'd told him it was too much, he never listened.

Like when it was Emma's first birthday, he wanted to have a petting zoo, and although she wouldn't remember anything, he'd insisted. After spending tons of money to have the zoo brought in, Emma had gotten sick and slept most of the day.

Or the diamond he gave me for my engagement ring. I didn't notice it at the time he proposed, but it was an antique band and a nice-sized diamond passed on from his mother.

It was always too much, but he always replied, "Never too much for my girls." I was really hoping he wasn't going to get her the pony she was asking for for her third birthday, but I wouldn't have been surprised if he did.

"This way, Mrs. Cullen," he said seductively. I groaned at him as we got off on the tenth floor and headed down the hall toward our suite.

Suddenly, I was being lifted off the ground and into Edward's arms. I quickly wrapped my arms around his neck so that I wouldn't fall though I doubted he would've let me.

"What are you doing?" I squealed.

"Carrying you over the threshold," he exclaimed. He carried me and placed me down tentatively on my feet.

"I'll be right back. Stay here," he whispered kissing me then immediately leaving. I looked around. The suite was stunning. There were floor to ceiling windows showcasing the beautiful cityscape. On the opposite end of the room were brown, leather chairs and a small, roaring fire, even though it was July and far from cold enough to need it, but it seemed to fit. As I walked around admiring the décor, Edward came back and sauntered toward me.

"What were you doing?" I questioned as he stood in front of me. His tie was loosened and his jacket was off.

"You'll see," he commented grabbing my hand and pulling me in the direction he had just come from. I gasped as we entered into the bedroom. The room was dark but lit by glow of candlelight. There were rose petals strewn on the bed and the floor and soft music was playing in the background as he wrapped his arms around me.

"Surprise," he whispered.

"Oh, my God, it's beautiful," I proclaimed.

"You're beautiful," he responded leaning in and capturing my lips passionately. I moaned at his assault. I wanted him more than anything. I reached up and loosened his tie and began unbuttoning his shirt. His hands made their way down my sides and gently cupped my ass.

"Baby, how do we get you out of this dress?" He groaned and I giggled. It looked like it was an absolute puzzle. I turned around pointing to the hidden zipper in the back. He slowly lowered it, letting my dress pool at my feet. I heard a silent gasp behind me. He'd noticed my blue thong underwear, which happened to be his favorite color on me.

"It was my something blue," I announced turning around and eyeing him innocently.

"Is that so?" he growled pulling me toward the bed and grabbing at my garter and stockings. He pulled them down along with my underwear, his fingers lingering at my heart tattoo I got not long ago with Emma's birth date in it. "I need to be inside of you," he moaned kissing my calf and the outside of my knee. Reaching forward with one hand he cupped my breast and rolled my nipple between his fingers. It hardened instantly. I could feel his arousal through his pants right against where I wanted him the most.

"Yes, please," I begged. I needed to feel him, all of him that second, and thankfully he didn't wait and he didn't ask permission. He lowered his zipper and his pants. Pulling himself out he lined himself up and plunged into me in one swift movement. I was already wet with anticipation for him and groaned in pleasure as he began to pound into me over and over again.

"Oh, my God," he moaned again. "You feel so fucking good," he grated, enunciating every syllable.

"Yes," I mewled. I needed him, all of him. "Yes, baby, fuck me faster," I requested. I grabbed onto his biceps to pull him closer as he drove into me impossibly faster, our skin slapping against each other as a thin sheen of sweat formed.

"Oh, baby, fuck," he spat. I could tell by the way he said that that he was close. He trailed one hand down to circle my clit and I groaned at the sensation. He knew just how to touch me.

As he circled my clit in long, drawn out patterns I began to crumble; I could feel him begin to twitch inside of me. He lifted my legs over his shoulders and his movements sped up, spurring me on toward the most intense orgasm I'd ever had. As wave upon wave of pleasure crashed into me, he dropped my legs and spun me around so I was sitting on top of him. I looped my arms around his shoulders, riding out the rest of my orgasm. He fell back on the bed as I began to ride him, picking up my pace.

"Baby, fuck, you have beautiful tits," he reached up and fondled me, pulling my nipples. I moaned, grabbing onto his hands and kneading myself with him. He groaned at the sight and began meeting me thrust for thrust, hard and fast. I screamed out above him as another orgasm hit me suddenly. I stilled momentarily, feeling myself pulsate around him.

He grabbed my hips and spun me around again pulling out for a second to place me on all fours. I whimpered from the loss of him until I felt him slam into me again. He was deeper at this angle and I couldn't help but fall forward on my elbows unable to hold myself up from the sheer pleasure.

He drove into me fast; I could tell he was getting close. His breath came out in short spurts against my shoulder as he leaned forward, his hands grasping my hips fiercely. Suddenly I felt a slight sting on my ass.

"God, you have such a beautiful ass also." Then I felt the sting again and I realized he was smacking my ass. I couldn't help but groan at the sensation. He'd never spanked me before, but it was strangely arousing. Apparently not expecting my reaction to his smacks, Edward let out a low 'fuck' as his own shattering orgasm took hold of him. He grunted and groaned behind me, grabbing my hips roughly as he shuddered in pure ecstasy.

"Holy shit," he stated falling to the side of me trying to catch his breath.

"You can say that again," I said with my eyes closed. He rolled me over and kissed both my eyelids softly then pulled me to lie on top of his chest.

"I love you, Mrs. Cullen." He sighed, rubbing my back soothingly.

"I love you too, Mr. Cullen," I replied. "Ready for round two?" I inquired half jokingly.

"Absolutely," he declared, and with that he rolled me over so he was straddling me again. "We have six hours left before we have to catch our flight; let's see how many times I can make you cum."

God, I loved this man and he was mine, at last.

**A/N I hope you enjoyed it! I can't believe it's over... I'll still be doing some outtakes, but this is it. *tear* Please leave me love! **

**Also check out my new fic Diamonds are Forever! It's located on my profile. **

**I love you all. xxo**


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